General Discussion

xfundy

(5,105 posts)

4. "True Christian" always needs a ™!

Sat Sep 22, 2012, 01:07 AM

Sep 2012

Always! True Christians™ are making mint off rubes, and those other religions eat into their market share! Then, among True Christians™, some are Truer Christians™ than others. True Christians™ still hate Catolicks, Mor(m)ons, etc., and still talk at the Sunday dinner table about how all other denominations (i.e., non-Southern Batshits) are gonna BURN. I grew up in that twisted environment,and nothing has really changed. They've all tried to come together to present a united front, but it's only for show, and IF and WHEN a "True Christian™" ever gets in charge, they will demand all the infidels either accept their mythology or die (though maybe it might just be deportation at first).

All over an invisible man.

Would be laughable if not so tragically close by.

Edit history

Please sign in to view edit histories.

Recommendations

0 members have recommended this reply (displayed in chronological order):

152 replies

= new reply since forum marked as read

Highlight:

I suspect this guy does not have a girlfriend and never will [View all] Quixote1818 Sep 2012 OP

And, I believe, his shirt says, "A TRUE CHRISTIAN" in caps lock NBachers Sep 2012 #1

"True Christian" always needs a ™! xfundy Sep 2012 #4

Yep, a "Real Christian!" And Trademarked too! Wonder if he's also a "Real American," and a RKP5637 Sep 2012 #84

he should check my middle finger for details. roguevalley Sep 2012 #44

Maybe they were out of the "FAKE CHRISTIAN" shirts that day? Whovian Sep 2012 #119

What a hunk! xfundy Sep 2012 #2

Ham? nt ballabosh Sep 2012 #37

The body is a temple of GOD DiverDave Sep 2012 #141

A blob? Rosa Luxemburg Sep 2012 #140

lol at his shirt OriginalGeek Sep 2012 #3

AMEN and GLORY! xfundy Sep 2012 #5

I know RIGHT!? OriginalGeek Sep 2012 #69

The school I went to would tell him he is going to Hell Jamastiene Sep 2012 #102

Looks like Nugent's really let himself go.... SunSeeker Sep 2012 #6

+1000 orpupilofnature57 Sep 2012 #77

lol SammyWinstonJack Sep 2012 #109

LOL 47of74 Sep 2012 #143

His shirt should actually read "I am anti progress". Initech Sep 2012 #7

I thought #6 said "Mostly Depressed" lol Tigress DEM Sep 2012 #8

That adequately describes the "True Christian Woman". undeterred Sep 2012 #68

Whoa. That's a guy? Indpndnt Sep 2012 #9

Have a hug, dude Mopar151 Sep 2012 #48

... Jamastiene Sep 2012 #103

Isn't all that stuff plagiarized? Zambero Sep 2012 #10

I think I'm in love. Marie Marie Sep 2012 #11

Nope, but I can get you the name of a good therapist tavalon Sep 2012 #53

Where/when was this fantasmic display of mantilect? Care Acutely Sep 2012 #12

Almost TWO AND A HALF TONS of pr0n? TheMightyFavog Sep 2012 #92

What, did someone weigh it? 47of74 Sep 2012 #95

Yes, they weighed it at the local recycling center (I suspect partly for fun) and sent it Care Acutely Sep 2012 #135

i suspect you are correct .... marasinghe Sep 2012 #13

or maybe the girlfriend is a blow-up plastic doll. iemitsu Sep 2012 #34

agree with you, absolutely. marasinghe Sep 2012 #41

well, you can't control everything. iemitsu Sep 2012 #50

LOL Angry Dragon Sep 2012 #42

Blow-up doll left him and took the flatscreen. Darth_Kitten Sep 2012 #65

because she brought the flatscreen to the relationship. iemitsu Sep 2012 #85

Impressive. Darth_Kitten Sep 2012 #115

"True Christians" tarheelsunc Sep 2012 #14

That's called a "no true scotsman" fallacy. D23MIURG23 Sep 2012 #75

Bet he does. n/t jtuck004 Sep 2012 #15

He does so have a girlfriend! Here is her picture: Arugula Latte Sep 2012 #16

LOL. And his on the box. bluesbassman Sep 2012 #17

Okay... I am going to out myself as a total sexual rube here Sen. Walter Sobchak Sep 2012 #56

