General Discussion
Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsWhen you see a panhandler out on the street, what is the first thing that comes to mind?
https://brandongaille.com/21-amazing-panhandling-statistics/23 Amazing Panhandling Statistics
May 22, 2017 by Brandon Gaille
When you see a panhandler out on the street, what is the first thing that comes to mind? Many see panhandlers as lazy people, alcoholics perhaps, and definitely a freeloader. What if everything that society thought about panhandlers happened to be wrong?
In a recent survey, 94% of panhandlers use the funds that they get from the donations of others to simply purchase the food they need.
Some panhandlers do have the ability to make upwards of $80,000 per year, but those are the exception instead of the rule. In San Francisco, for example, the average daily intake for a panhandler is just $25 per day and some people have been living this way for 5 years or more. Many must opt for the cheapest food options available, which mean high fat, low nutritional content foods so that they can stretch their money further.
Three Fast Facts About Panhandling
1. Only 3% of panhandlers dont want some form of permanent housing that would help to get them off of the street.
2. 48% of panhandlers are African American.
3. 1 out of every 4 panhandlers in the United States has served in the military at some point in time.
Takeaway: There will always be people who try to take advantage of others and panhandling is no different. The problem is that an uncaring attitude toward all panhandlers because of the actions of a few creates future problems that will ultimately create even more panhandlers. When more than 60% of panhandlers make less than $25 per day and when more than 60% of them are disabled in some way, that is not a life that anyone would wish on their greatest enemy yet there is an expectation that panhandlers should crawl up out of the mess unassisted and contribute to society because a few take advantage of others.
MORE AT LINK... https://brandongaille.com/21-amazing-panhandling-statistics/
Metatron
(1,258 posts)Hope you enjoy your weekend!
Phoenix61
(16,954 posts)I usually give them a couple bucks if I have cash on me.
I give to the places that provide them with food and shelter, but I don't give to the panhandlers.
There are some in this city who are violent, and I can't take the chance of allowing them to get too close. I'm a 66 year old woman, and it would be extremely careless of me to put myself in that position.
quaint
(2,513 posts)Where I live, people express gratitude. They make me humble.
Rorey
(8,445 posts)Personally, I think it's a better option to give to the local organizations that help folks in need. They're professionals, and they know our homeless community and I feel that they're best equipped to do it.
Besides that, panhandling is illegal in this town, and I don't want to be any part of it. Also, I know how much having panhandlers hanging around local businesses hurts the businesses. I quit frequenting businesses in downtown Colorado Springs because the panhandlers just made it too difficult. The people who make it profitable for the panhandlers who frequent that area are actually hurting the businesses. The small business owners really take a hit because of it.
cannabis_flower
(3,764 posts)Not only because of rules but because they are afraid of getting sick or having their possessions stolen.
moonscape
(4,664 posts)shelter but there arent enough. Beds definitely dont go empty.
Murphyb849
(569 posts)abqtommy
(14,118 posts)rickford66
(5,498 posts)Maru Kitteh
(28,303 posts)they're broke and getting broker.
Thtwudbeme
(7,737 posts)and if I have it, I give it to them.
I am not interested in judging these people or knowing their motives.
Captain Stern
(2,197 posts)My opinion on panhandlers has changed quite a bit of the last thirty years.
I used to never give any single one of them a dime because I figured they were all lazy bums that were trying to get over.
Now, if I don't have good reason to think they are just scam artists (and yes, a small percentage of them are)..I give what I can.
If helping a few people means that I get 'fooled' by one person, that's ok. I'd still rather have helped.
Even if I suspect that the person that is asking is going to use the money on alcohol, or drugs, I give. Me not giving to them isn't going to make them go to rehab that day. But that bottle of wine they get that day, may be what gets them through that particular day, and then a day may eventually come when they get help.
NurseJackie
(42,862 posts)But now I'm like: "What the hell? If they buy cigarettes, or beer or fortified-wine... who cares? Everything else in their life is shitty, and if this helps them get through the day, then why not?"
smirkymonkey
(63,221 posts)It's not up to me to tell them what to spend it on. Whatever gets them through the day. I hope they will reach out for help, but if they just need a cheap bottle of wine to get them through the night, that's their business. Maybe ending up in the hospital will be their first step in getting into some kind of treatment/recovery program.
True generosity of spirit is when you give without judgment or thought as to how your generosity will be used. Giving should be without strings or conditions, otherwise it is manipulation and control.
I don't know what another person's life is like or what experiences brought them to a particular place or situation. It isn't for me to decide what is best for them. A little bit of genuine compassion can go a long way and if it is not appreciated, we are still better for having given it.
"If helping a few people means that I get 'fooled' by one person, that's ok. I'd still rather have helped." Same here.
Me.
(35,454 posts)paleotn
(17,781 posts)it's also incredibly demeaning, particularly in a society that values self reliance so highly. So, if it's a scam, it's a really, really crappy scam. Surely scammers could come up with something more lucrative and less embarrassing.
So, yea, I occasionally give them a buck or two when I have cash on me. Usually folks standing at intersections. What comes to my mind first are two pearls of wisdom from my mom....."Walk a mile in their shoes" and "But for the grace of God go you."
Generic Brad
(14,270 posts)I know I have been scammed for a fact twice for certain.
