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JMCKUSICK

JMCKUSICK's Journal
JMCKUSICK's Journal
June 10, 2024

The Soul of a Tear (For My Snuggles)


The Soul of a Tear 6-10-24

I shed some tears again, just the other day,
I'm trying to share what it had to say.

The source was the loss, of my beautiful Snuggles,
in their full volume, they've created puddles.

Like a pond, ocean, or my favorite lake,
each drop carries memories, of joy or a bad mistake.

From the day we met, each brick in our bond,
all your uniqueness, made me grow more fond.

Each second of joy, every special event,
gave soul to each tear, no need to repent.

The day a year later, you went to a farm,
I missed you each day, praying you'd came to no harm.

Each time I'd come visit, you met me with joy,
so visibly happy, you were never coy.

Each day you were gone, somewhere deep in my heart,
I knew that some day , we'd no longer be apart.

Each day when I'd walk, I'd call your name to the air,
believing for sure, your soul would hear.

Like a prayer answered, I came one day in the car,
knowing that evermore, neither of us would again be far.

The next six months, daily, such joy I never knew,
Each day was a treasure, my adventure with you.

Each new moment treasured, until the fifth of May,
when I found you lifeless, in our driveway.

An ocean of tears, flowing unabated,
the bill came due, the price was fated.

So as I write this, for a cat held so dear,
our whole life together, held in the soul of each tear.

I love you Snuggles,
Your dad.

P.S.
Written at the blind encouragement of Kim, a member of the priesthood at the LDS church I've started to reconnect with after almost 40 years. Thank you.









June 6, 2024

This is who Trump is.

Why is it that people keep assuming that tfg responds the way we would under similar circumstances?
Trump Is a narcissist and psychopath period, full stop.
He was escalating his rhetoric long before his conviction and if anything, he's kicked himself again and again for not going full boar autocrat when he had his chance. If he regrets anything, it's that he was dumb enough to listen to all the people who told him he couldn't do this or that whole president.
He doesn't feel remorse or regret and certainly not fear. I'm almost certain that he believes he's getting out of all of this with help from the Supremes and reelection.
The single biggest mistake that we continue to make over and over and over is that we compare him to a normal functioning human being when he is not.
The press should have a disclaimer with any and all articles they write stating that this is what he said, but he lies like we drink water.
If anything, we should be running ads that repeat his top ten most ridiculous lies again and again.
By treating him as normal, we dismiss how dangerous he is, has been and will continue to be to each person in this world.
Stop Stop Stop Stop Stop giving this mans words oxygen.
He has stolen, lied, manipulated, cheated, abused, everyone, and every situation he has ever come across. No remorse, no regrets, and no change.
Why isn't anyone running ads of people he's cheated in his dealings and the effects it had on their personal and professional lives?

June 6, 2024

This is who Trump is

Why is it that people keep assuming that tfg responds the way we would under similar circumstances?
Trump Is a narcissist and psychopath period, full stop.
He was escalating his rhetoric long before his conviction and if anything, he's kicked himself again and again for not going full boar autocrat when he had his chance. If he regrets anything, it's that he was dumb enough to listen to all the people who told him he couldn't do this or that whole president.
He doesn't feel remorse or regret and certainly not fear. I'm almost certain that he believes he's getting out of all of this with help from the Supremes and reelection.
The single biggest mistake that we continue to make over and over and over is that we compare him to a normal functioning human being when he is not.
The press should have a disclaimer with any and all articles they write stating that this is what he said, but he lies like we drink water.
If anything, we should be running ads that repeat his top ten most ridiculous lies again and again.
By treating him as normal, we dismiss how dangerous he is, has been and will continue to be to each person in this world.
Stop Stop Stop Stop Stop giving this mans words oxygen.
He has stolen, lied, manipulated, cheated, abused, everyone, and every situation he has ever come across. No remorse, no regrets, and no change.
Why isn't anyone running ads of people he's cheated in his dealings and the effects it had on their personal and professional lives?

May 31, 2024

I think it's a crime

That it's taken more than a month to decide that tfg doesn't have immunity.

May 30, 2024

I came to America on July 4th, 1976.

I've always held an idealistic awe of the Presidency including believing that Clinton should have been convicted in his impeachment.
I'm really sad that we elected the man in the first place, knowing with absolute certainty that he was a criminal long before he ran.
I'm thrilled that all his efforts to wreck our system of justice with a full frontal assault failed.
Rachel Maddow just said our job as Americans starts today. We need to support our grand juries, our jurors, our entire criminal justice system like our freedoms depend on it.
Chalk one up for our ideals.

May 22, 2024

Latest Polling data has Biden -17 popularity

I wonder if any of these pollsters ever bother to ask WHY?
It just doesn't make sense. I guess the next thing Democrats are going to discover is that he's that unpopular due to people being inundated with negative coverage in MSM, and down right programming on the right.
It's incredibly hard to dent a flood of disinformation with a monthly great news report that gets a day of Airtime at best.
I'm not sure how we can overcome that.

May 19, 2024

How far we've fallen

The most ridiculous thing coming out of this Alito story is that nobody is insisting he resign.
He has ruled on numerous issues in the past 3 and a half years that involved the very government that he supported to be overthrown.
That's what the flag represents on his house. All the rest is hot air.
He needs to go yesterday!!

May 6, 2024

A heartfelt Thank you.

