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Fri Mar 29, 2019, 12:42 AM

Does Everyone Else Ask Permission to Pet a Stranger's Dog?

I never even thought about it until someone told me I shouldn't just run up to strange dogs cooing loudly with arms outstretched. Maybe I'm being impolite? What is your take?

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Reply Does Everyone Else Ask Permission to Pet a Stranger's Dog? (Original post)
ProudLib72 Mar 2019 OP
pnwest Mar 2019 #1
OhNo-Really Mar 2019 #2
PoindexterOglethorpe Mar 2019 #3
Aussie105 Mar 2019 #4
JI7 Mar 2019 #5
Iggo Mar 2019 #6
samnsara Mar 2019 #26
IcyPeas Mar 2019 #7
The Velveteen Ocelot Mar 2019 #8
Marie Marie Mar 2019 #9
RockRaven Mar 2019 #10
DBoon Mar 2019 #11
cstanleytech Mar 2019 #12
jberryhill Mar 2019 #13
ProudLib72 Mar 2019 #33
jberryhill Mar 2019 #37
hibbing Mar 2019 #43
jberryhill Mar 2019 #52
TygrBright Mar 2019 #14
ZZenith Mar 2019 #15
Runningdawg Mar 2019 #31
Instant Liberal Mar 2019 #16
Laffy Kat Mar 2019 #17
ProudLib72 Mar 2019 #34
Laffy Kat Mar 2019 #39
ProudLib72 Mar 2019 #41
Laffy Kat Mar 2019 #49
CentralMass Mar 2019 #18
smirkymonkey Mar 2019 #42
KT2000 Mar 2019 #19
Bluepinky Mar 2019 #20
Doreen Mar 2019 #21
ProudLib72 Mar 2019 #35
llmart Mar 2019 #47
Doreen Mar 2019 #53
democratisphere Mar 2019 #22
tazkcmo Mar 2019 #23
retread Mar 2019 #24
samnsara Mar 2019 #25
Croney Mar 2019 #27
NotAPuppet Mar 2019 #28
True Dough Mar 2019 #29
ProudLib72 Mar 2019 #55
True Dough Mar 2019 #57
lark Mar 2019 #30
TexasBushwhacker Mar 2019 #32
ProudLib72 Mar 2019 #36
TexasBushwhacker Mar 2019 #44
ProudLib72 Mar 2019 #45
kairos12 Mar 2019 #38
Beringia Mar 2019 #40
3catwoman3 Mar 2019 #46
ProudLib72 Mar 2019 #48
Dem2theMax Mar 2019 #50
ProudLib72 Mar 2019 #54
Dem2theMax Mar 2019 #56
k8conant Mar 2019 #51
Hotler Mar 2019 #58
akraven Mar 2019 #59

Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 12:46 AM

1. Always ask. If the dog is unreceptive to

strangers, asking will keep you from getting bitten - and some people just plain donít want anyone petting their dog. But mostly itís about not getting nipped by a dog afraid of strangers, giving the owner a chance to warn you to approach slowly, or not at all.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 12:46 AM

2. I do

For the dog's comfort as well as the owners

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 12:48 AM

3. I always ask permission.

You have no way of knowing if the dog is open to being petted by a stranger. Some of them are not, and you're taking a huge chance just to run up to them and start petting. So if you're ever bitten or mauled, don't complain.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 12:54 AM

4. Definitely ask.

Let the dog sniff your legs first, if you have dogs of your own.
If the tail wags, you are ok. Then ask.

I made the mistake of patting a young dog without asking. The dog rolled over, all submissive. Owner glared, obviously he wanted the puppy dog to grow up 'tough'.

Asked to pat a working, young Labrador. A definite no-no, apparently. Guide dog looked so bored, though.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 12:55 AM

5. it is better to ask just in case there might be issues with the dog

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 12:58 AM

6. If the dog walks up to me and asks me to pet him, I'm gonna pet him.

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Response to Iggo (Reply #6)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 09:23 AM

26. yep if dog runs to me and nuzzles my hand and smiles and slobers I will

.....pet un-asked but ONLY under those circumstances...or a very small puppy...as they may be needing to be contained for a frantic owner running after them.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 12:58 AM

7. Yes.

I often run into neighbors in the elevator who have dogs, and i always ask. Happily the answer is usually YES.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 12:59 AM

8. Always.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 12:59 AM

9. I usually ask, "Is he friendly?" with a smile to let them know that I am "pet friendly".

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 01:00 AM

10. I don't ask, but only because I don't desire to pet strangers' dogs... if I did, I would.

As a rule, however, I think one should always ask. Some dogs are very anxious/nervous, some are very protective/defensive, and just because these dogs do not do well in encountering new humans does not mean that their owners do not take them out in public.

