Is there a different GLBT response to the Spitzer scandal?

[mondo joe]

I noted a couple of GLBT DUers offering more sympathetic responses to both Spitzers over in GD.

My own take was that I saw a lot of judging of both Mr. and Mrs. Spitzer over very personal matters: him for having sex outside the marriage, her for standing with him.

I wonder if GLBT people, who have had private matters so critically judged, are more sensitive to the private and often complex nature of sex and relationships. Or maybe we're just more reluctant to be volunteers for the Sexual Morality Police.

Or maybe I'm just seeing something that's not there.

What do you think?

[David Dunham]

1. Spitzer is the first elected governor ever to support same-sex marriage

[soleft]

2. it's not the sex it's breaking the law

And the stupidity to not only break the law, but to committ a felony offense. There's something seriously wrong with Eliot Spitzer if he was so compulsive he knowingly transported a prostitute across state line.

If this was an affair, it was a misdeamnor sexual offense, that would be different.

His judgement is seriously flawed.

[mondo joe]

3. I don't disagree on that. But that's not what I'm asking about. I'm talking more about the

personal aspects.

[soleft]

5. It's not the personal aspects that have destroyed his career

and hurt a lot of people. It's the pubic and professional.

[mondo joe]

7. Again, that's not what I'm talking about. I mean the posts about him wanting "that kind

of sex" or being "kinky", or the comments about his wife being "weak" or criticizing her choice to stand with him.

[soleft]

9. If people are open and non-judgemental about sex

They're not going to care about those issues. You don't have to be gay to be open and non-judgemental when it comes to sex.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

16. i think more gay people are non judgmental about sex though

whenever there is one of those cheating threads in the lounge, you can see that

[IntravenousDemilo]

21. Heh heh, you said "pubic"... n/m

[acmavm]

4. Yeah, right. It's all about sex outside of marriage. That's it.

[terrya]

6. This is between Eliot Spitzer and his family.

Period.

It seems to me.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

13. agreed

[lightningandsnow]

8. Personally, I think prostitution should be completely decriminalized,

So I think it wasn't morally wrong to be involved with a sex worker. However, cheating on your partner is wrong.

That being said, I think this situation is between him, his wife, and the sex worker. I really don't care all that much.

[Smarmie Doofus]

18. Do we know for a fact that he was "cheating"?

>>>However, cheating on your partner is wrong>>>>

Can we be certain that the two did not have an understanding?

[lightningandsnow]

20. True.

Even more of a reason for it to be none of my buisness.

[closeupready]

10. I think you nail it for me here.

There are decent people, Democrats and Repukes alike, who are strict "law and order" kinds of people, even when the laws make no sense, or are morally objectionable and even unconstitutional. A little scary and authoritarian, like as it was with Germans under Hitler, but on a less malignant scale.

I am not like that, and also, as you indicate, laws as they pertain to sexuality have traditionally penalized gays and lesbians most harshly, so excuse the eff out of me if I don't respect vice laws.

Where Spitzer messed up was in his hypocrisy, and not just mild hypocrisy but really egregious hypocrisy taking a strong stance as guardian of moral values (and actually doing some great things) but then breaking the law.

File this incident in the same category as the one where you'll find the file on Dan Rostenkowski.

[mondo joe]

11. There may be another factor in GLBT response to the personal aspects of this story:

same sex relationships are largely void of the gender-roles in hetero couples. I see a lot of people projecting their own marriages, or drawing from the Spitzers some sort of statement on all of womankind or all of mankind. People who have been in same sex relationships may not have the same buttons to be pushed.

It's one of the things I usually feel fortunate about, not having preconceived notions of what partner is supposed to do what.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

12. i think glbt'ers are less judgemental about sex. i think what he did was stupid

but its also not really my concern.

i was going to post a thread here the other day, about whether we as a group, have a different attitude towards sex/sexuality than straights.

[mondo joe]

14. Oh you can still post that!

I think we are, and I think it's interesting.

In patr I think we have lived with some sort of sexual "outlaw" status. I also think many of us have seen a more diverse set of relationships and may have a broader sense of what is to be expected.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

15. i think we understand that morality exists outside of sex as well, and while sex is important

it is not necessarily an important determinant on character.

atleast this is how i feel

[dsc]

17. As I posted in general discussion

I know that I, not all that long ago, would have been fired from my job for my sex life. It puts this into perspective for me.

[galledgoblin]

19. I think those who have really stopped and pondered sexual issues have a different response,

GLBT and S.

for me, like most others, the prostitution bothers me less than the ethical breach.

I don't like cheating and I don't like prostitution because of the exploitation of the prostitutes, and I can't see any way (even through legalization and heavy regulation) to eliminate the victimization, but yeah, sex between two consenting people? not a big issue for me.

[IntravenousDemilo]

22. Damned straight people, it's all sex with them! See what happens when you give them rights? n/m

Not that there's anything wrong with being straight, but do they have to shove their perversion in our faces like that?

[NMMNG]

23. Here you go

How Widespread Will the Elliot Spitzer Fallout Be? To Gay Americans, Very.

[Amimnoch]

24. I don't support sexual morality regulation, period.

As long as it's between consenting adults.. Prostitution has been around for a very long time, and will continue to be probably until the end of man. I've never seen the attraction of it, but I know several people who are particular to hustlers (gay male prostitutes). If an adult male or female voluntarily elects to sell their body for sex, and another adult male/female chooses to pay for it, it shouldn't be the laws business period. Now it may very well be their wife/husband, boyfriend/girlfriend, partner/lover's business but it shouldn't be the Law's.

The only time I see these busts as a good thing, is when it's against someone who's spent their legislative/executive time specifically trying to legislate against the very acts they are engaging in (ahem Larry Craig). To the best of my knowledge Governer Spitzer hasn't signed off on any legislation that is against prostitution, nor made it part of his political platform.

[mondo joe]

25. I'm always surprised when I see comments in GD judging personal sexual matters.

I shouldn't be any more, but I am.

[Chovexani]

26. I agree. Tax and regulate it.

It's called the world's oldest profession for a reason.

I say tax and regulate it, and let the sex workers unionize.

[and-justice-for-all]

27. I dont care where the guy sticks it...nt

[GodlessBiker]

28. Affairs are private, but he was a coward for not going to the podium on his own.

He imposed this burden on himself, and he should have faced it on his own at that podium.

As an aside, so far I am loving Patterson.