General Discussion
In reply to the discussion: 86'd on Christmas Day by (ex) boyfriend [View all]Caliman73
(11,726 posts)It is always difficult to navigate family relationships. You never know the depths of the connection or the dysfunction within the system. I am curious about your first statement. You said you dated 40 years ago, 20 years ago, and then for the last 2 years. Just curious as to what happened the first time around, how you got together 20 years later, what ended that round, and then why the third time in 2016?
There is tension with my family of origin and my wife though not because of political beliefs, more personal issues, however, it is difficult to navigate sometimes. My wife is wonderful and supportive, but has a difficult time relating to my sister, who is also wonderful, but has a very strong personality. I wish that they got a long better because I feel caught in the middle, however, I always support my wife in public and then talk to her in private about the situation. It can create conflict.
It hurts when we lose a relationship that we find rewarding, but I think that you need to remember that when we date seriously or marry, we are eventually having to allow the family of our partner into our lives and there will be times when our values conflict with where the partner came from. It is always difficult to have people choose between their family and their romantic relationship. Ultimately however, if your partner was not supportive, given your history, it might be best to move on. Good luck.