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lunasun

(21,646 posts)

5. you may continue to allow his actions but chances are society will not . exiting and not enabling

Wed May 24, 2017, 10:42 AM

May 2017

may help him while he is young to get his act together or seek help with his issues
whats the ultimate time out forkids who do not change bad habits?
jail- if the family doesn't have consequences set up, society at some point will
it may not be jail just ostracism by being deliberately left out of a group or social setting by exclusion and rejection but either way if he can realize that hes not being accepted with his current temperament by family now it could help him in life later.
Sounds like his mother already is making him live with consequences

plenty of disavantaged kids in need of help trying hard to better themselves and doing good already in life if you feel guilty about your decision there are many groups set up for donations

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At what point do you cut ties with a toxic family member? [View all] Coventina May 2017 OP

How old is your nephew? sinkingfeeling May 2017 #1

He is 20 Coventina May 2017 #2

Now would be a good time get the red out May 2017 #3

Thanks. I was thinking along those lines. Coventina May 2017 #4

you may continue to allow his actions but chances are society will not . exiting and not enabling lunasun May 2017 #5

He spent 4 days in jail for the domestic incident. Coventina May 2017 #7

Once a person is out of high school or college PoindexterOglethorpe May 2017 #6

Thanks. I was basically coming to the same conclusion. Coventina May 2017 #8

It's easier said than done... Phentex May 2017 #9

Thanks. You are correct, it is much easier said than done. Coventina May 2017 #12

Does he have a clinical depression issue? Checked for mental issues? haele May 2017 #10

He has been in and out of counseling a number of times. Coventina May 2017 #13

I know that drill. haele May 2017 #17

Thanks so much. It really helps to hear from someone who has been there. Coventina May 2017 #18

Make sure the nephew does attend counseling. haele May 2017 #21

If it were me, I wouldn't necessarily cut ties. blogslut May 2017 #11

Thanks. I think we do need to rethink our approach. It has always been unconditional. Coventina May 2017 #14

As soon as they become toxic. Kaleva May 2017 #15

Well, that ship has sailed..... Coventina May 2017 #16

It depends mythology May 2017 #19

When you are emotionally prepared to never go back Generic Brad May 2017 #20

I am so sorry to hear that you had a child... 3catwoman3 May 2017 #22

Thanks!! Yes, it is a pain I don't wish on anyone. Coventina May 2017 #23

The bereaved parent/sibling club is way bigger than... 3catwoman3 May 2017 #24

More hugs Coventina May 2017 #29

I am sorry shenmue May 2017 #25

How are you doing, sweetie? Coventina May 2017 #30

Yes, thanks shenmue May 2017 #37

I'm so sorry. It is a hard decision, and Ilsa May 2017 #26

I am very fortunate in that respect. My brother is very understanding. Coventina May 2017 #31

If you're ok with it, I'll send you a private message. NT Ilsa May 2017 #38

Any time! Coventina May 2017 #39

It is heartbreaking to love a deeply damaged person vlyons May 2017 #27

Yes, he most definitely needs help. And, it is clear he is not (yet) interested in truly changing. Coventina May 2017 #32

I have a niece and a nephew, who are both messes vlyons May 2017 #34

Thank you for your very kind insight and suggestions. Coventina May 2017 #35

I dearly hope he doesn't have or get a gun elfin May 2017 #28

I doubt he does. Despite all the abusive behavior of his father, his father was very anti-gun Coventina May 2017 #33

when only one side is making all the effort maybe it's time right now lunatica May 2017 #36

for me the correct time is mercuryblues May 2017 #40