Police: Teen shot herself in mouth with hands cuffed behind back

Today's entry in the "are you shitting me?" file:

https://idahonews.com/news/nation-world/police-woman-killed-herself-with-gunshot-through-her-mouth-while-hands-cuffed-behind-back?utm_source=taboola&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=internal

I'm suspicious of the "Special Olympics Defunding Gambit"

It feels like Trump is gearing up to do something everyone will hate, like eliminating a popular working-class tax loophole to pay for his wall. To soften the blow, he first announced, then rescinded, a plan to do something even more outrageous..."yeah, I know Schedule A deductions have been reduced to 'contributions to Christian and Jewish churches only, must donate at least 10 percent of your net worth,' but it's all good because President Trump isn't going to eat a puppy on live television anymore."

Everyone's favorite radical state legislator has introduced a bill to abolish abortion

Matt Shea (R, I guess - Spokane Valley, WA) really hates abortion, so he's introduced a bill into the Democratic-controlled Washington legislature to not only abolish abortion, but to charge everyone involved in one with murder.

https://www.khq.com/news/rep-matt-shea-introduces-bill-that-would-abolish-abortion/article_0d2478fc-5023-11e9-9a49-e7d92ef7f8ce.html

British Airways plane lands at wrong airport

What's the difference between Donald Trump and a 50-pound sack of manure?

Three hundred pounds.

Must read: Matt Shea's "Biblical Basis for War"

Matt Shea is a GOP state legislator from Spokane Valley, WA. He's also a dangerous psychopath. He has published a "Biblical Basis for War" which explains what we're dealing with when we're talking about MAGAts.

https://www.documentcloud.org/documents/5026577-Biblical-Basis-for-War.html

I will wait to see the report before gnashing teeth

First: Mueller can’t indict Trump.

Second: it would be best for family indictments to come from the State of New York. Trump can’t pardon those crimes.

Third: I believe Barr will not edit the report. There is too big a chance Mueller could provide a copy from his printer to Congress.

Fourth: if Trump really is a crook, Barr won’t protect him.

I have a perfect new nickname for Donald Trump

Angstrom. After the thickness of his skin. An Angstrom is one ten-billionth of a meter.

Besides measuring the thickness of Donald Trump's hide, it is also used to measure the space between the atoms in whatever elastomer his backbone is made of.

I do believe Paul Manafort is in deep trouble

You know that second sentencing hearing he's going to face this week? Take a guess who the judge is.

https://www.cnbc.com/2019/03/08/paul-manafort-sentence-could-become-a-longer-one-for-trump-campaign-chief.html

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Yes, ladies and gentlemen, Amy Berman "Enough is enough! I have had it with these motherfucking snakes in this motherfucking administration!" Jackson is about to open some fuckin' windows on Ostrich Skin Boy over there.

I found a new gift for your favorite president

Since they don't have fast food where he's going, this book will come in handy:

Creative Snacks, Meals, Beverages and Desserts You Can Make Behind Bars:: A Cookbook for Inmates (and others on a tight budget) looking to put the fun back into food

https://www.amazon.com/Creative-Snacks-Beverages-Desserts-Behind/dp/1482322161/ref=sr_1_1?hvadid=198213108617&hvdev=c&hvlocphy=1016140&hvnetw=g&hvpos=1o1&hvqmt=b&hvrand=3277941510293772495&hvtargid=kwd-297967462245&keywords=food+for+inmates&qid=1552341385&s=gateway&sr=8-1&tag=googhydr-20