Keef, we are not hiding anything. And nobody has even asked.

[bleever]

If we're hiding. Anything. Which we aren't, and that's why nobody should even ask. If. We. Are. Hiding. Anything. Keef. That's why the question has no teef.

So nobody's even asking, Keef.

[bleever]

1. Not. Hiding. Any. Thing. Not above. Not beneaf.

:)

[bleever]

34. There's nothing to hide! That's why you can't see it.

Not because there's something. That we're hiding. Because we're not. That's why we can't show you.

Best election ever, Keef.

[Patsy Stone]

93. I got my rhymin' and stylin' mojo workin' ... Sort of.

Keef! Stop sayin' I is lyin'!
We chose precincts in advance,
They were fine!

Not hidin' nuffin'!
No ballot stuffin'!
The hand counts were sublime.

Nuffin' to see here, son.
Get over it, "W won!"
Wif no hep from me -- It's the troof you see
The bloggers are just cryin'.

bleever, I love this thread. :)


edited b/c: Oops, I realized I posted this in the wrong place. Should have gone to the OP. Sorry!

[seito]

96. lol

Oh Katherine...

WHAT ARE YOU HIDING???

[texpatriot2004]

2. I asked. I sent an e-mail asking. What's Katherine Blackwell

lying about now?

[Patsy Stone]

3. I sent him this...

I know I'm outing myself, cause I'm sure they're here... Hi guys!

While you're at it:
Tell him to stick to the dark suits (much nicer)
Change that caricature -- the teeny hands freak me out.

Keef, you just rock!


http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=203&topic_id=167375&mesg_id=167515

I also mentioned that either Kathy B is hiding something or he's just so award-winningly stupid that next he's going to pull a Mohammed Salameh and go ask for the deposit back on the rental van.

:)

[bleever]

8. That's another great piece of work, Pats.

Very nicely done. Though I suggest that before submitting to your thesis committee, you change "I’m just talking out of my butt here" to "other plausible hypotheses might be offered".

And in gratitude I offer you this festive holiday wreaf!

[Patsy Stone]

11. But, why?

I think it adds a certain "je ne sais quoi," don't you?
Thanks! :)

[bleever]

31. Sorry, Pats.

I prejudged your butt. That was illiberal of me. In fact, it was beneaf me.

And as I think about it, perhaps je sais bien quoi.

:7

[texpatriot2004]

4. Not hiding what? Who's not hiding? Uh, I mean, Who's hiding?

[texpatriot2004]

5. We're not hiding, we're just not showing but we're not hiding.

Right? Sure. Okay.

[Straight Shooter]

6. Keef, Keef, Keef.

Can't you see I'm just a lonely guy, doing a lonely job, in a lonely town. Oh, Keef, you break my heart wif your questions.

[texpatriot2004]

7. And, Keef, I am not gonna be able to get elected as dog catcher

[texpatriot2004]

9. Nofing here Keef, look Elvis!

[texpatriot2004]

10. I would let you see Keef but I am unable to because I would

be in big trouble. So you see Keef, I am not showing...still, I am not hiding.

[texpatriot2004]

29. Keef I got nothin to hide, I'm not hiding nothin, No hiding, no how

no way, no siree Keef
I am tellin ya
I am a straight up kind of guy
hip slick and cool,
no hiding man,
nothin under the desk,
nothin in that box, or that one either,
nothin in the machines with the dead batteries,
nothin in Warren Co, or any other county either Keef,
no all clear here, on the up and up we are Keef

[crispini]

12. WTF is this thread about?

:shrug: I am completely confused.

[JohnnyCougar]

13. Blackwell

[crispini]

14. Could I maybe get a little more of an answer than that, please?

What did Blackwell say/do this time?

[Razorback_Democrat]

15. I hear ya! WTF?

[JohnnyCougar]

16. The usual.

:P

[crispini]

17. So was there a new statement today, or something?

Or is this thread just for funzies?

[JohnnyCougar]

18. I dunno.

I kind of just thought it was for funnies. If there was a statement, it doesn't sound like Blackwell is saying anything new, anyways.

[genieroze]

72. We're not soldiers we are

chick, chick, chickenhawks.

[texpatriot2004]

19. FUNZIES is it as far as I know and it is FUN. n/t

[seito]

22. Satire

The speaker in Blackwell and heez not hiding nuthin.