Just put yourself in the dog owners position. Imagine you have one such dog yourself. Imagine the stress and worry every time someone tries to pet your dog -- that the dog will be distressed, that they will react poorly, that they will injure the petter, that they will be harmed in turn, that you will yourself be embarrassed, that you will encounter legal liability, etc, etc.

There are many, many worse ways to be impolite than being enthusiastic about meeting a new dog. It is certainly not the worst faux pas, or even universally a faux pas at all. But it is more considerate of the doggo's personality to acknowledge they might not want the attention, and also the human will probably appreciate being recognized too.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 01:02 AM

11. Does the dog ever ask permission before biting you?

A nervous or afraid dog will bite if improperly approached by a stranger. The definition of "improper approach" is up to the dog, and may not make sense to any human.

Don't ever pet a dog without asking permission

Dogs respect their owners, and the owners know their dog

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 01:05 AM

12. I ask as its only polite plus every dog is different and not all dogs are friendly to anyone

but the person they own.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 01:05 AM

13. Stranger than what?

 

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Response to jberryhill (Reply #13)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 01:05 PM

33. You'd be surprised how many strange people have nice dogs

There is a dude at the park who is downright unfriendly, but he has a very nice Bernese Mountain Dog.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Reply #33)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 01:25 PM

37. I always think of, like, Hitler's dog

 

Hitler's dog was always happy to see Hitler.



Like... "Oh, Great! Hitler's Here! Yay!"

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Response to jberryhill (Reply #37)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 04:48 PM

43. I feel bad for laughing n/t

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Response to hibbing (Reply #43)

Sat Mar 30, 2019, 12:53 AM

52. Just waggin her tail and dancing with joy

 

ďOh boy! Hitlerís here!Ē

I also think about Hitlerís dog when people say dogs are good judges of character.

Mmmmm.... maybe not the best judges of that. Then again, Hitler fooled a lot of people too. So, maybe dogs are at least as good as people at it.

Hitler got along great with his dog, so, okay, dogs are good judges of who is going to be nice to them or feed them. That might often be signs of a person with good character. Or it also just might be a sign of a horrible human being who, surprisingly, gets along well with dogs.



So, I ask you...

Would you pet Hitlerís dog without asking permission?

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 01:08 AM

14. Always! With one exception.

Some dogs get nervous around strangers and their body language may not be clear.

I generally say something like "What a nice dog! Are pets welcome?"

However, on occasion I run across a Canine-Friend-Of-All-The-World who trots up with tail wagging and eyes bright and virtually shoves a head under my hand, and then it's like, "I guess you LIKE pets, huh?"

Even then, I usually look at their human companion for an okay even as I'm petting.

responsively,
Bright

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 01:17 AM

15. "May I meet your dog?" has always worked wonders for me.

Only been denied twice, and when the reasons were explained I was glad I asked.

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Response to ZZenith (Reply #15)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 11:17 AM

31. As the mother to 3 wonderful rescued pits - this is the perfect way to ask!

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 01:40 AM

16. Always ask.

It's considered rude and could very well be dangerous with some dogs. Most dogs it would be fine but some are protective, or maybe have issues with perhaps men in hats, or sunglasses. Also, refrain from even asking someone with a service animal. They're trained to do certain things and shouldn't be distracted while they're "working". Think if you would like s stranger to come up a hug your child.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 01:41 AM

17. I do unless the doggo is at a dog park.

If it runs up to me for lovin' it's gonna get lovin'.

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Response to Laffy Kat (Reply #17)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 01:11 PM

34. That's usually where I am petting dogs

However, we have some rather large parks around here where petting is questionable. Imagine five square miles of park where dogs can run around freely. The owners might be a hundred yards from their dogs.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Reply #34)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 02:51 PM

39. I know. Often the owner is talking to another owner and is oblivious.

I'm pretty good at reading doggo body language and won't reach out if there is any question. However, if they run up to me with tails wagging and ears back, they're fair game, IMO. (The dogs, not the owners, LOL.)

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Response to Laffy Kat (Reply #39)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 04:23 PM

41. I just got back from one such large scale park

Where I ran into a three to four month old golden puppy with oh so soft puppy fur. How am I supposed to resist THAT?!?! Of course, my dog got jealous and growled.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Reply #41)

Sat Mar 30, 2019, 12:12 AM

49. It's hard to resist puppy fur.

It's hard to resist puppy anything.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 01:58 AM

18. ....

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Response to CentralMass (Reply #18)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 04:41 PM

42. I love that scene!

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 01:58 AM

19. Always ask

I usually wait for dogs to come to me if they are interested. In fact I ignore them in case my presence is causing anxiety. I just leave it up to them.