The first time I gave $20 to this guy and his wife I met on the street. They convincingly told me they were from out of town and had been mugged and their car stolen. They were hungry and lost and just needed cab fare to get back to their hotel. Being the rube I was back then, I willingly gave him all I had on me. Then two months later I was coming out of a Ralph's with my groceries and I saw the same couple telling the same story to someone else in the parking lot. I was incensed and mad at myself for having been tricked.
The other time I encountered a man in a different city who claimed his car had just been stolen and he was afraid to go to the police because he had an outstanding warrant. He convinced me to give him $40 to help him out. Then an hour later I saw him get into a new Mercedes in the ramp where I had parked and drive away.
Those were the turds in the punchbowl for me. I would rather donate to United Way charities and target my assistance to those who really need it.
Side note: some of that is also a cover for people assisting drug sales. When you see a panhandler observe for a while. There is probably an armed overseer watching from across the street and about 2/3 of those who stop are giving directions to where they can pick up the drugs from someone else - also within sight of the armed overseer. I used to see them in my old neighborhood and I can spot them in pretty much every city I go to now.
NurseJackie
(42,862 posts)Personally, I do not like that kind of aggressive approach of walking up to individuals (that's just me... I guess someone's level of desperation or hunger might motivate them to actively "beg" rather than waiting to be noticed and offered a dollar or two.)
In any case, I did call-out one fellow who had twice approached me in the parking lot when I was dropping off at the dry cleaners (which is in a strip-center that also has a 7-11 and liquor store) the first time, I had nothing to give. His story sounded plausible... but I had nothing to give. The next time was when I was picking up the cleaners and he gave me the same "ran out of gas" story. I said "AGAIN?!" and he walked away.
I never saw him again at THAT location... but he probably continued his grift elsewhere. Still, despite his false backstory or reason for needing a handout... I now suspect that this was just a shortcut to getting more money faster, rather than waiting for people to notice them and offer something.
They do become rather ubiquitous and "invisible" and it's easy for us to just look straight ahead and pretend they don't exist.
Generic Brad
(14,270 posts)And I truly emphasize with them. For me, I have faith in my local United Way agencies - so much so that I chair a Budget and Allocations Committee to ensure our community dollars address those needs. But I recognize that others have a markedly different take on all this.
I do appreciate you bringing this topic up for discussion. I have been a fanboy of your posts for the past two election cycles. Keep up the good work!
NurseJackie
(42,862 posts)Joinfortmill
(14,247 posts)Roisin Ni Fiachra
(2,574 posts)year, only one panhandler I encountered in the past year was wearing a mask. I won't stop and give them money if they don't have a mask on.
Most of the panhandlers I encounter in the rural red area where I live are on corners outside grocery stores. I always stopped and gave them money before the pandemic, but now, if they don't have enough consideration for me, and others, to take steps to protect us from Covid, I'm not going to put myself or others at risk by exposing myself to a possible COVID carrier.
dlk
(11,438 posts)Why not help someone? Too many Americans are struggling. Republicans have poisoned the well with their politics of selfishness.The link below is to an article about a Canadian experiment giving homeless $7,500. We can do better for each other.
[link:https://www.goodnewsnetwork.org/canadian-research-project-gave-homeless-people-7500/|
cab67
(2,963 posts)Maybe the scammers were the exception, but my encounters with them have taught me to donate to organizations that aid the homeless - which I do.
Same with my students. The vast majority who tell me they have to miss an exam because of a funeral really are attending a funeral, but a small number used the time instead for additional cramming. It feels ghoulish to ask for documentation for this sort of thing, but I have to ask.
Believe me, not giving panhandlers money goes against every altruistic instinct in my head - but I've learned to look for other ways to help.
dlk
(11,438 posts)Needing money for food and shelter is different than needing extra study time. People lie.
cab67
(2,963 posts)Yes, people lie. That's my point. It's not always a straightforward exercise to tell the liars from those honestly in need.
This is why I prefer to give to charities that help homeless people.
dlk
(11,438 posts)Theres no one size fits all.
George II
(67,782 posts)...and growing up in NYC, I've had lots of experience with panhandlers and homeless people on the street and the subway. I've got dozens of stories.
As pointed out, most of them do not consciously choose that lifestyle - it really is amazing how many are veterans or ex-military people. Right after Ronald Reagan closed a bunch of homeless shelters and homes in the 1980s, it's estimated that there wound up being several thousand homeless people living in Central Park, most of them Vietnam veterans.
Two quick stories:
My college is at the upper end of The Bowery in Manhattan. We couldn't walk from the subway to school without getting stopped at least once each day. One time I was in a particularly smart-ass mood (can you believe it?). I saw a homeless man (back in the 1960s we called them "bums"!) approaching us. I told my friend, "watch this". When he reached us I started first - "excuse me, could you spare some change?" He looked at the change in his hand and said, "I'm a little short now, but I can spare a quarter." THAT is how they were/are - deep down they're just as decent if not more decent than most of us. I apologized, said I was just kidding, and gave him a dollar. He was THRILLED! Folding money was rare.
My dear mother used to carry extra change and small bills in case she ran across a homeless person on the subway on the way to work (she was still working until she was 73). One time she saw a woman sleeping on a bench. So she went over to her and put a few dollars in her hand. A cop saw that and yelled at her, "why are you doing that?". She looked at him and said, "think about it, she could be YOUR mother!" He got a look on his face, thought for a minute, then apologized and walked away.
