So my 15yo son called the Viagra Consumer Hotline

[Midlodemocrat]

and told them his penis had turned purple. He and his buddy thought it would be funny.

I had to remind the little idiot that all of those calls are recorded for FDA purposes and if the feds show up, I'm giving him to them.

God I have a hard life. And, no, that is NOT a pun.

[NightWatcher]

1. did your son record the call?

was it funny?

[Midlodemocrat]

4. Nothing my son does is funny. It's all designed to land him in a federal penitentiary.

[ProudToBeBlueInRhody]

34. Well, I'm glad you aren't deluded like so many parents about a kid's potential

The Bushes were about their son, and now look what harm it's caused.

[flvegan]

2. Funny would be them showing up at his school

"Would purple-penised TeenMidlo please report to the office" over the PA would be priceless.

[Midlodemocrat]

5. TeenMidlo does NOT have a penis. That would be her brother.

:rofl:

[flvegan]

7. Jesus, how many

womb punchers (thank you, DS1) do you have?!

[Midlodemocrat]

8. 3

TM, BoyMidlo and BabyMidlo.

[flvegan]

11. I thought BoyMidlo was much younger than 15

[Midlodemocrat]

12. He only acts much younger.

Unfortunately, he's enormous. Not a good combination, stupidity and brawn.

[flvegan]

13. Don't I know it!

Hey, wait...

[driver8]

18. "Womb Punchers"???!!!

:spank: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[Deja Q]

21. "womb punchers" become "thread kickers" - isn't the umbellical cord a thread?

:evilgrin:

[Arugula Latte]

24. My firstborn was a womb-puncher.

Twice when I was pregnant with him I stopped in my tracks because it felt like someone had jabbed me from the outside with a sharp stick. Weird sensation, it didn't feel like it came from The Interior. It frickin' HURT, too.

Oh, well. Maybe it was just Satan poking me with his pokey-thing ...(No, not THAT pokey thing, gutterminds!)

[Vanje]

3. Cheeky!

Atta boy!

I made my last prank call about 6 years ago.




(I'm 51 years old!)

[Midlodemocrat]

6. They do it all the time. They're under the impression that it's funny.

:eyes:

[LaraMN]

9. Once my mom sent an envelope to my Grandma that had

"pregnancy test results enclosed" printed on the front (it was a gag thing she bought.)
My grandma had thirteen kids. It was kind of sick, but funny.

[marzipanni]

10. I Think I have areptile dysfunction

My chameleon turned purple. :hi:

[sasquatch]

14. Of course you know that will cost you booze money when you have to get him a lawyer

The Boxed wine & wine cooler industry will be quite upset.

[Midlodemocrat]

15. Oh, I am NOT getting him a lawyer. He can stew in jail.

Not really. He's my baby. I just wuvs him.

[sasquatch]

17. Do you "wuvs" him as much as you "wuv" Franzia?

:D

[flvegan]

16. Didn't you hear? She got a sponsor! Sure the giant "Riunite on ice...so nice"

stickers across the sides of the minivan are kinda tacky, but it keeps the supply fresh.

[sasquatch]

20. They couldn't get it to match with the Confederate Red?

:shrug:

[Midlodemocrat]

28. Hello? The MidloVan is Navy Blue.

Try to keep up.

:eyes:

[sasquatch]

35. Navy Blue eh? With "BX WNE FAN" plates!

:evilgrin:

[Shell Beau]

19. Haha! Not a pun...

Good luck! Gotta be tough!
;) :hug:

[Midlodemocrat]

23. That'll be you in 15 years, Shell.

:rofl:

:hi:

[Shell Beau]

26. Haha!! And I know payback is a bitch!! Like I was when I was 15!!!

:scared:

[Deja Q]

22. Aye, that is a wee bit stupid on his part...

No puns intended either, but still... Maybe if he wrote about a kid doing that in a sitcom, but not in real life for goodness' sake!! :wow:

[Bake]

25. And when I was his age we thought it was funny to call the grocery store

And ask if they had Prince Albert in a can ...

Bake

[Dr. Strange]

27. Sounds like he needs to be told the story of "The Boy Who Cried Erection."

It should be at your local library.

[Bucky]

29. the word you want is "difficult" or "challenging"

not "fucked up"

[redqueen]

31. Who said fucked up?

Did I miss somethin?

[Midlodemocrat]

32. I did, too.

:shrug:

[redqueen]

30. Aaahaahahahaha!

That's hilarious!


I never could do prank calls... I always started laughing about 2 seconds in. :eyes:

[tigereye]

33. I could do without the VIagra commercials

it's not something I really want to discuss with my son - other than, it's a grown-up product you won't need for a long, long time. ;)

[nomorenomore08]

36. A friend of mine in high school

made a prank call posing as James Brown, and when the person on the other end mashed one of the number keys in response, he yelled, "Get up offa that thang!" One of the most hilarious things I ever witnessed.

[triguy46]

37. I had that some problem!!!!

:woohoo: