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sinkingfeeling

Profile Information

Member since: 2003 before July 6th
Number of posts: 40,376

About Me

I reside in Fayetteville, Arkansas. I am female, single, and one year from full retirement. I'm already retired from a 30-year career with IBM. Love my Victorian house built in 1858 and my dogs and cats.

Journal Archives

Just a real life story....

In 1957, I was 9 years old and suddenly there was a major shift in my world. My 43 year old father had a serious heart attack and was told to stop working. My dad was a full time Chevolet parts manager and farmed 225 acres in his spare time.

So, we left Ohio and my rural grade school (class of 18 kids) and headed to Ft. Lauderdale, Florida. There I was appalled by the strange teaching methods I found in my new school where there were 6 fourth grades! We were divided into teams and there were all kinds of point systems.

It was a much different world from the corn fields and woods of Ohio. I saw water fountains and restrooms labeled 'black' and 'white'. There were no African Americans in my school. I saw the shabby 'black' school and the neighborhoods blacks were to live in. I was even called a 'damn Yankee'.

The biggest shock came with participation in my grade school's annual 'minstrel show'. My mother tried to explain what these shows were. I had to learn a bunch of Southern songs and I had one speaking line. I can't recall what my set up for the punchline was, but I had to call out, "Mr. Interlocutor, Mr. Interlocutor!" Then I asked my question and the interlocutor responded, making a joke.
And they covered our faces with black makeup. They left white circles around our mouths and eyes.

As the years passed, I realized how awful all this was. But I don't believe I was given an opportunity to opt out. 3 years later I was back in Ohio and began to support the Civil Rights movement. Been an activist and a Democrat ever since.

People do become enlightened and they can change over time. And what is unacceptable in society also changes with time. That's how we progress.
Posted by sinkingfeeling | Thu Feb 7, 2019, 06:42 PM (9 replies)

Ten years ago today, I woke up from what was to have been minor

surgery to remove a benign lymph node, to be told they had discovered Stage IV cancer on both my tonsils. It was squamous cell carcinoma.
I was shocked as I had had no symptoms at all. I underwent 33 radiation treatments that also destroyed most of my saliva glands and taste buds, covered my throat with blisters, and burnt my neck. Didn't eat for 4 weeks.
But I survived and have been cancer free for TEN years!
Posted by sinkingfeeling | Wed Jan 16, 2019, 09:35 AM (69 replies)

Saw "On the Basis of Sex" today and I was crying like a baby at

the end. This is the story of my lifetime. When women were told who they could be and what they could do.

I was laughed at by the AF ROTC for wanting to join; told I'd be taking a man's place in vet school; worked in a place without a women's restroom; attended a conference where I was one of two women and 300 men; had to have my father co-sign for my first mortgage; and had to change my credit cards to my student husband's name.

And we fought back. I joined NOW, marched and protested, fought for abortion rights, equal pay, and the ERA.

I was so moved by the argument made by Ruth Ginsburg in the movie, I started to cry. And I kept crying as RBG made her cameo appearance.
I wish every college aged person were made to watch this movie. So many don't even believe the conditions women were in less than 50 years ago.
Posted by sinkingfeeling | Sat Jan 12, 2019, 05:39 PM (23 replies)

Oh, the lies we're told! Got this in my natural gas bill this month.



The billing line reads: TaxCuts & JobsAct Adj. $118.87 @ -10.16% 12.08 CR

Now that's so nice until you compare this bill to last year's. The Dielivery Charge for 300 CCF went up from $.3289 to $.453182 this year. If my math is right that's an increase of 37%.

After my 10.16% credit, the delivery cost still was 26.84% higher than last year.

So, how does "Lower taxes lead to a lower cost of delivering energy to our customers..."?
Posted by sinkingfeeling | Thu Dec 20, 2018, 10:41 AM (28 replies)

About girls and women not telling after they're attacked

When I was 15 years old, I went into Columbus to shop on a day we didn't have school. My mom was a secretary for a small insurance company and worked on the 12th. floor of a building housing multiple businesses.

