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In reply to the discussion: My Wife's Friend of 55+ Years... [View all]Warpy
(113,131 posts)For the last 3 years of her life, my mother complained bitterly that her mother hadn't contacted her. She knew her mother had been dead for n early 50 years at that point but she kept expecting a visit. Whatever happens in our brains as we start to get close to death is strange for the observers but it's extremely comforting for the dying.
Often people come to them in their dreams, but occasionally it happens when they're awake. No, it's not exactly hallucination, it's not the drugs, but it's very, very common. Something lovely and protective takes over when people are close to the end.
I don't know if my grandmother ever turned up, my mother's last weeks were non verbal ones. I have to hope both her parents did, her dad healthy, sober and nonviolent for once. She did die without fear of judgment or hell.
So hold her hand and listen to anything she has to tell you and don't worry that she's going crazy. She's not, death is often like that.
(Old retired RN here, and I've seen a lot of dying and death)
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