[greenmutha]

30. I love this thread! n/t - just floaty hearts...

:loveya:

[texpatriot2004]

20. What is this guy hiding?

http://tinypic.com/view.html?pic=x5ztf

[loritooker]

21. Thanks guys, you brightened my day! I needed that!!

[texpatriot2004]

23. It's kind of a dull day in Texas, my neck of the woods, is gray

rainy and cold...this brightened my day too.

[ClassWarrior]

24. Honest, Keef, I am not a crook.

Oooops. Wrong crook.

NGU.

[texpatriot2004]

25. The thing is Keef, it's all his fault for making noise about it n/t

[texpatriot2004]

26. No Keef, they are all wrong, I am right, nofing to see here

[loritooker]

27. And Arnebeck's case has no teef. n/t

[texpatriot2004]

28. Yeah Keef, no teef, and NO you can't see

[texpatriot2004]

32. What IS he hiding? Look and see. (image)

http://tinypic.com/view.html?pic=x5ztf

[texpatriot2004]

33. Hi Keef, what am I...what? Hiding? Who? Me? Nope. Not me.

Still nofing here to see Keef. Move on, carry on Keef, carry on.

[lonestarnot]

35. Keef...we not teefs

[Taming the Shrub]

36. I would not hide them in a box

I could not keep them under locks
I could not would not count those stacks
Especially those from fellow blacks

[texpatriot2004]

37. Keef, you see, it's my job to deliver Ohio with Diebold & ESS

Keef, I am not hiding I am not showing I am not telling but I am knowing...how Ohio was stole-ing.

[bleever]

43. LOL! Mr. Geisel would approve.

And welcome to DU!

:hi:

[New Earth]

38. kick

what are they hiding?

[bleever]

39. And Keef, it's an insult to suggest that we're hiding ANYfing.

So you see, if we actually let you see the ballots and machines, it would undermine the trust we place in our elected officials.

Nothidinganyfingstupidheaddogcatcherbestelectioneverkeef.


:7

[roseBudd]

40. Keef, I lick Bush boot, wanna see?

Go to http://somnamblst.tripod.com to download this and other high res PDF or TIF files for printing

[bleever]

42. Keep up the good work, rosebud57!

[roseBudd]

73. just got back from the grocery store and my cart corral BUSH CHEATED

has been up for 3 weeks now.

[intelle]

41. Just wanted to make an observation

This thread is hilarious!

Thank you!

:7

[texpatriot2004]

44. What did you say Keef? You see what? Where? No you don't

You don't see anything Keef. There was nothing there Keef. No Keef, there is nothing here either. You saw something you say? No way. Keef, I repeat, we aren't hiding anything. Don't look Keef...don't look now Keef, avert your eyes Keef...Look Keef, ELVIS!

[bleever]

45. About that bulge: I can't divulge

What's in my coat
But it isn't votes!

There's nothing there
At all, you see
So look over there
And not at me.

Our mandate is
So big and strong
We cannot show you --
Takes too long!

Our proof is
Wondrous to behold
So just believe
What you are told.

So when the losers
Whine and snivel
We know it's tin-foil hat
Style drivel.

These folks are wild-eyed
and deranged;
Next thing you know
They'll count their change!

Ignore the crazies
Wanting proof.
You have my word:
I tell the troof.



Stupidheaddogcatchernothidinganyfingbestelectioneverkeef.

:smoke:

[texpatriot2004]

46. Bleever that is hilarious, thanks for the laugh out loud

Keef Ken "Katherine" Blackwell and his groupies are hiding something...

[bleever]

47. Thanks, tex. Hey: what are they hiding?

[lonestarnot]

48. Tarl I tunt/cunt hear ya...must have an ear infuction...I'll just stand

here for a while wit my tumb in my ass and frown a while. "They luv it" He stole that line from his twinnsies at the embarrassing convention.

[seito]

49. Bleever, you have outdone yourself

That is tooo funny :toast:

Nuffin to hide here Keef. Jus tellin da troof

[MelissaB]

50. LMAO!

"Ignore the crazies
Wanting proof.
You have my word:
I tell the troof."

This is my favorite stanza. Thanks for the laugh.

[texpatriot2004]

51. This is the part I like, I can't quit laughing at this whole poem

These folks are wild-eyed
and deranged;
Next thing you know
They'll count their change!

[bleever]

52. Thanks:

They dare presume
To ask to check!
O foulest fiends!
O rankest dreck!

Were this the old
Wild West, you fool,
I'd toss my gauntlet down,
We'd duel.

