Holy shit. How bad can I be?

[crim son]

Huge fight tonight/this morning. Everything I do is "fucking" wrong. It's funny; I feel sad but also very numb because I realize most of what he said is not true.

I'm in love with a man who hates himself and I have to leave until he gets it straightened out. He never will and so, I am on my own again. I can't stand to be called a fucking bitch.

It's been a hard night but I feel strangely tough. Even typing it makes me smile, so I'm either deranged or... okay. I believe it's the latter.

Thanks for listening. These past couple years have SUCKED and it ain't over yet, baby. At least I'm entertained. -L

[taterguy]

1. . . .

:hug: :hug:

[Guava Jelly]

2. oh honey

I'm sorry.:hug:
Just move to Missouri and we can have a torrid affair k :D

[Callalily]

3. This is the time

to take care of yourself. And it's not being selfish either. :hug:

[NewWaveChick1981]

4. Crim son, you SHOULD feel tough.

:hug: :) You've survived quite a lot of crap the past couple of years. :) And you're still here to prove it! :pals:

[cuke]

18. That's what saves me

It can be incredibly hard to face the problems that pop up in our lives, but thinking about how much I've accomplished by dealing with them helps give me the courage and optimism to carry on.

[NewWaveChick1981]

22. That's a great outlook!

:hi: :) I've been through a lot myself, but I'm still here. :D Glad to know you're optimistic too!

[cuke]

26. It better be

It cost me enough in therapy bills to realize it

[lost-in-nj]

5. Your not bad at all

:hug:
and there is nothing wrong with you

you know he has the problem .... you said so yourself....
concentrate on you and your kids......

have fun today....

lost

[mzteris]

6. you just need to learn

how to be ALONE. You do NOT "need" a man in your life.

Have you had any therapy? I think it might be important. You keep going back to this abusive asshole and you need to ask yourself - WHY?

I'm sorry if this sounds harsh and preachy, but it needs to be said. Please understand that I'm only saying it because I am concerned about you.

:hug:

[BarenakedLady]

7. No one

has the right to call you that EVER!

Stay stong, my friend. You deserve more, much more.

Come hang out in NY.

:hug:

[Genevieve]

8. When I was young, I asked my

psychiatrist "Why is Freddy mean to me - Why does he act like this - what's wrong with Freddy?"
And my shrink said to me :
"The question shoudn't be why Freddy acts the way he does,
but what's wrong with YOU that you keep accepting his abusive behavior?"

[Droopy]

9. Eh, ditch him. It's not worth the stress.

There are plenty of nice guys out there.

[SPKrazy]

10. Well sometimes life sucks

you're probably deranged :P

Sorry you are hurting but truly you'll be okay.

hang in there woman!

:hug: :hug:

[electron_blue]

11. You're not bad. Hang in there, you'll find your way through this.

I was also in love with a man who hated himself. When I finally realized that, it helped me see everything so much more clearly.

[bluethruandthru]

12. I'm sorry you are going through this.

What are you getting from the relationship that is worth the abuse and heartache? You're a good person and you don't deserve what this guy is dishing out.

[Mojorabbit]

13. I was married to a man like that once

He was my grand passion and I loved him dearly. He just did not love himself. I still hear from him 25 years later. He has not changed. I made the right decision and so have you. Some things can't be fixed unless the person themselves wants it. We can't do it for them.

[Starbucks Anarchist]

14. Hey...

:hug: :hug:

[SarahB]

15. Damn, that's a lot of bullshit to put up with.

I'm sorry you've had to deal with that. :hug:

[applegrove]

16. Sorry for your loss.

[Maestro]

17. Sorry to hear this.

If he is calling these names, good riddance! Life is too short. Enjoy it. A great person will come around. Give it time.

[billyskank]

19. Not bad enough to be called a fucking bitch.

You didn't deserve that or him.

[Genevieve]

20. nor does she deserve to be manhandled --

like he did to her in a bar one night.
and she had to keep her shades drwan, and not answer her phone because she was so afraid.

And to think, this is still a fairly new relationship - just imagine when the honeymoon period is over.

[Inchworm]

21. Oh dear - shoo him off!

:(

:hug:

[Arugula Latte]

23. You.Deserve.Better.

Do not put up with this. Get rid of him!!

Do not settle -- it's not worth it. Wait until you find someone worthy of you.

[WritingIsMyReligion]

24. Ditch the asshole.

Now.

That's all he is, dear--a complete, no-holds-barred dipshit. You deserve a thousand things better than that and all the other shit he's given you. You never need a man to be complete.

:hug:

[mainegreen]

25. That's terrible. You really deserve a good luck streak.