I married a nice guy!

[rbnyc]

I married a man who was polite, who listened to me, who treated me with admiration, affection and respect, who never yelled at me, who never felt he had to prove I was wrong so that he could be right, who had a generally sweet demeanor, and who had a good relationship with his mom!

Not only did I marry him, but we had and continue to have loads of hot and gratifying sex.

And beyond that, before I met him, I almost always dated and/or slept with people who were nice and who treated me with kindness. The few times I didn't, it was a big mistake, which I recognized and corrected the situation ASAP.

Plus, tho I'm kind of old and fat now, I used to be hot. Seriously, I was a very attractive and sexy young woman. (My husband still thinks I am, but that's love.)

I know it's just anecdotal, but it does pay to be nice. And as for the minority, I believe, of people who are attracted to jerks...why would anyone want to taylor their behavior to attract someone who has such twisted ego issues anyway?

[DS1]

1. I don't have to prove people are wrong to make me right

I have to prove people are wrong because they're wrong.

[rbnyc]

2. If only we'd met 10 years ago...

...

:evilgrin:

*sigh*

[DS1]

5. 'rly?

:*

[rbnyc]

6. You know you're my DU crush!

Well, one of them, but it's a very short list.

:*

[distantearlywarning]

3. I married a nice guy too.

Your description of your husband sounds a lot like mine.

I admit that I dated some not-so-nice guys when I was much younger, but I got over that before the age of 25. If for some reason I were to become single again, I would never go for the bad guy - I'd go out and find myself another nice, respectful, kind-of-geeky sweet one, even if he weren't the hottest guy on the block. I think all this talk of "girls just want mean guys" probably mostly applies to young girls. Most of us get better with a little age and maturity and figure out that the mean guys are way too much trouble and drama.

[rbnyc]

4. Yep.

Actually my best friend used to always pick the worst guys! (We've been friends since we were 17.) She grew out of it, thank God!

Now she's engaged to a very nice guy!

[lukasahero]

7. Here here! Me too! Let's hear it for the "real" nice guys

And of course, I think he's hot and handsome. He's also (relatively) short, a math genius, wears glasses, weighs a whopping 145 lbs (considerably up from his high school/college days due to extraordinary effort and dedication on his part), he's quiet and shy and the hottest lover one could ever want. Oh yeah, he's sensitive, romantic, a little old-fashioned (read: polite) and a whole host of all those other "nice" guy traits that we women "so despise".

He also has a life (i.e. - friends, hobbies, interests - art and gardening! HA! Imagine that!). He never considered blaming women for any relationship "failures", and chose to work on overcoming his shyness rather than sit at a computer and complain about how he was so "nice" and all women were bitches.

And to put this in perspective for the guys, this "nice" guy married a really pretty, petite, oft-persued musician whose few adventures in the dating "not nice" guys realm only came from being far too trusting and painfully naive.

[rbnyc]

9. Thanks for your post.

Especially you rlast point. Not every woman who dates a jerk was looking for a jerk.

[Heidi]

8. Not only did I marry a nice guy, but all of the nice guys

that I've dated over the years (and didn't marry) are our very good friends. :thumbsup: