I'm gonna marry Martha Stewart

[Dookus]

when she gets out of prison.

I never liked her, but I thought her sentencing was a total jerk-off, so I subscribed to her magazine to support her. Yesterday I made yummy lemon/poppyseed cookies and today the bf and I just made her "watermelon refreshers".

12 cups watermelon, blended and strained.
3/4 cup sugar and 3/4 cup water, heated to a simple syrup, let to cool
1 cup fresh-squeezed lime juice
one cup tequila

mix it all up, pour it over ice. Super-duper yummiferous.

I am now a Stewartarian. How could I have been so gay for so long and not recognized the wonder that is Martha?

[bigwillq]

1. I also love Martha very much

But like you, only after all this mess happened and her going to jail.

Now I watch her show on Food network like everyday.

I think she does some wonderful stuff.

[Dookus]

2. Dunno if I'll watch the show

but the magazine has a LOT of good recipes. Hell, before you know it I'll be hand-dying my napkins and making candles out of my cats' ear wax.

[huntsvilledem]

3. I think Martha's a lesbian though

so you're probably out of luck. I mean why else would she never date or remarry after all these years?! I think she's going to have fun in prison.

[Dookus]

4. well I'm gay

so that's good. We won't have any unreasonable expectations for each other.

I'll have a very tastefully-appointed separate bedroom.

[huntsvilledem]

5. haha... yeah, that could work

and who knows, you might end up bi...

[soothsayer]

6. ok, then I'LL marry her! she's a nice Polish girl like me anyhow

Hang in there, Martha!

[Guy Fawkes]

7. I could do that for you if you donate to Fiengold...

I am an ordained minister with the Universal Life Church.

(BTW: I could do it now)

[Dookus]

8. I'm a ULC minister too

You're just tryin' to get a tip. Feh.

[Guy Fawkes]

9. No, I'm trying to get Fiengold a tip! This has nothing to do with me!