'and thank you for that encouragement. The outpouring of empathy here on this thread, has been wonderful and help e a lot
I've actually been through this a number of times myself myself, but it seemed worse this time -- The older I get, the harder it seems to hit me. Maybe it's an age- related mortality reminder. Now that's THAT's a happy thought! 
Okay, time to leave The Gloom and Doom..I. read your profile and see that you.live you n Oregon....Lucky you!.. Do you live in Portland?.. A friend of mine moved there s few years ago.
Having lived in the Sam Francisco Bay area many years ago, I grew to truly love the Pacific Northwest.. Almost got to move back again, but a close family member came down with a severe illness and that threw a wrench in the plans.
Oh well, I guess I should.be going now..Thanks again, Calimary, for your very kind thoughts. 
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