Her point was that homeless people on the streets can be anybody with any sort of background - rich, educated, ex-military, emotionally ill, etc. Few if any actually choose that lifestyle.
dixiechiken1
(2,113 posts)Compassionate, empathetic and good. Just very, very good. She clearly taught you well. The world could use more people like you and your mother. You - and she - have every reason to be proud.
Lovely stories. Thanks for sharing.
George II
(67,782 posts)thucythucy
(7,986 posts)My mother was a nice person with very many personal problems.
My father was an abusive drunk.
I so envy people who have/had functional, competent, and unconditionally loving parents.
George II
(67,782 posts)thucythucy
(7,986 posts)smirkymonkey
(63,221 posts)In my experience - whether in NYC, San Francisco or Boston - almost everyone I have given money to has been extremely grateful and in most cases have always extended their blessings and well wishes.
It's kind of heartbreaking actually and makes me even more aware of their humanity. These aren't bad people, they are people who have been through a hard time and who are down on their luck who just need a little help and human kindness to get through the day. Every little bit helps and it's not a hardship for me to give away a few dollars here and there.
True Blue American
(17,972 posts)Mental Hospital's, put them all out in the street.
I prefer to give to charities that really help people. FISH, which is a Church organization in my area serving a good share of our Churches, who work together. Salvation Army that does the same thing. Some Churches are even building small houses. Those who work to get people off the street by providing apartments for them to live in, find jobs. Give them a life worth living.
Demsrule86
(68,352 posts)I agree 100%.
Devil Child
(2,728 posts)If the panhandler makes eye contact and approaches me I usually ask them for change as soon as they are in ear-shot. Pre-emptive hustle confuses the hustler.
ChubbyStar
(3,191 posts)You must be so proud.
Devil Child
(2,728 posts)Pride comes from a perfectly made waffle from scratch which is what I'm about to do.
ChubbyStar
(3,191 posts)samnsara
(17,570 posts)Tomconroy
(7,611 posts)I was approached by an older guy who was refreshingly honest: "Now Governor, I'm not going to lie to you. if you give me any money I'm going to spend it on drink!"
He got a pound, which was a lot for a student in those days.
Bernardo de La Paz
(48,789 posts)Yes, need is great everywhere, in Canada too, and there is much that needs to be done to raise up people here. However, generally there are much greater services available to them here.
Like Universal Health Care.
Javaman
(62,442 posts)That was me once.
Thats why I give food or water. Thats what I wanted most.
ChubbyStar
(3,191 posts)I give them water, a few bucks and clothes if they need. I always cry too, it breaks my heart.
hunter
(38,264 posts)In my worst circumstances I learned it was better to be invisible. I've never been a panhandler.
The homeless people in our community say food is rarely a problem. That was my experience as well in a similar community.
There's a guy I know who told me his major problem while homeless was boredom. He had enough food and water. His sleeping place wasn't dangerous or uncomfortable except when it rained. To deal with the boredom he'd sit on a hill overlooking a park drinking. The cheap booze was his only expense.
He was too scruffy to hang out in the library and didn't like reading much anyways. I'm guessing he's dyslexic.
Last I saw him he was in public housing and doing well enough.
My own mind went a little sideways with adolescence and it took me almost a decade to pull it back.
Historic NY
(37,449 posts)Most of what I see where I live is concentrated in the entrance to shopping plazas, along main arteries of traffic, places near restaurants that people would frequent. It almost like someone picked the spots out. These are the same people day after day, shaking a sign. I been observing for sometime, they arrive to work (some by vehicle) usually having a beverage or something to eat. When I say work its like they clock in. The work for food signs are replaced with homeless. Most others i see are outside a business far from these regulars. Those would fall into the can you spare a dollar. I know they get fed by any one of the soup kitchens run by various groups. Their need is for whatever. The block near Social Services or DMV has them. I am not jaded there are people that need and people that grift. I spent 30 yrs dealing with all varieties of people, the truly needy here have multiple places for food, almost every out of business Catholic School's kitchens are used along with the multitude of churches.
I often wonder how much they make a day....
90% plus are white.
Bettie
(15,998 posts)one day, I had to do a lot of running.
In the morning, I saw a family at the entrance to a plaza on one side of town (I gave them some money to "buy gas to make it home" , in the afternoon, the same family was on the other end of town at a different shopping area, with the same sign.
Buckeye_Democrat
(14,847 posts)That probably helps explain the bugged-out eyes of a homeless black man in Philadelphia PA, during my visit there years ago, when I gave him a $20 bill.
He was mostly prostrate on a bench and specifically asked me for some money as I walked past him, despite how I'm LOW middle class economically and there were lots of better-dressed other people walking past him. I told him, "Not now" and continued walking. Then his reply was so sad, weak and demoralized-sounding. "I understand, and bless you anyway." So I stopped in my tracks and returned to him, putting the bill in his hand. I asked him to please seek more help from government agencies, but he maybe didn't hear me because of his expression of extreme relief. Then I went on my way again.
