Lapp Yuletide

[datasuspect]

Christmas is a festive holiday in Sàpmi (the Saami homeland). The Saami await a Yuletide visit from a giant horned and hairy wildman named Stallo. In Lappish, “stallo” means “metal-man.” Sometimes Stallo is dressed in stylish, all-black clothes like an MIB (Man in Black) or in a metallic suit, reminiscent of a robot or ancient astronaut in a spacesuit. Most likely the metal suit was the chain mail armour of the berserker Vikings.

The amoral Stallo delights in macabre acts of genital mutilation of his innocent victims. He pokes his staff up the skirts of young girls. On Christmas Eve, he rides around in his sleigh looking for something to drink.

Traditionally, the Saami drive a stake into the ground near a fresh water supply so Stallo can tie up his sled while having a refreshing gulp of water. If Stallo cannot find anything to drink, he will bash in a child’s skull, sucking out the brains and blood to satiate his ravenous thirst.


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