Equal
Time with Bob Boudelang
"George
W. Has Said The State of the Union Like A Real President So
Stop Talking About Enron!"
February 1, 2002
by Bob Boudelang, Angry American Patriot
In
the interests of fairness and impartiality, we've decided
that conservatives should have a voice on this website. So
here he is - Bob Boudelang, American Patriot, with this week's
rebuttal...
Of all the great weeks of triumph of our Great President George W. Bush, this
has been perhaps the greatest and most triumphy. Now he has
given his State of the Union address just like a real president.
And people cheered. Take that!
Now maybe this country can stop this endless hysteria and
lies about Enron not being all Ann Richards fault. It is time
we stopped focusing on the employees and their special 411K's,
or the state pension plans in Florida and Texas that went
on buying Enron stock after the price dropped, or on the stupid
Californios who deserved what they got for deregulating the
wrong way.
Yes, Enron drew up the California deregulation plan that
caused the rolling blackouts until price caps were instituted,
but that does not mean it is Enron's fault that the deregulation
plan did not save anybody money. Deregulation works. It just
doesn't work for everybody. Price gouging is a very ugly word,
and I think you know what I mean.
It is time that we turned a dead ear to these things and
go on with the miracle of deregulation before it goes away
like the energy crisis did. If only we had hurried and given
energy companies like Enron a $35 billion subsidy and tossed
out the stupid environmental laws like Dick Cheney and our
Great George Bush wanted, we could still be enjoying an energy
crisis. Then all these headlines about the Cayman Islands
and shredded documents and phony accounting and suspicious
suicides and investor swindles might never be seen.
Instead now we are mired in the nightmare of conservation
and low prices.
What hypocrites the Democrats are on this fanatical fuss
about Dick Cheney's meeting with Enron. Why is there no outrage
about the Sierra Club? Is it the leftist bias of the yellow
dog journalism press?
The Sierra Club did not get to meet with Dick Cheney and
the Sierra Club made their recommendations publicly, and the
Sierra Club did not stand to make millions from the plan and
the Sierra Club's officers are not on the run or taking the
Fifth, and nobody from the Sierra Club was found shot before
he could testify to Congress (but you cannot prove that was
not suicide). But that is no reason to treat the Sierra Club
any different than Enron.
And no, none of the Sierra Club's crazy recommendations were
actually in our Great Vice President's Energy Plan. Do not
be silly!
But that does not mean he lied when he said they were. This
is an important constitutional principle, and if we toss it
aside now like we did when we were finding out the details
of Slick Willy Klintoon having sex, no president ever is going
to be able to meet behind closed doors with millionaires and
draw up secret plans for the rest of us from now on. Where
will be then, I ask you?
Tell me, whose heart did not break when they saw Mrs. Ken
Lay sobbing on the Today show about how now she is broke and
people are saying rude things (Yes, she still has ten
houses and her husband has millions, but ugly facts like
that is why people hate the leftist media). Mine did not because
I do not have a television, but still.
I was outraged when I heard about that Katey Courage being
so mean. If I had been there and she had been a man and not
any bigger than she is now I would have hit her right in the
nose except for my war wound and my bad back. So there.
And why is there no outrage about Global Crossing, which
Terry MacAuliffe took money from? Yes, Our Great Father of
the President George Bush took money too, but that was different.
After all, the Bush administration canceled a contract
they had given out because there was dirty work there, Matt
Drudge says. It shows how evil Slick Willy and the Democraps
are that they could still hand out crooked defense contracts
more than six months after they left office. Who was ex-president
in July 2001? Arrest my case!
It is plain to all good Americans that the socialist left
is trying to destroy this country by laughing at our Great
Attorney General John Ashcroft because he covered up The Spirit
of Justice and The Majesty of the Law with drapes because
he was ashamed of bosoms. So what? That does not make him
a dangerous crazy person. If it were not for John Ashcroft,
all the detained Middle Eastern Terrorist suspects would be
denied their second amendment rights on guns, and people in
Oregon would be dying with dignity instead of in agony for
their sins as God intended. Do not forget that.
That is why patriotic people only laugh when Our Great President
tells us his mother told him to chew pretzels. That is good
clean fun, of the sort that is too often forgotten in this
era of permissiveness and empty V.
The whole week, after George W. said that, I found myself
often chuckling out loud over Our Great President's wit, but
that is not why people at the bus station complained, if they
really did.
But this is distracting us from the State of the Union speech.
It was the greatest speech any president has ever given anywhere
and I wish I had seen more than the first few minutes it.