As I was coming back to her office. I stepped into the elevator with a single man. He was probably 40 and dressed in jeans. As the elevator began its climb, he came up behind me and dropped to his knees. He placed one of his hands on each side of my leg and started up under my dress (this was the early "60s). I did not say a word. I shoved him off balance as my hand searched for the elevator buttons. Some how I hit like floor 7 and the doors suddenly opened. I tore out, but didn't even try to enter an office where help might have been. I ran around the corner and started down the stairs. He followed. I was faster and made it to the ground floor. Again, there were people everywhere, but I went out the door and ran up the busy street. He followed me for about two blocks before giving up and turning around.

I never told my parents nor sister nor best friend. I told no one until I told my husband about it 7 years later.

Why? I was ashamed that I tempted a man at age 15? I was ashamed some complete stranger had touched me? I don't know. My mother passed away in 2015 at 96. I'm now 70 and I never told her.
Posted by sinkingfeeling | Mon Sep 17, 2018, 06:40 PM (43 replies)

I had to release my best friend of the last 14 plus years this morning.

Hank came to me as a teenager, about 14 or 15 months old, back in 2004. He was pulled from a shelter in northern Kentucky by an American Eskimo Rescue in Ohio. It was there that he became the BFF of another Eskie, Sugar. It was estimated that Sugar was 10 to 12 months older than Hank.

I found Sugar on Petfinders and was given the opportunity to adopt him. My mom and sister were in Ohio and went by to check him out and discovered the deep bond between Hank and Sugar. I decided to adopt them together.

Sugar lost his right front leg to cancer in 2012. I lost him suddenly the day after Thanksgiving last year.

Hank had lost his hearing and could only see light and blurs. He had a rough attack of vestibular syndrome on Jan. 27th., spent 5 days in hospital and had a CT scan. He recovered fairly well physically, but seemed not to remember anything from his former life. He needed help finding his food and water. I carried him up and down stairs every day. He slept with me every night for over 14 years.

About this time last night, he became unstable on his feet and vomited his dinner. I knew it was another attack of the vestibular syndrome. I rushed him to our emergency clinic where they could start IV fluids and watch him overnight. I picked him up there at 6:30 AM and took him directly to our vet's office. He barely stirred. She said she doubted he could recover again, so I sent him to rejoin Sugar.

I've cried until I don't think I can cry any more. And I keep looking for him. How can I sleep tonight without my Hankie Boo next to me? I loved him. It hurts so much to see them go.


Posted by sinkingfeeling | Wed Sep 12, 2018, 08:48 PM (64 replies)

Here's a lousy photo of my 2018 Fair Cake. Won for 8th. year.



Posted by sinkingfeeling | Sun Aug 26, 2018, 07:19 PM (46 replies)

This sums up the 'Trump GOP' perfectly.

http://www.stonekettle.com/2018/08/zero-sum.html?m=1

"You've heard me say this many times before: Itís not heaven if everybody gets to go.† The best part about Conservative Heaven isnít being up there with Jesus, no, itís gloating at the poor saps burning forever down below. Ha ha HAH. Weíre Saved, fuck you, losers! And that horrible selfish religion shapes everything else. We got ours, our healthcare, our food, our clean water, our homes, our jobs, our retirement, our stock options, our savings, our opportunity, our salvation, so fuck you. The best part of America is that everybody doesnít get to go. Thereís no point in privilege if everybody is privileged. You canít think of yourself as exceptional if†everybody†is exceptional. Thereís no point in being rich if everybody else is rich too. They see liberty and justice and freedom as a zero sum game. If others get more, they are somehow diminished, lessened, cheated of their exalted status and made average.

This is the very core of modern Republicanism where†everything†is for profit, prisons, healthcare, education,†religion, civil rights, equality, justice, liberty, all of it for money. And so long as you get yours, well, then to hell with everybody else because thereís not enough to go around and heaven isnít heaven if everybody gets to go.

These people are almost literally the rich sons of bitches who rowed away from the Titanic in half empty lifeboats as 1500 people drowned in freezing water behind them. Fuck you, losers! I got mine."


Posted by sinkingfeeling | Sun Aug 12, 2018, 07:47 AM (33 replies)

Well, I booked my fall trip to Russia, Estonia, Latvia, Lithuania,

Poland, and the Czech Republic. If Russia invades one of the Baltic states, I'll have a ring side seat.
Posted by sinkingfeeling | Tue Jul 24, 2018, 01:05 PM (5 replies)

NRA can keep its donors totally secret.

Posted by sinkingfeeling | Mon Jul 16, 2018, 09:54 PM (7 replies)
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