Through high school(s) and college, the “pretty” girls avoided nerds like me as if we were both radioactive and known spreaders of the bubonic plague.
I figured it was my lifelong fate to admire them from afar, but I found there were other cultures out there where if you were an interesting nerd with a sense of humor, it didn’t matter that I wasn’t rich, a male model, or the varsity football star (Was ist ein Varsity?). So, in a dark, smoky cabaret in Berlin in July, 1974, I met a 22 year old woman—I was also 22—from the flat farmland of northwestern Germany. She was fun, intelligent, and somewhat intrigued by the first American she had met who spoke German. To her, at the time, America was as far away as Pluto, and she never thought she’d ever see it. For that matter, she thought that she’d never see me again after that summer. Now, 47 years later, I still think she’s beautiful, anyway (opinions may vary), and we’re grandparents three times over.
I should repeat that she does not meet one of the attributes mentioned in the OP. While she is attractive (in my eyes, anyway) and white (comes from a 550 year old family in Germany, so DUH), she is not American. But there is a big world out there. Some meet their ideal partner less than a mile from where they grew up. I had to cross an ocean to meet mine. But there's no reason why it CAN'T happen. So you're not Ben Affleck or Sidney Poitier? Hell, neither am I. It's not always a deciding factor.
December, 1974, in Germany:
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May, 2021 in Dallas (photo by DUer 7wo 7rees):
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