HomeLatest ThreadsGreatest ThreadsForums & GroupsMy SubscriptionsMy Posts
DU Home » Latest Threads » Arkansas Granny » Journal
Page: « Prev 1 2 3 4 5 6 Next »

Arkansas Granny

Profile Information

Gender: Female
Hometown: Arkansas
Home country: USA
Member since: Thu Jan 13, 2005, 04:13 PM
Number of posts: 29,878

Journal Archives

The Onion can apparently predict the future. 3/25/20 edition.

Man Just Buying One Of Every Cleaning Product In Case Trump Announces It’s Coronavirus Cure

EVANSTON, WY—Throwing bottles of bleach, ammonia, and Drano into a cart at his local grocery store, area man Troy Mitchell was reportedly stocking up on one of every cleaning product he could find Wednesday in case President Donald Trump announces it is a coronavirus cure. “I got toilet bowl cleaner, carpet cleaner, Swiffer WetJet refills—you name it—just so me and my family will be ready if the president announces one of these things can treat Chinese virus,” said Mitchell, indiscriminately throwing containers of laundry detergent, Scrubbing Bubbles, grout whitener, steel wool, Febreze, Tilex mold and mildew remover, and laptop screen wipes into the cart, the contents of which rang up to $2,513.67 at checkout. “I’m not getting caught without some oven degreaser should Trump say it’s going to save us, so I better go ahead and grab me a bottle. After this, I’m hitting the hardware store to pick up a 5-gallon bucket of roof sealant to make sure I’m prepared in the event that turns out to be what gets rid of the Wuhan. Could just be 10 or 20 squirts of Windex into each nostril. You never know what might work in a pinch!” At press time, neighbors confirmed Mitchell had been found unresponsive on the floor of his bathroom with several empty aerosol cans of Rust-Oleum wax-and-tar-removing solvent by his head.

Posted by Arkansas Granny | Fri Apr 24, 2020, 12:27 PM (9 replies)

Coming to a store near you.


Posted by Arkansas Granny | Fri Apr 24, 2020, 11:41 AM (3 replies)

How to medical.


Posted by Arkansas Granny | Fri Apr 24, 2020, 09:32 AM (1 replies)

Trump unveils new corona cure.


Posted by Arkansas Granny | Thu Apr 23, 2020, 10:15 PM (5 replies)

I want one of these.


Posted by Arkansas Granny | Thu Apr 23, 2020, 01:39 PM (5 replies)

It's difficult to comprehend stupidity on this level.


Gov. Mike Huckabee

Georgia opening hair salons and tattoo parlors Friday. I’m driving to GA this weekend to get a haircut and tattoo!

8:15 AM - Apr 22, 2020
Twitter Ads info and privacy
7,339 people are talking about this

Posted by Arkansas Granny | Wed Apr 22, 2020, 01:01 PM (26 replies)

A tongue-in-cheek observation.


Posted by Arkansas Granny | Wed Apr 22, 2020, 12:50 PM (1 replies)

A chilling account of immigrant women in detention.


The Women Asked ICE for Soap. They Got Pepper-Sprayed Instead.

On March 25, Jennifer Avalos Barrios, a 24-year-old from Guatemala with two young boys in California, made a panicked call to her sister from an immigration detention center in Jena, Louisiana. “Call my lawyer,” she said, “and tell her I’m suffocating.”

Marlene Seo, a 47-year-old who’s lived in the United States since she was 3, sent texts. “Alex,” she wrote to her daughter through an app, “they just sprayed pepper spray in here and everyone is practically dying from coughing we can’t breathe!!!” The next message was one word: “help!!!”

That morning, officials from GEO Group at Immigration and Customs Enforcement’s LaSalle detention center had assured Avalos Barrios, Seo, and their dorm mates that they were safe from the new coronavirus. Things went awry, and soon 79 women found themselves trapped in a room filled with pepper spray. They were coughing, fainting, crying out for help. It was an hour or so before they got out, Avalos Barrios later told her lawyer, Mariel Villarreal.

I’ve spoken to Avalos Barrios, five dorm mates, a woman who watched things unfold from a neighboring dorm, and many of their loved ones. Most are using their real names, a courageous decision at a time when GEO Group is retaliating against people who speak to the media.
Posted by Arkansas Granny | Wed Apr 22, 2020, 10:29 AM (8 replies)

This is a great explanation of the spread and mortality of Covid-19.


Posted by Arkansas Granny | Mon Apr 20, 2020, 11:18 PM (9 replies)

Excellent Biden campaign ad. I hope it airs widely.



Posted by Arkansas Granny | Sun Apr 19, 2020, 12:06 PM (6 replies)
Go to Page: « Prev 1 2 3 4 5 6 Next »