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jmowreader

(50,553 posts)

41. Not much of a man, if you ask me

Tue Feb 2, 2021, 12:20 AM

Feb 2021

Let me get this straight: the hero of this story owns no hacksaw, no Sawzall, no bolt cutters, no tin snips and no angle grinder. I'm sitting here in the middle of my house counting, and if someone had locked my man-parts in a cage and was demanding a thousand dollars to let them free, I've got at least eight items within arm's reach that could get that off for no money.

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54 replies

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Highlight:

Hackers Hold Man's Penis For Ransom In Digital Chastity Belt, Demand Bitcoin To Unlock [View all] MicaelS Feb 2021 OP

If this story is for real, what is his penis doing in a cage in the first place? Irish_Dem Feb 2021 #1

Obviously his partner wanted him to remain faithful.n/t MicaelS Feb 2021 #2

Why is it connected to the internet? Irish_Dem Feb 2021 #8

I would assume the "kinky sex" bit... regnaD kciN Feb 2021 #11

A safe word usually means S and M? Irish_Dem Feb 2021 #13

Probably so she can release the cage remotely, happybird Feb 2021 #19

I don't see how that would be sexually exciting for a male? Irish_Dem Feb 2021 #21

It's a kink thing. happybird Feb 2021 #22

Ok got it. Thanks. Makes sense from an S and M standpoint. nt Irish_Dem Feb 2021 #23

I heard about this on a podcast-- it's a BDSM thing. dawg day Feb 2021 #29

Right, doesn't even make a lot of sense. But whatever rocks their boat. Irish_Dem Feb 2021 #30

Yeah, it's all backwards when someone gets off on pain and humiliation- dawg day Feb 2021 #32

Victimization and powerless too. Irish_Dem Feb 2021 #33

that is the part I do not get Skittles Feb 2021 #47

Someone posted that his partner can control the cage when she is out of town via the internet. Irish_Dem Feb 2021 #49

um ok gonna google that device cuz wtf? samnsara Feb 2021 #3

...and all google gave me were links to that guys story ;/ samnsara Feb 2021 #6

What the actual F? Penis in a cage? Seriously? Connected to the Internet? Hacked? I may never stop lettucebe Feb 2021 #4

Why would anybody do that in the first place? The Velveteen Ocelot Feb 2021 #5

This seems waaaaaay beyond... 3catwoman3 Feb 2021 #36

I wish I had shorted this company! Beakybird Feb 2021 #7

For $500 and some beer... ret5hd Feb 2021 #9

Do you drink the beer before or after the, ah, operation? OAITW r.2.0 Feb 2021 #20

I prefer to call it an "extraction"... ret5hd Feb 2021 #25

The guy who is IN the cage should drink... 3catwoman3 Feb 2021 #35

Can I watch? stevil Feb 2021 #24

You will have to sign an NDA... ret5hd Feb 2021 #26

This might be the greatest written opening sentence on a news story that I have ever read. OAITW r.2.0 Feb 2021 #10

Why the hell would you buy one of these without a manual override of some sort? happybird Feb 2021 #16

Well, actually you wouldn't be fucked. Mr.Bill Feb 2021 #53

Lol! happybird Feb 2021 #54

Oops, hit the wrong reply button happybird Feb 2021 #17

Gee, this is odd underpants Feb 2021 #46

He/She totally had me at "weird meeage".... OAITW r.2.0 Feb 2021 #50

From the full article: grumpyduck Feb 2021 #12

It was bad enough when people just put pictures of their penis on the Internet. n/t PoliticAverse Feb 2021 #14

I had to look it up, Dan Feb 2021 #15

Not My Bag -Baby! Stallion Feb 2021 #18

A thousand bucks is all? That's pretty cheap ... relayerbob Feb 2021 #27

Micropenis. n/t MicaelS Feb 2021 #28

Nothing the Jaws of Life Miguelito Loveless Feb 2021 #31

Jaws of Life? ironflange Feb 2021 #37

Yeah, but they don't make nearly as much noise Miguelito Loveless Feb 2021 #45

HODL. nt RandiFan1290 Feb 2021 #34

The internet of things, eh? Ron Obvious Feb 2021 #38

he'd have been better off... dhill926 Feb 2021 #39

The internet of things Cirque du So-What Feb 2021 #40

Not much of a man, if you ask me jmowreader Feb 2021 #41

HAHA omg Skittles Feb 2021 #51

... Solly Mack Feb 2021 #42

Sure they aren't asking for a Naughy Bitcoin? Generic Brad Feb 2021 #43

We all know we have to use protection. Lady Freedom Returns Feb 2021 #44

This incident also made Summers reconsider using internet-connected devices, underpants Feb 2021 #48

I always hate when they do that to me TomVilmer Feb 2021 #52