Within and under the question is a deeper truth about the human condition.

Why do people confuse/ conflate the 'self' with 'non-self'?
Why is it so hard to understand the beam and mote?

The 'self' is objectively this "body-mind-sense-complex with a name and a story.
No good comes when the truth-value-worth of this 'self' falsely becomes subjectively mixed-up with objectively other selves.

We all understand human-subjectivity and tolerate (or try to avoid) those with out of-bounds subjectivity (partly cultural/social boundaries). Those whose subjectivity is too-far-out are not tolerated (prisons, mental hospitals, shunning, exile).

Now, if we could only teach our kids the truth about their "self', they would all grow up saintly without the need/desire for crushing others to feel good themselves.