Such a depressing and unnecessary problem in this country.
randr
(12,408 posts)txwhitedove
(3,922 posts)hay rick
(7,521 posts)The first response of many seems to be "He made his bed, he can lie in it." I think this is a fundamental difference between most Democrats and most Republicans. Widespread homelessness, hunger, and poverty in a wealthy society marks a morally destitute culture.
Solly Mack
(90,740 posts)Then I give a few dollars.
Then I feel guilty that I haven't done more.
Then I get angry that people are homeless or in need in America.
I'm a lot of negative things but callous to human suffering ain't one of them. I speak out of anger and frustration at times, but I don't react in that way to someone in need.
Mickju
(1,794 posts)But when I did I would give them $20 because I figured they needed it a lot more than I did. I always felt really bad for them. Where I live now I have never seen a panhandler. I would never assume they are a freeloader. Even if they are an alcoholic it's not their fault. There is no way to know what they are going through.
drmeow
(4,996 posts)is outrage that we have outsourced care of the vulnerable in this country to the charity of strangers. Ronald "I hope he is burning in hell" Reagan and the racist "we're better than others cause we're rich" motherf**kers who orchestrated the start of the fascist takeover of this country have managed to shift the burden of social safety net to charitable organizations and individuals - who can't handle it or who classify some as more worthy than others. If we had a civilized social safety net the vast majority of panhandlers would be scam artists and the charitable organizations would be better able to assist the ones who aren't!
Sometimes I give them a bit of money, sometimes I give them food (or, when I lived in Arizona, water), sometimes I can't do either.
jaxexpat
(6,703 posts)A life that has been blown off course and onto the shoals, the graveyard of lost ships.
KPN
(15,587 posts)Yay, capitalism. We could be so much more.
jaxexpat
(6,703 posts)When you have nothing to give, you're only half alive. If all the available "give" is monopolized, the species is unviable. Inbred "givers" are also unviable and do not govern well, no matter their party.
KPN
(15,587 posts)jaxexpat
(6,703 posts)multigraincracker
(32,531 posts)I dont give to those holding signs. Most will say god bless you. I tell them Im an Athirst with a heart, most do.
A good story, I really dont care if its true, gets a 10 or 20 from me. I like to encourage good stories.
Dream Girl
(5,111 posts)Got it.
multigraincracker
(32,531 posts)Im alleviating suffering or if its a scam. I know a good story when I hear one. I donate to orgs that help out.
hlthe2b
(101,730 posts)There was a guy who staked out central Denver near Broadway all the time, holding a big hand-written sign: "FBI!"
When you got a bit closer, it said in smaller letters: "Flat Broke Indian"...
I always stopped to give him a few dollars and to talk with him. He really was a humorous guy (and a Vietnam Vet in addition to being Native American). I've wondered what happened to him since...
robbob
(3,514 posts)is do I have any change in my pocket?. Simple as that.
anotherOKIE
(90 posts)I always think, "but for the grace of God, go I". I know that I could have turned out to be homeless and a beggar if I hadn't had family and others give me advice and help when I was young. I am 70 now.
I was 19 the first time I gave to a beggar; it was in Southeast Asia. A local resident was guiding me and I was going to give money to a legless man begging on the street. My guide was alarmed and said "No, no that is his karma". So I walked on by without giving him anything but later saw the same legless man begging and stopped to give him money.
I was in Walgreen's and the man ahead of me at the checkout was buying some item (I don't know what) and he wanted to purchase two small bags of chips but it came to more money than he had. I told the clerk to put them on my tab. When I left the store he was waiting for me and thanked me but asked if I could help him out. While his wife waited in the car, he told me that he was in town to start a new job with school district but they only had enough money for a room for the night. I gave him all I had, 20 dollars, and told him to get himself and his wife a hot meal. The clerk, whom I knew, later said "You didn't give him any money did you?" and I answered "no".
A fairly young man in a wheelchair was begging near the building I worked in and I had to stop at a light; it was under an overpass. He was holding a small sign that said "anything helps". I rolled down the window and held out a five dollar bill. I wondered if he could reach the money because there was a tall curb between us but, surprisingly, he got out the wheelchair easier than I thought he should have and it seemed that he was feigning disability. I later was looking out the window of my workplace and saw the same guy walking very jauntily down the sidewalk and pushing the empty wheelchair. I thought "I just gave him 5 bucks for liquor".
I was in the grocery store parking lot and young boy approached. He was maybe 12 years of age. He asked for money and pointed to a women nearby and said that's my mother. I gave him some money and went on into the store. The next week the same happened. I said to him, loud enough for his mother to hear, "You're not scamming me, are you?". His mother hollered over to me "No sir. We really are homeless". I gave the boy something and told him that he should be in school and that he needed to help his mother get settled down. I never saw them after that but I hope the boy is doing ok.
TygrBright
(20,733 posts)...such a terrible shortage of social service resources, such a critical shortage of health resources, such a shitty way to connect people to the jobs opening up and support them as they readjust to employment, and such an overwhelmed and under-trained police force."
Well, you asked, what's the first thing that comes to mind.
That's it, every single time.
That's why I pay my taxes promptly and cheerfully, vote Democratic, caucus Democratic, participate in development of the Party Platform, regularly contact my elected representatives to encourage them when they get it right and express my unhappiness when they don't, and discuss these issues regularly in any public forum, supporting public resources for these purposes.