Falafel justice
Soon would reign:
I'd put a bullet
Between your brain.

evenifjessejacksonweredogcatcherkeefhecouldn'tcatchthedogsstupidheadbestelectioneverkeef.

:smoke:

[texpatriot2004]

53. Not as good as Bleever's poem but kind of fun to write

The day that Blackwell came to town
all the truth turned upside down

he hid the facts in a secret place and
dared to show his shameful face

until one day when his lies were found
his reputation burned to the ground

as he was carted off to jail
surprised his scheme could ever fail

the people that he never fooled
were oh so happy that they now ruled

[GetTheRightVote]

54. This thread is outragous and thanks for the laugh all of you,

Keep it up, I think we are need it.

[seito]

55. Ever notice

When the fun thread get kicked...Tex is in the house.

Thanks for that and

Thanks Bleever :hi:

Keepin Hope Alive

:yourock:

[bleever]

56. Nice tex!

Man, the last thing I expected from DU is that it would improve my feelings about Texas so much.

:hi:

[seito]

57. I know what you mean lol!!!! n/t

[bleever]

58. And now they want me under oaf!

;)

And Happy Festivus!!!!

[texpatriot2004]

59. I will not tell them under oaf, I will not tell them I will loaf. Keef I

Will not take the stand, not me
I will not tell them Keef you see
I will not show them anything
Or tell them what I know
cause
If I did I'd have to go and
If I went I couldn't be
Promoted by my Chimpy
So Keef I will not tell them
No, not me.

[seito]

60. An Ode to Troof and Chads

Keef oh Keef now don't you see
You'll na'er get da troof from me
I much too smart you'll na'er find
Da lil' traces lef behind

Don't bodder lookin in da drawer,
Dem ballets aint der anymore
and don't you think about dem chads
I shove de exta up my *ss

[texpatriot2004]

61. Seito, I like it, it's really funny, thanks friend and good night n/t

[New Earth]

62. LMAO

[shraby]

63. This has got to be the best thread ever!

:bounce: :bounce: :bounce: :bounce:

And a toast to the poets.
:toast: :toast: :toast: :toast:

[ClassWarrior]

76. Y'know... come to think of it...

I've never seen bleever, seito, or texpatriot2004 in the same room as Dr. Seuss. Hmmmmm...

NGU.

[seito]

77. LMAO

You figured it out...

[loritooker]

67. Its a bird! Its a plane! Its Under Oaf! (n/t)

[loritooker]

64. Keef, Keef

Keef, Keef!
Listen up! Are you deef?
There's nothing above. There's nothing beneaf.
You may as well look in your holiday wreaf.
Cause. we. aren't. hiding. anything. here.

[Cyclical]

65. A pensive moment

There is some truly wonderful poetry going on here!
My personal favorite so far:
"Were this the old
Wild West, you fool,
I'd toss the gauntlet down,
We'd duel."

Feckin great.
And my own humble offering...

***
If vote fraud was a ship, dear Keef,
I'd say you'd run up on a reef -
And not the kind that's on your door
For Christmas. Keef, I beg, no more!

Please don't proceed to clear your froat
And speak of how we swiped the vote
Some fings are just too classified,
But no, we've not a fing to hide!

I fear that all our plans to fwart
Democracy are falling short
Oh, curse you, Keef, you make me shout!
Come on, man! Help a n***a out!

When you report on Triad's deal
It makes elections hard to steal
And hey! Our ballots aren't bad!
I dare you: Find a single chad!

And never mind lockdowns in Warren.
All is well, Keef! No, there aren't
Any problems here at all.
Ignore that writing on the wall!

Those nasty lib'rals put it there,
To try and make you more aware
Aware? Oh no, I mean afraid -
They use the politics of hate!

Just don't indict me, if and when
The trials come. Cos really, then,
If I'm caught lying under oaf,
I'll cling to Bush - God save us bofe!

:silly:

[loritooker]

66. Wow! That's good. Now: A little more of my doggerel, Part II

Keef, Keef!
It's a partisan beef
Conyers and Cobb have a liberal belief
Come on! Be nice, man, and give me relief!
The media's not playing fair.

[Patsy Stone]

69. That's f'n great!

Kenny B. here, Keef
The troof is beyond beleef
Stop asking "Why?"
Now go! Goodbye..
Or I'll punch you in the teef.

It's late... and :loveya: cause, well, you know why.