There are entire sections of web sites devoted to videos of guys Jamastiene Sep 2012 #105

sounds like fucking a waterwing Sen. Walter Sobchak Sep 2012 #113

I'm sure there is video of that out there. Jamastiene Sep 2012 #148

I really could've gone my whole life cyglet Sep 2012 #124

I could have too, but Jamastiene Sep 2012 #146

I'm sorry, ma'm, but that information is on a need-to-know basis... JHB Sep 2012 #138

You see, when a man and a plastic balloon love each other ... Kennah Sep 2012 #137

... Jamastiene Sep 2012 #147

wow, mr macho snagged himself an airline stewardess. iemitsu Sep 2012 #88

"Note to self: making love to blow up doll not as good as advertised." Initech Sep 2012 #123

Titus 2..... busterbrown Sep 2012 #18

Koch head sign holder.... midnight Sep 2012 #19

Are you sure that's a guy? jberryhill Sep 2012 #20

I was thinking the same thing blogslut Sep 2012 #125

Too bad that existentialist Sep 2012 #21

I don't understand? DemKittyNC Sep 2012 #22

Would you do it for a.. Confusious Sep 2012 #35

Duct Tape Brazilian? formercia Sep 2012 #106

LOL PD Turk Sep 2012 #23

hahaha! DemKittyNC Sep 2012 #26

yeah I love her PD Turk Sep 2012 #28

I think I do too! 47of74 Sep 2012 #97

Ha! Too funny KT2000 Sep 2012 #31

He'd probably prefer a hawt chick with a strap-on. kestrel91316 Sep 2012 #98

I Douchebag, 24:7 - "Let there be sammiches." chollybocker Sep 2012 #24

Ack! Amaril Sep 2012 #129

What, exactly, BEGS for such a sign? HughBeaumont Sep 2012 #25

yep, my guess is that he adopted the anti-woman stance iemitsu Sep 2012 #91

re:I suspect this guy does not have a girlfriend and never will allan01 Sep 2012 #27

A TRUE ASSHOLE. N/T FourScore Sep 2012 #29

They don't have to cook? TreasonousBastard Sep 2012 #30

Mr. Twinkie short of a ton is such a catch... WCGreen Sep 2012 #32

What he lacks in social graces, he makes up for in physical ugliness. Marr Sep 2012 #33

I wonder where I can get a AsahinaKimi Sep 2012 #36

..and a Mullet shall lead them.. IrishAle Sep 2012 #38

he's a hunk a hunk musette_sf Sep 2012 #39

Troubling that the sign looks mass produced. The country is doomed, damn those morons. freshwest Sep 2012 #40

True DemKittyNC Sep 2012 #43

It is spelled right. Jamastiene Sep 2012 #107

his girlfriend is Rosie Palm BadGimp Sep 2012 #45

It's times like this that I'm glad I'm not a woman. Spitfire of ATJ Sep 2012 #46

Gee, thanks DemKittyNC Sep 2012 #47

See? I'm worth a read now and then. Spitfire of ATJ Sep 2012 #49

Trust me, that ugly visual never came into my mind tavalon Sep 2012 #54

"Praise the Lord and pass the cheesburgers" came to my mind. Spitfire of ATJ Sep 2012 #55

I'm thinking.... lexw Sep 2012 #51

Sleep well tonight. The gene pool is a little bit safer. nt Buns_of_Fire Sep 2012 #52

Nice sources - all forgeries intaglio Sep 2012 #57

Let me play Match Maker mick063 Sep 2012 #58

She was annoying as hell! Here is another one he might actually get Quixote1818 Sep 2012 #96

Are you sure that's a guy? Matariki Sep 2012 #59

Yup. Lucinda Sep 2012 #62

She needs to discover the BDSM community.... BlancheSplanchnik Sep 2012 #110

Haha, I'll tell you a secret Matariki Sep 2012 #150

really? HAHAHAHHAH, that's hilarious!!!!!! You got it right, BlancheSplanchnik Sep 2012 #152