I also regularly support various charities that work to address those issues.
Oh, and I LOOK at the panhandlers. And smile at them if I can't at least greet them and wish them good luck.
sadly,
Bright
AnnetteChaffee
(1,979 posts)My brother was in a homeless shelter for a while (his choice) and he said that every evening the guys would get together to smoke and talk about how much money they took in from panhandling. He said it was amazing how much money they made.
If I see someone, I look at their energy - do they look like someone who needs money, or who needs food or clothing? I'm more likely to pick up an extra burger and fries and hand it to them than I am to give them cash (see paragraph above). I also look at their shoes - you don't know how many "homeless" people I've seen panhandling in Florida who are walking with their signs and Nike's on their feet, or talking on their cellphone. Florida has a very bad situation with the homeless, but they also have many people who are in it for the scam.
Since I work for the VA, I give all the time to our Volunteer services for our Homeless Veterans. They help those Veterans who are living in the woods (they are all over here in Orlando) or who are homeless or trying to get on their feet and get a job - I donate clothing, shoes, socks, blankets, toiletries- we have a list that tells us what they need and I keep a box in our department with the list next to it so that we can make sure to always remember to support our Veterans. We fill that box about every month or so and I call Volunteer services and the come pick it up and distribute it. Always keep the shampoos and soaps from hotel stays -they are much needed by the homeless!
annette
Polly Hennessey
(6,747 posts)WhiteTara
(29,676 posts)plight and gratitude that it is not mine. I mostly give to people at the stop lights unless it's just too impossible.
Politicub
(12,163 posts)I have an incessant tape repeating in my head that scolds people for giving panhandlers and homeless people money. I heard the admonishment long ago, and am considering the cruelty of the idea.
People beg for various reasons, and were not able to discern what circumstances brought them to this point. So, being guided by the notion that giving money harms someone denies them agency. It robs people of their individual humanity.
Imho, gifts should be given freely, without expectation. If giving makes the giver feel better about themselves, the money is still given; how the giver feels afterward is of no consequence to the beneficiary.
And who is to say an organization knows whats best for someone?
Its a complex issue, and blanket admonishments for giving are propagated without much thought.
I follow my gut, I guess. Thats also a form of judgement, but it takes me out of the trap of believing that giving is unhelpful to everyone.
On edit: I usually dont give anything to people who walk up to me in a parking lot. I dont feel safe in that situation.
Hugin
(32,778 posts)(I don't know if it is mentioned in this particular piece)
Is that the simple act of setting them up with a mail drop convenient to them could change their lives. I guess the theory was it provided them an anchor to establish a consistent identity and means of asynchronous communications required for daily living which they lacked. I remember reading it allowed for them to reconnect with friends & family, receive health care, and establish employment.
I imagine a cell phone might be the modern equivalent.
I will generally kick what I can into their cup depending on the circumstances of our encounter. I know there are certain establishments which are very regressive against their presence and I try to discourage them from remaining in those areas.
Greybnk48
(10,148 posts)I think of Reagan when I see poor and homeless people. Here's a paper on how it was done, and it WAS deliberate and evil.
https://sfist.com/2016/06/27/san_francisco_homeless_history_1982/
sarge43
(28,939 posts)Thank you for posting this.
thucythucy
(7,986 posts)is such a pernicious myth.
I see it when I talk to disabled friends who apply/receive SSI or SSDI or Medicaid. The system treats them like they're all criminals, erecting so many obstacles to those who need assistance through no fault of their own (and even if they are at fault they still don't deserve that kind of humiliation).
What graft there is is overwhelmingly at the top: for instance--rehab administrators and nursing home owners milking the system. When they get caught they usually get away with a fine--a slap on the wrist. Some of them end up as elected officials.
I see a panhandler and think that could easily have been me, if just one of the many breaks I've received in my life didn't fall my way.
Thank you for posting this information.
Joe Nation
(961 posts)and needed 5 dollars. In my area that mean meth. She looked like a meth addict. I have given them food but I will not give the money.
Stuart G
(38,365 posts)we are all about. (and the panhandlers too) ...Most are good, (whatever that means) some are "bad"
and some are quite..."ugly" Life in the U.S.A. is quite a show... At least the present director/producer
currently in charge has a "heart" (a very large heart, I might add)
....The last one was quite a "selfish asshole" & had no heart......
cate94
(2,797 posts)And called the panhandler over, thinking I had a five in my wallet. All I had was a twenty. I handed it to her and she jumped straight up in the air. Bless you, bless you, bless you.
Im not terribly comfortable giving when Im walking in the city, so I keep a few dollars in the outside pocket of my purse, just in case. And I really feel that if someone is scamming me thats on them. Id rather be wrong and kind.
