What if John Kerry catches Osama?

[Doosh]

ultimate tin foil hate theory, but hear me out.

Kerry and Teresa secretely put together and fund a groups of Afghan/Tajik/Uzbek etc rebels that go about the country side hunting for Osama and Al Qaeda, seperate from the US or Pakistan military, sort of like bounty hunters. This of course would be top secret but in the rare instance it did leak out I doubt the story would really hurt Kerry since the perception of being weak on terror would go out the window. It would show how serious Kerry is about hunting down and killing the bad guys. Imagine if Kerry's own Afghan militia track down Osama, that would totally turn the tables on Bush!

[iwantmycountryback]

1. Wouldn't that be illegal or something?

It'd be pretty damn awesome but it doesn't sound law-abiding.

[Syrinx]

6. there's nothing illegal about capturing terrorists

He would get a reward from the government, which he could donate to the families of our soldiers killed in bush's war.

[POed_Ex_Repub]

2. Freepers would post a "Forged Osama theory"

Which the media would immediately pick up and admonish Kerry for not apologizing to Bush.

At least that's the way things seem to be going lately...

[shockingelk]

7. He's a fake! Kerry built him out of murdered baby cells!

:lol:

[NightTrain]

3. The media would spin it to make Kerry look bad.

If John Kerry walked on water, the headlines would read, KERRY CAN'T SWIM!

[Norquist Nemesis]

4. Don't forget Reagan dirty tricks

that negotiated the handoff just after his inauguration when it was Carter administration that did all of the work.

[Awsi Dooger]

5. Can't he just bribe the goons guarding him?

I thought Osama was already being held somewhere, for late October unveiling.

Admittedly difficult to keep up with these conspiracies, especially once football season started.