It's probably also his Christian Mingle profile. qb Sep 2012 #60

Even Christians no longer live like that treestar Sep 2012 #61

Actually, most fundies mzteris Sep 2012 #63

Yep, and all he needs to do is go to one of their churches to find girlfriends. stevenleser Sep 2012 #70

Wisconsin Synod is notorious for this... TheMightyFavog Sep 2012 #94

Nice 47of74 Sep 2012 #100

I live in WI now, mzteris Sep 2012 #118

Hey, sit and spin on it, boy. Darth_Kitten Sep 2012 #64

He needs to move to Saudi Arabia. GoCubsGo Sep 2012 #66

Let me know where he is with that sign. MineralMan Sep 2012 #67

His mother must be so proud. TahitiNut Sep 2012 #71

Proverbs 23:21 ... Robb Sep 2012 #72

I'd agree, based on his looks. But as for the sign, you'd be surprised how many religious women Honeycombe8 Sep 2012 #73

Any takers, ladies? TwilightGardener Sep 2012 #74

The book of Peter.... Where else.... nt Xipe Totec Sep 2012 #76

This is what religious subsidies by the govt give us. valerief Sep 2012 #78

Gee, it's in the bible, so we all gotta do it - what a F'en fool ... RKP5637 Sep 2012 #79

Jesus is so lucky to have him! nt SDjack Sep 2012 #80

I wish we had a time machine so jerks like this could go live in RKP5637 Sep 2012 #81

... nor a boyfriend! n/t RKP5637 Sep 2012 #82

Proverbs 23:2 aandegoons Sep 2012 #83

It just stuns me that in this day and age, in this country, there are such backward people. n/t Fla Dem Sep 2012 #86

Are you sure that is a guy? Zax2me Sep 2012 #87

Well, duh gleannfia Sep 2012 #89

Did he leave his club and spear back at the cave? PA Democrat Sep 2012 #90

And it's prboably been years since he's seen his only willie! 47of74 Sep 2012 #93

what an a**hole blueamy66 Sep 2012 #99

Good gawd. lonestarnot Sep 2012 #101

Oooh, that guy will turn me straight. Alduin Sep 2012 #104

Hubba, hubba... StarryNite Sep 2012 #108

Don't be so sure. former9thward Sep 2012 #111

I've sent a message to the Duchess... 47of74 Sep 2012 #112

Yuk. City Lights Sep 2012 #114

Wow! He must have women lined up at the door. sarcasmo Sep 2012 #116

I'm betting he's a comedian! sabrina 1 Sep 2012 #117

And he should go on a diet and get a haircut! flyguyjake Sep 2012 #120

I REALLY think that's a woman... YellowRubberDuckie Sep 2012 #121

Most women don't cut their sideburns like that Oilwellian Sep 2012 #127

Men don't keep their nails like that... YellowRubberDuckie Sep 2012 #131

It's Pat? KG Sep 2012 #130

Is he a translater for the Taliban? JoePhilly Sep 2012 #122

Well there's always a hand Bluzmann57 Sep 2012 #126

Standard Mormon doctrine? L0oniX Sep 2012 #128

Not unless he kidnaps one and keeps her tied up in the basement. n/t Cleita Sep 2012 #132

No wonder he is huge. Holding up that sign was the most work he has done in his life. appleannie1 Sep 2012 #133

It would be difficult to respect any woman The Doctor. Sep 2012 #134

Oooh, he looks like quite a catch! distantearlywarning Sep 2012 #136

Lol, yes they probably are... 47of74 Sep 2012 #142

Isn't this Willard Rmoney's specialist in charge of overcoming the candidate's gender gap? Guy Montag Sep 2012 #139

Seen on FB HillWilliam Sep 2012 #144

All I have to say is even Hitler had a girlfriend. aikoaiko Sep 2012 #145

OMG, first glance I thought that was my sister-in-law revolution breeze Sep 2012 #149

A looker like him? You don't think he'll ever find a woman? bulloney Sep 2012 #151