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True Dough

(17,091 posts)
Tue May 14, 2019, 06:40 AM May 2019

"Thoughts and prayers" is no longer something I can utter

It's been rendered impotent by the Republicans after shooting incidents and the term is mocked here regularly. So when other tragic situations occur, I see "thoughts and prayers" and I immediately think, "Really, you still use that expression?" For example, when a friend was recently diagnosed with cancer and she revealed it on Facebook, one of the first comments was "You're in my thoughts and prayers."

There's nothing inherently wrong with the idea, just with the Republicans regurgitating it without taking any action on gun regulations.

"Thoughts and prayers" also shows up in this story about two float-planes colliding in Alaska:

https://www.cnbc.com/2019/05/14/floatplanes-carrying-royal-princess-cruise-goers-collide-in-alaska.html


I just cannot bring myself to say that anymore. I find other ways to express it.

19 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
Highlight: NoneDon't highlight anything 5 newestHighlight 5 most recent replies
"Thoughts and prayers" is no longer something I can utter (Original Post) True Dough May 2019 OP
I refuse to allow them to take this away from me. Thoughts and prayers work. marble falls May 2019 #1
For Rethuglicans, "Thoughts & Prayers" is a cop-out... Crowman2009 May 2019 #2
Just the thought of saying it, feels so insincere now unfortunately. dewsgirl May 2019 #3
Insincere is the best way to describe it True Dough May 2019 #4
It's generally a lame excuse for doing nothing...nt Wounded Bear May 2019 #6
Thoughts and prayers equals MIPs... Wounded Bear May 2019 #5
I say that when mocking Republican failures. Thoughts & Prayers, along with Zero Fucks Given TheBlackAdder May 2019 #11
I'm sorry someone robbed you of your platitude by using it in such a platitudinous way. Act_of_Reparation May 2019 #7
That was unnecessary. Expressing genuine empathy verbally for someone is valid. Coventina May 2019 #8
Nope. Act_of_Reparation May 2019 #9
Well, then I hope you also responded in kind to Barack Obama Coventina May 2019 #15
It's not what you say Rambling Man May 2019 #10
Please see my post #15 n/t Coventina May 2019 #16
Thanks, Coventina True Dough May 2019 #14
Your presumptuous post undermines itself True Dough May 2019 #12
"Thoughts & prayers" is another way of saying "I ain't doing shit" FakeNoose May 2019 #13
I agree JuJuYoshida May 2019 #17
"T & P" is a mere reflex-response, and no genuine concern is communicated. VOX May 2019 #18
Yeah, prayers do nothing, and I don't know them Bradical79 May 2019 #19

True Dough

(17,091 posts)
4. Insincere is the best way to describe it
Tue May 14, 2019, 09:11 AM
May 2019

Even if it is intended with full sincerity, it just rings hollow now, for me anyway.

Act_of_Reparation

(9,116 posts)
7. I'm sorry someone robbed you of your platitude by using it in such a platitudinous way.
Tue May 14, 2019, 09:25 AM
May 2019

"Thoughts and prayers" has always been self-serving banal codswallop. The only distinction being drawn here is the line beyond which it is no longer acceptable to tell the suffering how badly you feel for them, without feeling so badly that you are compelled to actually help.

Coventina

(26,861 posts)
8. That was unnecessary. Expressing genuine empathy verbally for someone is valid.
Tue May 14, 2019, 09:32 AM
May 2019

It is true that "thoughts and prayers" has been distorted into sarcasm, but that's not the OP's fault.

Act_of_Reparation

(9,116 posts)
9. Nope.
Tue May 14, 2019, 10:38 AM
May 2019

"Thoughts and prayers" are not a simple expression of empathy. It is a phrase implying effort and possible outcome. For the offerant, it serves as a substitute for meaningful action, a salve to ease the cognitive dissonance caused by feeling for someone in a bad situation while otherwise unable or unwilling to actually help.

If you want to tell someone you care about them, you tell them you care about them. You don't tell them you're going to make time in your busy schedule to think about them and maybe petition your all-powerful skybound father figure for a favor he may or may not (read: may not) deign to fulfill.

Coventina

(26,861 posts)
15. Well, then I hope you also responded in kind to Barack Obama
Tue May 14, 2019, 11:35 AM
May 2019

?lang=en


"We send our thoughts and prayers to all at the Navy Yard who've been touched by this tragedy." —President Obama

Rambling Man

(249 posts)
10. It's not what you say
Tue May 14, 2019, 10:40 AM
May 2019

it's often what you DON'T say and it's definitely what you DO.

Cash is king where meaningless offerings of "thoughts and prayers" are expressed.

True Dough

(17,091 posts)
12. Your presumptuous post undermines itself
Tue May 14, 2019, 11:13 AM
May 2019

You chide me for ever having used the term "thoughts and prayers" (not like it was my go-to expression of solace), but I may have used it occasionally to replace "condolences" or some other term. And you say it's a way of communicating how badly you feel for them without being compelled to actually help. In some cases, I'm referring to sending a card to a grieving individual living halfway across the country who just lost a loved one. What would you have me do, bring the deceased back to life?

Now here's the undermining part, you open your post with "I'm sorry someone robbed you..." but you're not sorry at all. You know what you are? You're insincere, which is what you accused me of being by ever having used the term "thoughts and prayers."

Have a good day! (That's more insincerity, in case you don't recognize it!)

VOX

(22,976 posts)
18. "T & P" is a mere reflex-response, and no genuine concern is communicated.
Tue May 14, 2019, 11:48 AM
May 2019

Most of the time, brevity is best. But uttering a quick, reflexive “thoughts and prayers,” a phrase so utterly devalued by the continuing slaughter of Americans by Americans, carries about as much emotional weight as “Have a nice day.”

And yes, to effectively express genuine grief and sorrow in words takes some actual effort.

 

Bradical79

(4,490 posts)
19. Yeah, prayers do nothing, and I don't know them
Tue May 14, 2019, 11:51 AM
May 2019

You can either do something, or you do nothing. Unless expressing support to a friend or familly, it's just meaningless. Often when it comes to politicians, it's typically insincere virtue signaling.

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