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Member since: Thu Oct 21, 2004, 06:06 PM
Number of posts: 22,264

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WORST Scandal Ever - unearthed by Andy Borowitz

Obama Under Fire for Using Free Government Housing

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In the latest scandal to rock the Obama Administration, a leading Republican congressman accused the President today of using his position to obtain free government housing for himself and his family.

According to Rep. Paul Ryan (R-Wisconsin), Mr. Obama “has arrogantly exploited the office of President to gain access to a fifty-five-thousand-square-foot residence that could double as a museum.”

“While the average American is struggling to pay his bills, President Obama is living in a luxury home, adorned with priceless paintings and antiques as far as the eye can see,” Rep. Ryan alleged.

Additionally, the Wisconsin congressman said, the President has availed himself of “sumptuous free meals—breakfast, lunch, and dinner—all on the taxpayer’s nickel.”

“Day after day, he selfishly sucks on Uncle Sam’s teat,” he said.

In keeping with Mr. Obama’s bloated lifestyle as “Superstar-in-Chief,” the congressman added, “The President travels with an entourage of highly trained bodyguards who would put Jay-Z’s posse to shame.”

Drawing a line in the sand, the Republican warned Mr. Obama to cut back on his lavish living arrangements “or face possible impeachment.” “Across America, people are tightening their belts,” Rep. Ryan said. “The President should not be living like a head of state.”


Congress’s Average I.Q. Expected to Rise in 2015 - Borowitz musings on Bachman departure to come

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—The average I.Q. of a member of the House of Representatives is expected to rise sharply in 2015, experts said today.
The experts, who indicated that they were “cautiously optimistic” about the development, said that the gains were most likely to be made in the Midwest.
The expected rise in I.Q. could mean that the average congressperson would have a greater grasp of basic concepts in math and science, including the law of evolution, as well as addition and subtraction.
The last time a branch of the federal government experienced such a significant increase in average I.Q., experts said, was the executive branch in 2009.


Syrian Rebels Urge McCain to Get Over Losing to Obama as reported by Andy Borowitz

SYRIA (The Borowitz Report)

—During a meeting yesterday with Sen. John McCain (R-Arizona), Syrian rebels told the senator that he still seemed “really bitter” about losing the 2008 election to President Obama and advised him to “get over it.”
After meeting with the Arizona senator in the border region near Turkey, a spokesman for the Syrian rebels told reporters that while they appreciated Sen. McCain’s support, “We were kind of uncomfortable with the place it was coming from.”
“It was pretty obvious to me and the other rebels that everything McCain was doing was just to get back at Obama,” the rebel spokesman said. “And we were like, look, that election was five years ago. It’s time to move on.”

Sen. McCain denied that his support of the Syrian rebels had anything to do with a personal vendetta against President Obama, but according to the rebel, “Every time he said ‘Obama,’ a vein in his head kind of bulged out.”

“The man is a simmering cauldron of rage,” the Syrian rebel said. “He needs to turn his anger toward Obama into something more positive. You can’t carry all of that hate around with you forever—it’s not healthy.”

For his part, Sen. McCain said that he was “finished” with the Syrian rebels and would now focus on starting a war with North Korea.


Did I miss anything about a June contest?

I've been out and about and it seems there has not been anything yet. Is that correct?
PuppyBismarck won and gets the honors, as I remember.

I Love New York - a few photos - don't know what to chose. For the last one: Do their Mamas know?

One and three quarter days. 28 hours of walking, subways and looking.
Oh I had such fun!

MOMA: Detail of "Dynamism of a Soccer Player" Umberto Boccioni 1882-1916

"Pressure" by American Artist Robert Longo born 1953

I wandered up to the guards: "What is special about this building?" I found out!

Times Square

Saw this on a car today - late, yes - but wit doesn't get old that fast

Spending a couple of hours seeing each other again. Handmade and me in Vermont.

Here she is in the middle of an amount of land that is hers that makes me happy and envious

and holding a lens that evokes similar emotion

then I begged her to stop at the side of the road so I could take a potential photo for "spring"

I'm reporting about an oh so happy encounter with a real live DUer and a potential friend for life thanks to this website.

A fun photo, you decide if I took it, or if I posed

This is in a visitor center parking lot in Vermont.
The owner was from Quebec, and I felt fancy how she pronounced her service dog's name.

I sent an email to Handmade34, the only person I know in Vermont, and told her where I'm going and asked where that is in relation to where she is.

A very few miles. Seems like less than 10.

Guess who I'm seeing tomorrow at noon?

I'm so excited.

Esoteric stuff - while I'm pondering how to show others

My trip is weird. I'm in the hinterland of the glory of New England spring - in lots of locations where regular, trained folk take care of people with developmental problems of all kinds and all kind of severity. The situations are either facilities with many buildings / schools / programs - or homes where there are community living arrangements. Some are young, some are all ages, some are at death's door.

I am maybe going to make a thread of some of them showing me what they are doing just showing their hands. Later.
Now I'm in a Roadway Inn too tired to think, we still have 5 days of touring left and it's strenuous.

These are a few shots from the periphery for the heck of it...
A back alley in Great Barrington, Mass. Steps and walkway. I would NEVER be on them.

In a home I saw this poster of Johnny Cash

The folks you can spy in the top had a meeting I did not need to be in, so I laid down in the "tulips" and took a nap

One of the many looms I've seen


For Johnny Noshoes - though it does not prove

that I was thinking about you
as I was terrified in NYC traffic yesterday (having had no idea the GPS thing would take me through Manhattan)
and after coming out unscathed physically my battered emotions were very grateful for what I got to see after many years of not having visited NYCity.

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