Hugin
(32,778 posts)The important thing for me is -- What was my intent? Something stirred in my heart and I acted out of kindness and love. For most of my life now, my intent has been to see the face of God in everyone and everything. I don't want to have some kind of karmic entanglement with others which compels me to return to this Earth yet again. In these days, I am really struggling to maintain that attitude.
cate94
(2,797 posts)crickets
(25,896 posts)cate94
(2,797 posts)Native
(5,935 posts)She had a large shopping cart filled with her belongings and a couple of additional bags on the ground that she was going through. As I was leaving the parking lot I saw her sit down, and I noticed that her face was very red (it was an unseasonably hot day here in Florida). I parked my car and went over to give her all the money I had in my wallet, which was about 40 bucks. She looked at me like I was crazy and snarled at me. I had to shove the money into her hand to get her to take it. As I walked to my car she just made grunting noises at me. Broke my heart to not be able to do more for her.
llashram
(6,265 posts)the first thing that comes to mind. Yet, I then remember my rough days way back when. I was living in a 2 dollar a night rat and roach-infested room. PTSD running rampant through my brain and body. Recovering also from a very serious accident. I had a dishwashing job at the local Elks club and didn't have to ask, "please sir may I have more" from anyone. Except more hours to work which I got periodically when a large event happened, but still bare minimum on the personal sustaining level.
Now I just try to keep a few dollars on me. There is this one family, father, mother, two kids with a sign that I try to help when I get my pension. Compassion is first now. But depending on the mood, oh no slips out sometimes. I am just human and get selfish at times. I do also try to remember that I don't know the misfortunes that might have happened to that person or persons and just try to do my little part. I drop the judgments and just try to help no matter what they might do with any money they may get. I just hope if there are issues such as addiction and the like that they can get help if they want to live.
I move on.
Great OP.
FailureToCommunicate
(13,989 posts)stop lights. And, unlike many young people these days, always try to have some cash in my pocket.
Sometimes, if it's raining, and and I have an extra umbrella in the car, I hand that over to them.
"They" are just "us" with a few different circumstances.
Hoyt
(54,770 posts)Azathoth
(4,603 posts)Guys who religiously work particular intersections at rush hour, or who work certain subway and commuter trains regularly with a rehearsed and refined patter. Some are genuinely talented.
I don't question the fact that they're genuinely in need, and everyone hits hard times at some point in their lives. But if you're able to panhandle steadily, there's no reason why you can't get at least a part time job somewhere. It's hard not to conclude that many career panhandlers are doing it specifically because they can earn a bare subsistence living without having to give up things they would otherwise have to give up (or at least control) in order to hold a job (drug/alcohol addiction, etc.)
gulliver
(13,142 posts)I give through highly rated charities almost entirely. I also "give at the store" pretty much whenever I am asked at checkout. That way I know the money is going to be spent efficiently and effectively.
Give $20 to a random person on the street, and you're possibly fueling their drug habit, or enabling them to live in a dangerous or unacceptable situation. Worst case, you're handing money to a scammer.
I'll give to buskers or people identifying with a known charity. Paying hobos/itinerant workers for work can't really be done any more because of liability. If we had a way to distinguish scammers from basically legitimate mendicants and pilgrims, etc., I'd feel better about handing money to strangers, but I don't think we are in that situation in most places. Maybe some kind of IDing and credentialing process could be used...idk.
LastLiberal in PalmSprings
(12,539 posts)"What did you give him?" said the second photographer.
"I gave him 1/60 at f8," replied the first.
--------
My first thought is, "There but for the grace of God go I."
If they ask for money I'll always give them a dollar, three dollars if they have a really creative "down and out" story. If they send their young son or daughter to ask for money I'll give the child five dollars, even though I don't like to see a parent treat their child that way. It's not the child's fault their parent is using them.
hunter
(38,264 posts)Sometimes I get the furtive wave and a nod thing as they pass quickly by.
A few weeks ago I was really sad when I saw someone I'd met in the psych ward. They were not looking good and avoided me. I would have happily stopped to chat and give them whatever money I had with me.
Our society has to accept the reality that even with good mental health care (which is largely unavailable in the U.S.A.) a certain number of people will remain unemployable. Without appropriate housing, and without some level of supervision, these people will end up on the streets.
We can't warehouse all the homeless people in dreary institutions, or put even more of them in prison then we do now, not any more than we can rehabilitate them and turn them all into "productive" self-sufficient individuals.
Sometimes I see myself as a homeless guy who got lucky. I'm white, I'm generally affable, and I have a few obsessive compulsive disorders that are beneficial in some kinds of work. Even at my very worst I still manage to maintain a social safety net of family and friends.
One of my grandmas was an OCD bag lady who happened to be functional enough at work that she retired with a pension and a home she owned outright. Then she became a full time bag lady and a danger to herself and others because she had a mean streak and could be violent. Some of her neighbors loved her, others were scared of her.
After she was forcibly removed from her home by the police and paramedics no "assisted living" program would tolerate her for long. Then she'd end up living with my parents, bringing her chaos into their household. She wasn't all bad, but at her worst she was a holy terror.
It's very clear to me that I'm at least a quarter of my crazy grandma.
cannabis_flower
(3,764 posts)Let me add some personal perspective here. I have been both homeless and a panhandler, although not for very long and not both at the same time.
I had been working temporary clerical jobs through an agency. When one job would end Id file for unemployment until they got me another one. My deadbeat husband wasnt working. We ended up living in an abandoned house after we couldnt pay the rent on the apartment.
I got sick of it and left with another guy who was also doing temporary work. We had enough money to get a small apartment but we were dead broke and didnt have money for food, gas, and other necessities. We were both waiting on unemployment but also got jobs pretty quickly but as we didnt have any money coming in for about a week or so.