[seito]

70. Time for another I think..

Keef I'm not ascared of you
Now, I got lots of stuff to do
So go away, you can not stay
Theres nuthin to see anyway

I told you Keef you may not look
I will not share my polling book
The vote machines were working fine
The totals weren't what I assigned

I don't have anything to hide
Really Keef, I'm on yer side
I wish that all could know the troofs
The vote fraud stories have no tooths

I tried to hide the best I can
But I'm no match for the Olbermann
I plead again my words cemented
Go away before I'm accidented :scared:

[Al-CIAda]

71. lmao- eom

[Patsy Stone]

75. LOL! n/t

[bleever]

79. Ding ding ding! We have another winner!

:)

[DoBotherMe]

95. LOL!

[seito]

68. lol n/t

[ClassWarrior]

74. Hey bleev!

Hope you're having a good holiday. I just ordered 100 "WHAT ARE THEY HIDING?" stickers from www.stickerjunkie.com.

NGU.

[bleever]

78. Okay, CW, I'm in.

Went to place an order and thought I'd check about your design and see if I wanted to copy it. Font? Graphic?

Having a lovely holiday. Merry Christmas.

[ClassWarrior]

82. Just the standard font - Franklin Gothic, I think - white on black...

...all caps:

WHAT ARE THEY HIDING?

Merry Christmas to you and yours, bleev...

NGU.

[ClassWarrior]

85. WHAT

[ClassWarrior]

86. ARE

[ClassWarrior]

87. THEY

[ClassWarrior]

88. HIDING?

[ClassWarrior]

89. WHAT, I SAY, WHAT??

NGU.

[seito]

90. Let me guess....

[bleever]

91. Hey, CW, they're hiding something:

WHAT??

[seito]

92. But What Could IT Be?

WHAT???

[lavendermist]

80. I can't resist...

Oh, leave us, Keef
Please be so kind
And leave the polling tapes behind.

Leave da machines, da hard drives too
We'll take vewy good care
Of dem for you.

We'll clean dem machines, polish dem too
Dey'll be spic and span
You'll tink dey are new.

Da man gonna be in da parade real soon
You bringin' up problems
Like you are a loon.

So go away, Keef, go back to your work
I gots nuttin' to hide, why
I don't even get perks.

I'm tellin' da troof, and soon I'll have proof
Just let me finish patchin'
Da hole in da roof.

So, go away, Keef,I gots bidness to do
I am not hidin' a ting from you.


You all rock!

:yourock:

[seito]

81. lol

YOU rock :bounce:

[texpatriot2004]

83. I like it, I really like it. n/t

[lonestarnot]

84. Keef somebody hid'n a chimp in dat White House. Dey call'n him a

president chimp. But Keef, I don't tink he really a chimp cause dem chimps dey actually intelligint. A dumb ass dis one is...likes all dis war'n n stuff. Hear he's a numb nut bully chimp... and dat ain't no fluff. Keef could you help us find dis cheat'n freak and shine him to da door... as we people sick a his shit and don't want no more!
Oh Keef...

[bleever]

94. "Please, Your Honor, don't make me show what I'm not hiding."

[seito]

97. Hey Bleever, have you seen Katherine lately?

[bleever]

98. Great smilie! And the last time I saw Kath, she was

over here:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=203x199711

:)

[Patsy Stone]

99. Nope. Still. Not. Hiding. Anyfing...

* Keeping his Mouth Shut: Secretary of State J. Kenneth Blackwell, who declared President Bush the official winner in Ohio, is seeking a court order to keep himself from being interviewed as part of a court challenge of the Nov. 2 vote.
http://www.latimes.com/news/politics/2004/la-na-briefs28.1dec28,1,6834191.story?coll=la-news-elect2004


Edited b/c I found the article. Their link didn't work.

From the latest Countdown newsletter... 12/28/04 12:08 p.m.

[bleever]

100. Hey Pats, Blackwell wants to be a shoo-in for governor, but...

this is the kind of shoe-in I think he's got coming:



;)

[Patsy Stone]

101. Bad link

But I think I get the idea wifout the visual aide. :)

Also, if this story is not "properly" reported tonight by You-Know-Who, we're gonna need somewhere else to play. Fasten your seatbelts...

[seito]

103. Naw, you NEED this visual aid

[bleever]

107. Try it again, Pats; it's working for me, at least.

And apparently seito, too.

:)

[Patsy Stone]

109. Much better

very good... :)

I'd certainly like to stick my foot you know where!

