Rhiannon12866
Rhiannon12866's JournalTwitter's Servers Burst Into Flames After Attempting to Fact-Check All of Trump's Tweets
SAN FRANCISCO (The Borowitz Report)—Servers belonging to the social-media platform Twitter burst into flames on Thursday, after the company attempted to fact-check all of Donald Trump’s tweets.
“We knew that fact-checking Trump’s tweets was going to put a strain on our system,” Jack Dorsey, the C.E.O. of Twitter, said. “We had no idea that it would result in columns of fire shooting forty feet into the air.”
Reportedly, an explosion in the server fact-checking Trump’s tweets about Joe Scarborough ignited a blaze that quickly spread to a server furiously vetting his tweets about Barack Obama.
Fire trucks rushed to Twitter headquarters to extinguish the inferno, which San Francisco officials called the largest fact-checking-related fire incident in the city’s history.
While no one was injured in the conflagration, Dorsey quietly shelved plans to fact-check all of Donald Trump, Jr.,’s tweets.
Short article, no more at link: 
https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/twitters-servers-burst-into-flames-after-attempting-to-fact-check-all-of-trumps-tweets
Photograph from Getty
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Trump Lashes Out at Spell-Check for Treating Him Unfairly
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Accusing it of treating him “very unfairly,” Donald Trump lashed out on Wednesday at the widely used spelling tool spell-check.
“Almost every time I type a word, spell-check puts a red squiggly line under it,” he tweeted. “It never put a red squiggly line under Obama’s words.”
“Spell-check is rigged against conservatives,” he charged.
Trump accused spell-check of infringing on his First Amendment rights by interfering with what he called “freedom of spelling.”
“Freedom of Spelling is guaranteed by the Conitution,” he wrote.
In his most direct threat to the spelling tool, he warned that, if spell-check did not stop putting red squiggly lines under his words, he would “close it down.”
Trump also said that he was in talks with the Education Secretary, Betsy DeVos, about eliminating spelling altogether.
Short article, no more at link: https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/trump-lashes-out-at-spell-check-for-treating-him-unfairly
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