I will add that he did drink beer and smoked cigarettes. He was a big guy and we both thought him asking for money might be intimidating. At that time I didnt drink and wasnt spending any money on other drugs, not even marijuana . So I went over to the Kmart parking lot every night for about an hour to get $25 or $30 for beer, cigarettes, food, pantyhose, gasoline and medicines. I did embellish my story a little bit. I would carry an empty prescription bottle and say I needed money to get the prescription filled even though that was only true one time.
I might add that he had been homeless for a longer period of time and refused to go to shelters. Not only because they wouldnt let him drink but also because he said that other homeless people had stolen his things when he was there and he had to sleep near a guy who had a horrible cough and was afraid he would get sick there. For a while when he had a truck and a ladder he would climb up onto a building with a flat roof an sleep there until the police caught him and thought he was a burglar. He was able to talk his way out of it by saying he was early to work on the roof but he decided not to do it anymore since he didnt want to go to jail.
I remember one guy saying he could help me get a place to stay and food. I told him I wasnt homeless. He said he wouldnt give me money for my drug problem . I wish I had asked him if he would help me by putting gas in my car. Instead I wrote a note on his car telling him how rude he was to just assume I had a drug problem.
My boyfriend was abusive. A girlfriend was there with me one day and we both left and were homeless. At the time I had a good job. That night we slept in the car at 24-hour flower shop. The next day we both stayed at a friends house and the next day we stayed at a motel for a week. After that we split up and I stayed on a former coworkers couch for a week before getting a weekly room for a while. I eventually got a real apartment.
Tracer
(2,769 posts)... I used to work at a city location that was full of homeless/alcoholic/crazy men.
- One day, I went to a nearby restaurant for a sandwich and got punched by a nutter outside the door.
- Another day, a crazy man spit and beat on my car while screaming curses at me.
- Just one more story: While walking to get my car from the garage, I saw a really mentally ill, very big guy coming my way, and moved to the edge of the sidewalk to avoid him. He was singing. As we passed, he swung out his arm, hit me, and slammed me into the street. He never stopped singing.
haele
(12,581 posts)And is homeless for an equally large number of reasons. Disabilities -mental or physical, addiction, just bad luck, or someone who can't be hired because of personality issues or a felony background.
Or they're people who should be getting -or are getting - SSDI or SSI, but can't make it work otherwise.
Frankly, it's hard work standing out on the side of the road begging out in the elements for hours, even if the hobo on the street with a cardboard sign is one of those apocryphal millionaire beggars, or part of a gang that supposedly makes thousands daily on freeway off ramps.
If I have the traffic time and a few spare coins or a dollar bill, a water bottle or a spare kid's car snack packet, I'll usually pass it on.
They're people too. And that's the only job they can get.
Haele
Heartstrings
(7,349 posts)My daughter and I recently took a short trip to New Orleans and our hotel was in the French Quarter. We did the touristy beignet thing and had leftovers, each of us having a small bag. My daughter gave hers to a man who was very appreciative. I gave mine to a young blonde woman who vaguely acknowledged me. I thought nothing of it at the time. On our way back we passed her in the same spot however she had a freakin noose around her neck! Yes, a noose!!
My daughters a graduate of AADA (American Academy of Dramatic Arts) and for one of her classes she became the victim of abuse and pan handled in full make up, outside a Target store in Pasadena so shes quite familiar with the shock value of performance art.
But was this performance art or a cry for help? Was she trying to say look at me! I exist! Im not invisible! as everyone just walked on by? We did go back the next day but she wasnt there. Well never know what her story is and it haunts us
..
Vinca
(50,170 posts)I've decided to think of as eternal panhandlers. They come in both genders, 99.9% white and occupy a spot at the entrance to the grocery store shopping center. Their signs vary and occasionally appear to wear out from overuse. They're mostly younger people who appear healthy (although you have to suspect drug abuse) and the few I've talked to seem intelligent. What irks me is they're surrounded by "help wanted" signs put up by the grocery store. The store is desperate for employees. Across the street there is a True Value hardware store that also can't find employees. This particular group of panhandlers seems to have actual shift changes from what I've observed. I think most of the regular shoppers have had it with them and never give them money. Sometimes an out-of-state car will stop and someone will hand them money, but I honestly don't understand why these people waste their time begging. By the way, I live in an area with all kinds of social services and places to stay for people who are homeless, hungry, etc., etc., etc. During the pandemic an entire Quality Inn was rented to house them and there are active nonprofits renovating buildings for people who need affordable housing. There are food kitchens open somewhere every day of the week (the churches alternate meals). It's hard to ignore people who are panhandling, but I've reached the "tough love" stage of donating.
hunter
(38,264 posts)That there are "help wanted" signs is a lame excuse to ignore the problem.
I don't give a lot of money to panhandlers, at least not with a somewhat credible story in return, but my wife and I do donate quite a bit to the local food banks and shelters.
It would be a better world if we didn't need these charities, especially those permeated with religious bullshit.
Vinca
(50,170 posts)gave some money to because he was so honest said he just liked the freedom of living outside with his dog. I imagine most of them are employable and I suspect many of them have a better education than I do. My point is, the people I'm talking about truly are not interested in working . . . especially if people are giving them money day after day, month after month, year after year. One day last summer I was watching a new guy among them who appeared to be making a film and I wondered at that moment if we'd all been had and this was a cast we'd been watching. That guy disappeared, but some of the others remain. I agree with you completely about religious bullshit, but a few of the churches around here do a very good job at feeding hungry people and I've never heard of them "spreading the word" as they do so.
hunter
(38,264 posts)... and sometimes violent personality disorders.
