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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsTrump Replaces Fauci with Chuck Woolery
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)In a stunning repudiation of the nations leading infectious-disease expert, Donald J. Trump has replaced Dr. Anthony Fauci with the veteran game-show host Chuck Woolery.
Appearing at the White House with his newest Coronavirus Task Force member, Trump said that he chose Woolery because he has a much better record of success than Tony.
Tony Fauci is a nice guy, but hes been wrong a lot, Trump said. Chuck has made thousands of love connections that turned out a hundred-per-cent right.
Woolery said that his first official act as part of the Coronavirus Task Force would be to eliminate social distancing, calling the practice ridiculous.
How are you supposed to go on a date and stay six feet apart? Woolery asked. If we had social distancing on Love Connection, we wouldnt have lasted a single episode.
He also previewed his approach to clinical trials for potential coronavirus vaccines. Well inject each contestant with three vaccines and see which one hes most compatible with, he said. The audience is gonna eat that up.
Woolery concluded his appearance without taking any questions from reporters, saying, Well be back in two and two.
Short article, no more at link: https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/trump-replaces-fauci-with-chuck-woolery
Fritz Walter
(4,281 posts)In true "life imitates art" fashion, this Borowitz piece reminds me of a reality TV show sketch by The Firesign Theatre -- created over 50 years ago. Now it has taken on a new and very ominous meaning.
The toon adaptation of the radio show segment is surprisingly good.
In case this was (way) before your time, here's info on Firesign Theatre:
Rhiannon12866
(202,970 posts)The name sounded familiar, but I wasn't sure what they did - and it sure sounds like they had a premonition! So much these days is surreal, I'm never sure if it's Borowitz, The Onion or breaking news!
Scarsdale
(9,426 posts)Well, since he had "great ratings" I can understand why tRump is a fan. Dr. Fauci has spent most of his life studying diseases, so naturally tRump will toss him aside. No competent people are allowed in this administration.
Rhiannon12866
(202,970 posts)At least he'd be familiar with history and geography after dealing with the questions and answers for all these years...
JHB
(37,128 posts)...and a big fan of Trump.
In a just world the two of them would while away their "golden years" parked on the end stools of some hole-in-the-wall bar muttering in their cups nursing a beer all day long.
sop
(9,945 posts)Chuck ended up suing the maker of that back pain creme snake oil, claiming they'd cheated him out of his share of the profits.
Ilsa
(61,675 posts)What product of emus are used in this creme?
Woolery is a huckster, like trump, but on a smaller scale.
JI7
(89,172 posts)was when they died .
onecent
(6,096 posts)CAN he?????
tiptonic
(765 posts)This is a joke, right?
Rhiannon12866
(202,970 posts)OneBro
(1,159 posts). . . there was a moment of panic as I quickly scrolled down to see if it was real. Whew! Just Andy doing his thing. Okay, heart rate slowly returning to normal.