Whistling = Too much yin?

[dawgmom]

I read in the lounge that whistling a lot is a sign that somebody has too much yin. I whistle all the time, and I'm really worried about this. Is there a blood test or something to determine my yin levels?

[TZ]

1. The solution is simple.

You simply need to add more Yang to your diet! That will balance out your natural harmonies!
Take it from me, I know about these things..I found out recently that I don't have a chronic blood condition..I have too much fire in my chakra!!!:rofl:

Welcome to SSP dawgmom! We will introduce you soon to all the sacred rites of Big Yak in this group!
(Me being the primary evil Big Pharma shill for Big Yak..):hi:

[dawgmom]

7. You know, I thought that about you from the first time I met you

"That girl has too much fire in her chakra, yes indeed. She needs somebody to douse that fire."

Is that one of the things that dousers do? I'm so confused. All this science is HARD.

[frogmarch]

2. or whistle on the

Irish whistle, like I do! Irish whistle whistlers have plenty of both yin and yan.



no, that's not me. :-)

[dawgmom]

5. Yikes! That is the Dizzy Gillespie of the Irish Whistle

I think that's a good plan. If that doesn't work, maybe somebody could suggest some kind of homeopathic remedy.

[frogmarch]

8. haha, it sure is, isn't it? :-) By the way,

I forgot to say welcome to the Skeptics Group, dawgmom. Welcome! :hi:

Edited to add that he's doing some circular breathing there. It's tricky - and I'm sure it's not easy on face lifts.

[dawgmom]

9. Thanks! You can blame turtlensue for leading me here. n/t

[mr blur]

16. We blame her for everything.

Welcome!

An album you must have in your collection:

[cosmik debris]

3. I can help you for $59.95

Just send me your exact location and I will remotely view your aura to determine your yin/yang balance.

For another $59.95 (plus S & H) I'll send you a special dietary supplement shown to correct the yin imbalance and align your chakra while you sleep.

But that's not all! You also get my special Quantum Energy Field Cleanser with 100% natural ingredients. Absolutely FREE!

:)

[dawgmom]

6. Will that work if I'm wearing magnets in my shoes?

And will I need to take off this copper bracelet?

[cosmik debris]

12. It's guaranteed

But you need to be at least 6 feet from any power crystals.

And did I mention that it's biodegradable.

[dawgmom]

13. Oh, dear. It will take me a while to clear out all my power crystals

Not sure where I'll put them. Oh, I know....in my pyramid!

[onager]

15. I'm in Egypt. You better avoid those cheap Western pyramids.

One Acolyte stored her crystals in a cut-rate American pyramid from eBay. The next day, her crystals had changed into a lump of camel dung.

I am writing this from one of the absolute dog-damn vortices of Ancient Quantum Magic--Alexandria, Egypt. Just a few km from where I sit, the corpse of Alexander The Great lies somewhere underground, just humming away with psychic energy.

I can, of course, also call on the energy fields of former Alexandria residents like Cleopatra, Marc Antony, and Julius Caesar. Who, before he ran afoul of that psychic prophecy about the Ides of March, very nearly drowned in Alexandria's Western Harbor. I did that in one of my past lives, as a court magician to Cleopatra. Just so you know you are dealing with a professional here, I arranged for my ex-brother-in-law to spend one of his past lives with Cleopatra. Emptying royal-chamber pots.

As you no doubt know, venerable magiKians and sorcerers from around the world learned their craft by checking out books from the Ancient Wisdom room of the famous Alexandria Library. Few people know that the penalty for overdue scrolls was being turned into a donkey.

Here's some great news, for a fortunate few Acolytes--I can sell you a donkey descended directly from one of those Ancient Unfortunate Seers! Available in grey or brown, you pay the shipping and fodder.

For the best-quality pyramids, I must astrally project myself to the real Giza Pyramids. I can do this pretty quickly (they're only 200 km away) but the psychic cost is tremendous. No worries, I'll just add it to the bill at current exchange rates.

You'll receive a perfect replica of the Great Pyramid of Cheops. For a nominal fee, I will make sure it's grid-aligned by a professional. The last amateur who tried that accidentally summoned up the ancient Egyptian god Sobek. Sobek has the head of a crocodile and tends to be a mite cranky, so I recommend you go with a pro.

My pyramids are the ONLY ones demonstrating the ancient and little-known ties between Egyptian Quantum Magic, the Wisdom of the Far East, and the prophecies of ancient Remote Viewers who correctly predicted the rise of the Western nations. That's why your pyramid is engraved with the inscrutable phrase--"Made In China."

[dawgmom]

22. Who are you who are so wise in the ways of science? n/t

[onager]

23. Just trying to help. I accept all major CCs and PayPal..

:hi:

Oh, I forgot to welcome you to the group. So welcome! You're off to a good start.

Here, let me show you around....

“'But I don’t want to go among mad people,' Alice remarked.

'Oh, you can’t help that,' said the Cat. 'We’re all mad here. I’m mad. You’re mad.'

'How do you know I’m mad?' said Alice.

'You must be,” said the Cat. 'or you wouldn’t have come here.'”

[dawgmom]

24. Thanks. I couldn't think of a more perfect welcome. n/t

[WhollyHeretic]

25. "align your chakra"? That is utter gibberish. I can't believe I'm reading that here.

You cannot "align" chakra. You can shift a chakra's harmonic resonance to meld with the universal equation. Simple physics prove this to be true. I can do that for only $58.95.

[Orrex]

4. I suggest that you eat more saltines to stop the yinsanity

It'll clear up your whistling problem in a jiffy.

[TZ]

10. *rimshot*

You will be here all week right? (I really need to find that rimshot smilie for you..its poifect)
On edit: found it...

[Orrex]

14. Locking

No sex threads, you pev.

[dawgmom]

11. I'm writing all this down. These are all great ideas.

So, you said Jiffy peanut butter on my crackers? I want to make sure I get the right prescription.

[Random_Australian]

17. Welcome to the dark side! We have milk and cookies and an appreciation of both.

We'll send them over in the black helicopter (yak piloted, of course) that we use to implant mind-control devices when people give blood. Also, this same yak made all vaccines evil. Of course, there's no harm in believing crap like that. (or so I read in the lounge)

[Evoman]

18. My problem is the oppositie....I have too much yang.

I have a really big yang. My girlfriend complains about it all the time. "Evoman, can you put your yang back where it belongs, the floor doesn't need to be dusted".

I've thought about going to see a yang specialist to see if I can get a reduction. It's a yin-yin situation if I do. My girlfriend is happy, and I'm happy as a result of my girlfriend being happy.

Although, part of me would feel bad about having a smaller yang. I'm afraid all the other psychics in the chakra room will make fun of me.

[TZ]

19. .

Thats your WANG you fool!:rofl: :hi:

[Evoman]

20. YOU WASH YOUR FILTHY MOUTH.

WHY, I NEVER...........!!!!!!!

:evilgrin:

[realisticphish]

21. Locking: Yang Thread

[LeftishBrit]

26. Interesting theory!

I am reminded of the old and rather sexist rhyme:

"Whistling girls and crowing hens
Always come to some bad ends."

Maybe this should be adapted:

"Whistling girls and whistling boys
Have an imbalance, causing noise.
Whistle outdoors, or whistle in,
It proves that you have too much yin!
You'd better get a bit more yang,
Or else I fear you're born to hang!"

[onager]

27. Ha! Thanks!

You are the Poet Laureate of the Skeptics Group. Of course, some people would consider that damning with very faint praise.