When will he go ask for the deposit back on the van? It can't be long now...

[bleever]

110. ROFLMAO!

NOW I can go cook dinner...

:)

[Miami Liberal]

102. Incriminating photo of Ms. Blackwell found

/ "I feel pretty, oh so pretty!"

[Patsy Stone]

104. Thanks. I needed that! n/t

[seito]

105. Oh Katherine

Oh Katherine you can't deny
The evidence is much to high
To think we would walk meekly by
Please share what you've been smokin



The truth were gonna surely find
The evidence you left behind
We're gonna tie you to the crime
Americans have spoken



Kath here is what you ought to do
Run now before the search is through
The crimes will all point back to you
So many laws you've broken

:scared:

[bleever]

106. Damn, seito, that could be a Dylan song.

I might have to write a tune for that one.

:thumbsup:

[sepia_steel]

108. Everytime I see the title of this thread I start cracking up. eom

[bleever]

111. Update:

"Your honor, Arnebeck's a thief
Who'd steal my time;
Please grant relief

From not just one suit
But from boaf,
So please, don't put me under oaf.

I'll spare no time
For a response
From hustling for the neo-cons.

They refuse
To have me be
Distracted by "democracy"

So off I go
On a public trip
To lecture on the Effics of Leadership.

[seito]

112. Ahh Bleever

I LOVE THIS THREAD

[seito]

113. WHAT

[seito]

114. ARE

[seito]

115. THEY

[seito]

116. HIDING?

edit:?

[bleever]

117. On this, the occasion of my 800th post, I have a simple question:

What are they hiding?

Hiding: what?

What are they? Hiding, I mean?

WHAT?

WHAT ARE THEY HIDING?




Thank you. Oh, and I'd like to thank the academy and its members.

:)

[loritooker]

118. NOFING!!

Bleever, you're the funniest!! : )

[keepthemhonest]

119. Bleever that

is hilarious.I can't believe I have not sen this thread before now I must hav been too busy fighting freeps and writing senators.

[seito]

120. I have bookmarked this thread to save for posterity

It is second only to the 'I Believe' thread.

Bleever, you are one talented and demented individual.
Thanks for helping me find the humor in EVERY situation.

[loritooker]

121. Keef, my friend, you can see that I am a man of action and principle.

Give me some money.

[loritooker]

122. P.S. I will be checking my mailbox daily...

[bleever]

123. *Cough*sputter*wheeze*gasp* that is the funniest damn thing

since I don't know when!

O.M.G.

whew

[loritooker]

125. why thank you bleever! n/t

[bleever]

124. Blackwell returns for his deposit on the van!

As predicted by our intrepid Patsy Stone (Dec. 16 and Dec. 28), Blackwell has returned to the scene of the crime to get his deposit back on the van he rented to carry out his heinous act.

"Hey, I pulled it off, nobody knows it was me, and now I'd like my deposit back."

Ran a fair election, made sure * won, ready for his RE-ward.

Sheesh.

If I may quote a young Alvy Singer, from "Annie Hall": "What an a**hole."


:eyes:


Edited to add: omg, it's post 911 for me.

[loritooker]

126. hey bleever, its post 911 for all of us! ; )

[Patsy Stone]

133. Hey, Joey Five Cents!

Thanks (blushing). They always return to the scene of the crime -- always.

"Brooklyn is NOT expanding..."

[bleever]

127. Keef, this orange jumpsuit is way too tight. And I don't like

the way my cellmate looks at me and calls me "Katherine".

:)

[Patsy Stone]

128. Oh, Keef!

It seems like it's gonna be
the Witness Protection Program for me
But, it's not because -- don't you see?
I'm hidin' nufin' illegally.

I always really wanted to be
a mailman in Tennessee!
So when the people look for me
Please remember my new identity

Not hidin' anything, you see
Everything was done perfectly
Will do interviews for a fee,
Just don't ask for Kathy B!

[bleever]

129. God, how I want to see him dance while he raps that out.

[seito]

132. LMAO

Yes, let's play...

What Are They Hiding?

[ClassWarrior]

130. That's right, we're ready to play another round of...

WHAT... ARE... THEY... HIDING???!

NGU.

[texpatriot2004]

131. Keef, don't bother with page 32, or 96, never mind page...

well, what I mean Keef is could you put the report down now. Step away from the report Keef. I'm not hidin' Keef. I did it all in plain sight. I am brazen Keef. Look Keef, Elvis.