I asked Mrs. Rosenfeld at the Daisyview Trailer Park if I
could watch it on her TV, and she said I could. But she had
relatives at her double-wide in to watch too, and with their
constant chatter I could hardly hear. I was right when I said
she was a socialist Democrap of the worst stripe and I was
horrified and appalled and shocked to find that what I knew
all along was true. Worse yet, so was her "so-called" family.
Mr. Padnavatham used to mutter when we watched Our Great
President speak on his TV, but he was mire in the darkness
of Hindu and anyway mostly I could not make out what he said
unless he was shouting.
I knew I was in trouble at Mrs. Rosenfeld's because they
were watching the speech on Dan Blather instead of on Fox
as they ought to. As a result we were all subjected to sinister
spin instead of Tony Snow and Bill O'Reilly telling us how
great George W. was. When Dan mentioned (grudgingly I thought)
that our great George W. had 90% approval ratings Mrs. Rosenfeld
said "Certified by Arthur Andersen" and they ALL LAUGHED.
Then when George W. said, "Yet the state of our union has
never been stronger" Mrs. Rosenfeld said "He sounds like Kenny-boy.
Saying 'Enron has never been healthier.'" I shushed her and
they all looked funny at me.
When he said, "they laugh about the loss of innocent life"
she said "Like 'Lucky me, I hit the trifecta'?" I shushed
her and they all looked funny at me.
"Maybe you better leave," she said. I tried to explain it
was a free country and so I was free to stop her from criticizing
our leaders out loud, but her son who drives a truck got involved
and since I have an injury to my bottom parts from friendly
fire defending our great country from Grenada, I thought it
was best to depart with my dignity intact.
As a result I never did hear about the Middle Eastern terrorists
George W., had discovered in North Korea and the Philippines.
I am sure after I left he explained the miracle of deregulation,
explained why global warming is just a myth, called for repeal
of gun control, ended the tyranny of minimum wage, called
for vouchers and the abolition of public schools, and ended
Socialist Security and the United Nations so that all of America
could see the wisdom of conservative thought. It is clear
our country is happy they have George W. instead of Al Gore
whom they mistakenly voted for.
I was thinking of going to the bar in the bus station to
watch the end of it but I knew they would rather watch the
basketball game, and I am too allowed in there.
The next day I went to the bus station to tell Secret Service
Agent Brown that I had discovered a nest of dangerous Socialist
DemocRats. He nodded and then asked if I was still eating
that ant paste. It is a note of what a great American he is
that even with all his concerns about being permanently stationed
at a bus terminal to look for terrorists he is still concerned
about his friend and I told him so.
He sighed. I think he is as excited as I am about the job
our Great President is doing, even if he cannot show it.
I also got an e-mail from Deputy Jack Oliver with this message
to send to newspapers and websites spontaneously.
Dear Bob,
Tonight,
President George W. Bush addressed Congress and the nation,
reflecting on his first year in office and outlining his plan
for a better America. Today, our country faces a unique moment
in history - we are at war, our homeland was attacked and
our economy is in recession. In the State of the Union speech,
President Bush committed our nation to achieving three great
goals of our time:
Win the
War on Terrorism;
Strengthen Protections of our Homeland; and
Revitalize Our Economy and Create Jobs.
He even sent me a list of links where I could post this message.
But I did not.
What is wrong with Deputy Jack? Why these wishy-washy generalities?
Why is he not more pushy? Why is he not proclaiming the Bush
economic miracle and pointing to the constant alerts from
Homely Secretary Tom Ridge?
Why does he not point to breaking the ABM Treaty? Where is
the victories over the environment and ecology? Where is the
triumph of ending taxes on rich people's inheritances while
giving some of us $300?
Why does he not talk about George's great and soul friend
Pudding, and the way the Russians flew our spy plane back
in triumph after George told the Chinese he was sorry but
did not apologize?
I do not think Deputy Jack is doing a good job at all in
getting out the news of this Great President (who was too
elected since votes do not count). I could do a much better
job, and I am not just saying that because I could probably
get a hat.
By the way, let us have some sympathy for poor Jeb Bush's
Great Daughter and not make jokes about "Just Say Noelle,"
and "the Bush crime family." That is not funny so stop it.
Who among us has not tried to pretend to be a doctor and pass
a fake prescription at 1 am while we had outstanding traffic
warrants once in a while when we was young? It could happen
to anyone. Until you have walked a mile in her shoes, you
should be without sin, as Shakespeare says, or something.
Enclosing let me say that now is the time when I think we
all should knuckle under and support Our Great President in
whatever he wants to do without asking him what it is. And
that goes for all of us, or else!
Bob Boudelang is a Republican Team Leader Who Really Ought
To be Deputy Before the Team Falls Apart, Dammit, Although
That Will Never Happen.
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