A neighbor had an Akita that ended up having to be put down because he attacked people. She walked him and he was so cute - like a bear - but if you stopped to talked to her, she said don't pet the dog, immediately. You never know a dog's temperament by just looking.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 03:06 AM

20. We have adopted dogs that were strays, and both have been anxious when approached by a stranger

(especially a man). We appreciate it when people ask us if they can pet her; if itís a woman and they approach slowly, I say okay. But if itís a male she doesnít know, I say no and explain why. I just donít know how sheís going to react, and I donít want to risk her biting someone.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 04:07 AM

21. I have worked with dogs most of my life

and knowing each and every one of them have different personalities it is always safe for both parties if permission is asked.

I have a friend who's dog is unpredictable particularly with children and men. We do everything to keep him under control and in a safe distance but we still have people who think it is alright to tell their very young children to go pet the puppy. As we pull him away and walk away we get nasty remarks about how we should not have a dog on the street that a child can not pet. We work very hard at walking were there are no children but there are those times when they are there. We do not ever have problems with the men trying to pet them or get nasty because thay can't pet him.

I also have a huge problem with people who start a conversation or pet a service dog without permission. Some of those dogs are there to keep their person safe and taking their attention off their person can be dangerous for the person. It seems like people are under this idiotic impression that since the dog is inside a public building that means the dog is there to be pet. Leave serice dogs completely alone. Hell, don't even ask to pet a service dog.

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Response to Doreen (Reply #21)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 01:16 PM

35. I agree with you

I had a very unpredictable cattle dog who liked to nip. Small children were a concern. It's best just to admire service dogs from a distance. Only once have I petted a service dog, and that was after I noticed the owner allowing several people to pet his dog.

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Response to Doreen (Reply #21)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 10:43 PM

47. I raised and trained guide dogs.

Never ever pet or ask to pet a guide dog or any service dog for that matter.

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Response to llmart (Reply #47)

Sat Mar 30, 2019, 01:19 AM

53. I hated it when people messed with my service dog.

I must say though that when he had his service band on him he would look away and lean into me to avoid them. I did have a guy tell his daughter when I was in a Subway that you are not supposed to talk to or pet dogs that have service dog bands or harnesses on. I thanked him for teaching his daughter that.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 04:15 AM

22. Never, ever approach an unknown dog without the owner's permission.

If not, it is a great way to be bit or worse.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 04:51 AM

23. Yes

Mainly because I'm fond of my hands and fingers but also to be polite.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 07:42 AM

24. From Petmd:

https://www.petmd.com/dog/wellness/evr_dg_the-best-places-to-pet-your-dog

"How to Pet a Dog

If you are approaching a dog you don't know, avoid hand movements that could look threatening. Commonly, people reach for the top of a dog's head, however, this can seem threatening to the dog because your hand is reaching over the dog's eyes. Petting a dog on the chin or chest is not nearly as threatening, Klein said.

Also, as a safety measure with a strange dog, if you put your fingers behind its jawbone, the dog can't turn and bite as easily. You also should approach the dog with the back of your hand and him sniff it, Klein said. 'You can't grab [a dog] with the back of your hand, and dogs know this,'he said. 'The trick is not to threaten the dog.'

Herron agrees that dogs do best with more of an indirect approach to petting. She recommends asking the dog's human for permission to pet, then turning to the side and crouching down by bending at the knees, instead of bending over at the waist. Let the dog approach you, then place your hand, palm up, on your thigh. If the dog leans in, scratch him under the chin, chest and sides of the neck. If the dog leans in, then petting its back and sides should also be fine, Herron said. And if a dog rolls over and shows you his belly? Don't be fooled. He is not asking for a belly rub, at least not if it's a dog you don't know well.

'Often, dogs roll over when strangers reach out as a sign they are feeling a bit intimidated and need some space,Ē'Herron said."

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 09:19 AM

25. I ALWAYS ask... as the dog may be a working therapy dog and they arent supposed..

..to be petted etc. Also the dog may be blind or hand shy and could startle and nip. Then guess who gets blamed?.......the dog.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 09:29 AM

27. This is especially important for children.

My dog is small and friendly, but I love it when a child first looks at the parent and the parent tells the child to ask permission to pet. Good parent.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 09:30 AM

28. I don't want anyone to touch my dogs without

my permission. I have 2 very friendly German Shepherds, and yes, anyone can pet them as long as they ask.

Itís rude to just walk over to the dogs and start petting them. Hello, thereís a human on the other end of the leash! Do I just ring your door bell, walk into your house and fix myself a sandwich?

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 09:31 AM

29. I stand over the dog and growl very loudly to assert dominance

Just kidding, I often ask the owner, but if the dog approaches me, tail wagging, I usually don't hesitate to pet.

