BREAKING: Swifties call Gump's Medal of Honor "dubious"

[tridim]

<snip>

This guy, Private Forrest Gump volunteered for duty in Vietnam and was promptly "injured in the buttock", some say it was a self-inflicted, minor flesh wound. Private Gump is on record describing the minor injury as, "like a bee sting" and "a million dollar wound".

The reality is, Private Gump ate gallons of soft-serv ice cream and played ping pong for the US national team AFTER receiving his injury, all while still on the Army payroll. We therefore request that Private Gump return his Congressional Medal of Honor and apologize for accepting it in the first place.

Gump's friend, Lieutenant Dan refuted the charges, adding that he wanted to kick some serious swift boat veteran ass with his "magic leg".

[chelsea0011]

1. No. It's but TOCK'

[ForrestGump]

2. My name's ForrestGump, and

I don't endorse your message.

And that's all I have to say about that...

[Mick Knox]

3. lol