I really may never understand this. My conscious mind said that everything was fine. Hillary would win. My vote was part of Hillary's insurance in Michigan and all would be as we here had envisioned. But something in my gut knew otherwise.
I don't know why my feelings knew when my head didn't but I remember being quite nervous about watching the returns. Even not turning on the TV until a little after 8pm dreading what that little voice of concern was telling me, and, in a sense, delaying what my emotions seemed to know was inevitable.
My mind settled a bit as the first returns looked normal though tilted a little more red than I had anticipated. The feeling of dread even subsided a bit as Virginia and the East coast seemed to be coming in blue as expected. I looked forward to the election viewing ending in about an hour, early enough for me to get a good night's sleep before teaching Wednesday.
Then it started... I began to realize that Florida was falling red and then the real punch - Michigan was looking too red for comfort. I texted my daughter (who now lives in Minnesota) with the message that we were "in trouble in Michigan" and it has been downhill from there. I didn't sleep at all that night. I taught my classes through a cloud of deep depression on a shoestring of energy.
How did my feelings know there was trouble while my mind insisted that there was not? What was that all about? Anyone have any ideas? My dad says it was our "collective unconscious." I've never held that view as I'm educated as a physicist. But I really don't understand why I was so anxious November 8th before any indication of trouble. What did I know that I didn't know that I knew?
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