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Response to True Dough (Reply #29)

Sat Mar 30, 2019, 01:33 AM

55. Here is how I picture you dominating a dog



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Response to ProudLib72 (Reply #55)

Sat Mar 30, 2019, 09:08 AM

57. You can't argue

that that's not effective, at least!

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 10:32 AM

30. Asking is good.

I like it when people ask, as my Aussie is pulling towards them and whining to get petted, if it's ok to pet him. Thenn I know to grab one of the rings on the leash that is closer to him so I can control him better and stop him from jumping on someone and possibly hurting them. Finley loves everyone, but not everyone loves dogs, so won't let him go up to strangers unless they ask. I give that same courtesy to others' walking their dogs, I think it's just the polite thing to do.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 11:25 AM

32. Yes

You never know which dog is a nipper and it's just polite. The exception is when a stranger's dog jumps up on me, in a friendly way. Then I probably will pet them.

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Response to TexasBushwhacker (Reply #32)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 01:24 PM

36. One time I made the mistake of encouraging a great dane puppy

This was outside of a restaurant, and the owners were sitting on the patio next to the dog. I saw him as I was leaving and made a bee line to him. He was so happy that he jumped up, put his paws on my shoulders, and began licking my face. The owners watched for a little while before saying, "Ok, dog, down". Not that I really cared, but it was a bad move encouraging a great dane to jump up.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Reply #36)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 06:59 PM

44. Yeah, a GD can knock you over

I was knocked down by my roomie's Great Pyrenees mix a couple of times. Sweet dog but he didn't know his own mass.

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Response to TexasBushwhacker (Reply #44)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 08:31 PM

45. My parents' neighbor owned one of the largest great danes I've ever met

She said he was 175 lbs, and he was still growing. He liked to jump up, put his forepaws on my shoulders, and flea bite on my neck. I could take it, but I'm tall and heavy. If he did that to a smaller person or a child... Luckily, she had trained him not to jump up unless specifically commanded.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 01:55 PM

38. I generally do.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 04:19 PM

40. I asked a dog owner if his dog was nice and could I pet him

and he said yes. I bent down to pet him and he jumped at my face to bite me. Luckily I got away quick enough. Real jerk.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 09:35 PM

46. I always, always, always ask.

I stand several feet away, and ask, ďIs it OK to make friends?Ē And, as recommended in post #24, i extend the back of my hand, not an open palm.

And, I donít ask every dog that I pass by. If the dog is tugging on his/her leash trying to come closer to me, thatís when I ask.

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Response to 3catwoman3 (Reply #46)

Fri Mar 29, 2019, 11:52 PM

48. I'm not as trusting of leashed dogs

They tend to be more anxious and, therefore, unpredictable. I've had a number of leashed dogs seem like they wanted to come up to me but get startled and back away when I bent down to them.

I should have been more clear in my OP. I do realize there is a huge difference between leashed dogs and dogs running freely at the park.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Sat Mar 30, 2019, 12:42 AM

50. It is not about being impolite. It is about safety.

You have no idea of what the dog is like. Some dogs love to be petted by everyone. Others, especially recently rescued dogs, may have a lot of fear. And if a stranger comes up to them, they may bite out of that fear.

Always ask before petting a dog that you do not know.
And if you are given permission to pet the dog, first place your hand, palm up, near the dog's nose, so that the dog can sniff you first. It's their thing, it's what makes them feel comfortable. And it sure beats having them sniff your butt.

All dogs reading this thread will understand that last comment.

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Response to Dem2theMax (Reply #50)

Sat Mar 30, 2019, 01:28 AM

54. My dog is an aggressive butt sniffer

I mean she will shove her nose right up another dog's butt. Should another dog do the same to her, however, boy does she get upset!

I'm thinking of doing something like this to keep her satiated:

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Response to ProudLib72 (Reply #54)

Sat Mar 30, 2019, 01:48 AM

56. I am 'howling' my head off at that photo!

Aren't dogs funny? If they do something it's okay, but if another dog does the same thing to them, look out!

Butt sniffing is a dog's way of reading the newspaper. A dog gets all of his news from smelling another dog's butt.

I think I'm glad I'm not a dog. At least when it comes to greeting others.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Sat Mar 30, 2019, 12:48 AM

51. Never: I don't pet anyone dog.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Sat Mar 30, 2019, 11:26 AM

58. I used to do that when I was younger.

And the dogs always took to me. Now I ask first and I keep my face back until I know I will get kisses. Not all dogs have good owners.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Original post)

Sun Mar 31, 2019, 01:43 PM

59. Always.

ALWAYS ask if it's okay.

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