First and foremost I just want to say thank you for the amazing empathy and love you all offered in my loss of my Snuggles. The kind words, hugs and prayers have helped me begin to transition from the grief I still feel to a wonderful memorabration which I will luxuriously bathe in as all my wonderful memories of my Snuggles wash over me.
We placed her body in a wooded area that is separated from me by road she died on. It allows her to go back to Mother Earth, and I will visit her every day and hug her spirit, soothe her as my voice so often did, share my days with her, and encourage her journey, whatever that may entail.
You all have, with you words, helped broaden my horizons in coping with Snuggles death. For that, I am beyond grateful and can only hope to repay you all when the opportunity arises.
Thank you and hugs back to all of you.

May 5, 2024

A prayer for my Snuggles as she crosses the Rainbow Bridge

My Snuggles crossed the Rainbow Bridge yesterday.
She chose me to be her dad 3 years ago, her and her brother Cuddles, as they decided to enter our lives indirectly through the USPS.
My then girlfriend is a mail carrier and this was clearly a special delivery directly to my heart. Snuggles chose me from our very first encounter as she came right to me and told me what to call her by curling up in my lap right away. Her brother attached himself to her son and he was almost as cuddly as she was snuggly so the naming took care of itself.
Snuggles was at my side from that day forth. If I went to the bathroom, she had to make sure I was ok by supervising. If I went for a walk, she had to come along and by the time she was six months old or so, she was one of four kitties in tow as I became the crazy cat dude in our neighborhood. Snuggles had a combination of food insecurity along with general anxiety, she was probably the runt of the litter. Snuggles struggled with all the other kitties so we found a home for her as a barn cat on an 80 acre farm where she didn't have to be so anxious.
She never left my heart and I missed her constantly. Every couple of months we'd go to a town near her for a shopping trip so we'd stop so I could visit her. Snuggles always came running when I'd call her when we visited and that made me miss her all the more. We'd spend 10-15 minutes snuggling, ohhh she loved those visits. Every time it came time to leave her, I would be reduced to a blubbering fool as we drove away. I always told my roommate that if I could find a way, I'd have her back in a heartbeat.
Whenever I walked the other kitties, Mufasa, Nuggett, and Cuddles, I'd always call for Suggles along with their names as a small gesture to honor her place in my heart. In an effort to keep this short (lol), a small miracle happened as my g/f and I decided we are better as friends so I moved but stayed in the same town. Her son is my roommate so we had Cuddles and low and behold if the folks who took her in, called out of the blue and asked if I could take her back as she was not getting along with their other cat.
I was overjoyed and we got her the very next day in early December. I couldn't have asked for a better Christmas present and Snuggles seemed thrilled to be reunited. Every minute that she spent in the house from then on was at my literal side. She became more like a small dog in her mannerisms. She loved being doted on, loved being held for 60 seconds at a time, and slept at my side every night and laid at my feet all through the day. The only thing she wouldn't do anymore is get on my lap.
Almost five months to the day that I brought her home, she was hit by a car and it looks like she died instantly. I have been home from my back surgery for 5 days and so I'm still unable to bend, lift, or twist for another couple of months, so I had my roomie pick you up and place you in my lap so I could hold you and I so fervently prayed to a higher power that you aren't alone right now. Oh God, please hold Snuggles close, give her soul peace and please find her soulful companions to help her on her journey to the beyond.
Thank you Snuggles for filling my heart with smiles, with treasures of moments that we shared and that I can only hope sustain you as they must me.
Thank you Snuggles for being overjoyed at the sound of me calling you, bouncing as you ran toward me like a silly rabbit.
Thank you Snuggles for every day reminding me that Love is above all other things that we should seek and offer., Your love was so unconditional, so joyful, so warm, so comforting, so visible, so encouraging, so empowering, for both of us.
Thank you Snuggles for being a Chosen Cat, a cat with such special gifts that you were destined to serve me with, to save me with, to caress me with, to share my journey with and I pray that I earned everything you gave and please forgive when if I failed you.
So Thank You Snuggles, for saving a lost soul, for you see, I have been a wandering tumbleweed my whole life and you were that oh so special and important water source that allowed me to set temporary roots so I could bloom and flower for these three years in a place that my heart will always remember as a temporary haven that I could call home for my lost soul. See, you saved my life at the cost of yours and you gave me hope, purpose and most importantly a safe place with whom I could simple Be.
Good Bye my Snugglebug, my Snugglebunny, my Snugglepuppy, good bye Pretty Girl, good bye my Sweet Angel, good bye SweetPea, good bye Baby Girl, good bye my Sweet Princess.
I'll Miss you so much, and know I've loved you every moment you have been in my life and I will always love and cherish the very special friend you are.

Dear God,
First, accept my undying gratitude for letting me find my Snuggles so we could both not suffer alone.
Please let Snuggles hear my words, and feel my feelings, and let my tears offer any nourishment she may need as they are entirely tears of gratitude for the countless moments she blessed me with, please don't let her be lonely at any step on her next journey, and please let her have Peace, fullness, and safety as Snuggles has earned no less. Please take care of her. I love you Snuggles.
Amen

April 24, 2024

I'm having major back surgery tomorrow

And I would love any positive vibes, energy, thoughts or prayers to help me through these next two months especially.
This will be my fourth operation on my lumbar spine since September of '21.
The system doesn't make things easy if you're poor, Medicaid ran me around with denials since last fall and I just got the final approval Monday.
I love the DU members, they're valuable opinions, the vast knowledge I've gained here and your forgiveness and instruction with my occasional demonstrations of naivety or ignorance. You all have been my source for news, laughs, tears, and every other emotion imaginable.

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