Winos are usually fairly benign.
They don't throw rocks at you.
There are certain people we should be "giving money" to, "day after day, month after month, year after year," because the only alternative is to kill them or let them die.
Random donations off the street, or charities, especially religious charities, are not the best way to accomplish that.
Most homeless people would be functional enough to stay out of trouble in mildly supervised public housing. Some of them might even become employable.
Vinca
(50,170 posts)overtly ill. There are other people in other parts of town who do have obvious mental health issues and booze problems and a couple of years ago I saw one guy keel over from an overdose of opioids. All panhandlers are not the same. If the people I'm speaking of are organized enough to work in shifts, I somehow think they could manage a job of some sort. I'm not suggesting they become CEO of a major corporation, but $15 - $17 and hour for entry level, menial employment is not unusual where I live. Like it or not there are a few people out there who have no desire to help themselves when they're fully capable of doing so. People who need help should get help. I agree. But when I see the group of people I'm referencing I think that's what Donald Trump would have been if dad hadn't gifted him a pile of money.
hunter
(38,264 posts)... which I personally find more annoying.
And I'd venture that "people out there who have no desire to help themselves when they're fully capable of doing so" have some sort of screw loose as well.
How do we reduce the harm done by people like that?
Donald Trump included.
Vinca
(50,170 posts)on with life. There comes a time when living in the woods with the dog ends by choice and life continues on a different path. Having grown up in the 60's, been there, done that.
FlyingPiggy
(3,373 posts)They worked in shifts. One guy used the $ to make payments on his red truck (someone on fb exposed him). I dont doubt that there is a real need but I once went to one of the panhandlers and asked him if he wanted items like antifungal cream or soap. He said no. He didnt want anything but money. At one point, one guy even got mad when you dont give him money. He starts yelling on the corner.
I dont give money anymore. I give food. I go buy a meal from whataburger and give it to them. I pass out water bottles. I give money and donate goods to the homeless shelter all the time instead. But I wont give money to panhandlers.
There was a big hullabaloo in my area about the homeless and the homeless here consistently choose to not take advantage of the copious resources available to them. But mental health access is not one of them. It is painstakingly clear they (and everyone else in America) need better mental health access. We are failing terribly in this as a society.
I know my post wont be a popular sentiment here. But that has been my experience and why I, and the area I live in (thank god), wont give to panhandlers anymore.
Response to FlyingPiggy (Reply #87)
Raine This message was self-deleted by its author.
Treefrog
(4,170 posts)I will buy food or water to give them. One freezing in night in DC last winter, I gave a 20 to an older woman curled up in a doorway. She wasnt actively begging, in fact I woke her. I still remember the look on her face. The fear, followed by disbelief, followed by gratitude.
It haunts me.
Ms. Toad
(33,915 posts)But the ones who grab my attention (and to whom I often give a gift) are the ones who are doing something to make themselves stand out.
We have 3 corners near where work on the exit and entrance ramps to the highway. One guy started out by picking up the trash on the corner - put out a sign that said he was cleaning the area. Since then he's created a nice little garden (rock border, a few flowers) and has put up a sign with a donation account to help keep the area pretty.
It took way longer than it needed to to clean it up - and I suspect a lot of cleaning was just moving things from on spot to another and taking a little away each day - but it looks very nice (compared to the other two corners), so I fairly frequently help pay for his efforts.
Raine
(30,540 posts)I don't hand out money to people on the street, I'd rather donate to a charity instead.
Kaleva
(36,147 posts)If I saw one across the street back when I was stationed in Philly, I'd cross the street and give him a couple of dollars or so.
roamer65
(36,739 posts)I put them out for them in a known area near me where they constantly search the trash for them.
One of them I gave a ride to another gas station the other day. He was nice and I gave him money. He was out looking for the bottles. Something I did only because I am a big, strong burly man.
lunatica
(53,410 posts)I also carry dollar bills in my car to give to the homeless.
SWMO_8541
(34 posts)If I was in the same situation- homeless, hungry, jobless, depressed-
Im not sure that I wouldnt spend the money on liquor or drugs to escape the terrible reality I was in.
In a way, it made sense to me.
marie999
(3,334 posts)When we see them walking on the highway we always stop and give them $20. I do ask them if they are veterans because if they are I can take them to the VA office if they want. Most veterans don't know that if they are 65 years old or older and meet certain requirements they are eligible for up to almost $14,000/year minus any income they have. Also Aid and Attendance or Housebound. Service-connected disability can be much higher, a 100% service-connected veteran can get $4,500/month or more from the VA and Social Security tax-free at any age. All veterans should check to see if they are eligible for VA Healthcare.
TexasBushwhacker
(20,044 posts)Maraya1969
(22,441 posts)say, "Thank you" which they always do I tell them that they are most welcome. I try to make their day a little better.
Dial H For Hero
(2,971 posts)Just being honest
The Jungle 1
(4,552 posts)I was walking into a burger joint and a guy asked for money. I bought him a burger. He tore it in half and gave his buddy half.