Hey, where's Heddi?

[trotsky]

ZOMG, did the ORBES finally take her away??!?

[uppityperson]

1. she's probably out watching the moon deteriorate

[trotsky]

2. Moon rape cheerleaders, all of you!

Won't someone think of its feelings?!?!?

[Codeine]

3. She's stuck in a fishbowl

with David Bowie.

[onager]

25. Well, then we should serenade her appropriately...

...Gets me to the church on time,
Church on time - terrifies me
Church on time - makes me party!
Church on time - puts my trust in God and man,

God and man - no confessions
God and man - no religion
God and man - I don't believe in modern love...

[Heddi]

4. I AM IN FLORIDUHHHHHHHHHHH now

I moved from Seattle because I forgot what heat felt like since I haven't lived in the south for 10 years. Oh yeah, heat good. mosquitoes and roaches the size of a chevy not so good.

So on the way down here...we drove from Seattle...zzzz...I got in a WRECK in ATLANTA because PEOPLE IN ATLANTA DRIVE LIKE MORONIC MANIACS and I TOTALED OUR JETTA WAGON omg! It was totally frightening. We're okay though...only the back end was damaged but it was considered a total losss ANNDDDNDNDDNNDND it's considered a hit n run for reasons that infuriate me too much to get into SOOOOO i'm not at fault Andndndndndn we ended up getting about $3k more for the car than we paid for it heh.

Sooooo we've been in St Pete for a week, that's where we live now. Man, it's hot down here. And people are fugly. I forgot that about the south. (hey I'm from SC so I can make statements like that without being regionalist or whatever).

We got a new Jetta yesterday, and we start work in like 3 weeks at a hospital down here.

AND!!! we are getting paid more than we did in Seattle (Mr. Heddi is a nurse too OMG!) but we're paying about 1/2 what we did for rent and instead of a condo the size of a mouse house, we have a real house with a yard and lizards and blue jays.

I've been reading all the fun, sorry not participating. Too much stuff to do!!!

I'll show pictures of the wrecked car later. I SWEAR IT WAS ORBES THAT MADE ME CRASH omg!wtf! lol.

Oh yah and I went to a FLEA MARKET the other day for the first time in TEN YEARS omg! it smelled like sweat, gasoline, and stale cigarettes!!!11!! I wanted some boiled peanuts but they didn't have any :( so I settled for deep fried lard instead.

Love you !!!

Oh and for the record, that whole thing about the moon and periods was just SOFA KING WE TODD DID! seriously. I had a black eye then, and was depressed about the car because I didn't know if our insurance was gonna go up to 10 billion dollars a month, but I laffed at many of the responses. That was funny and sad. Mostly sad, but you guys/gals made it funny. :)

[trotsky]

5. I knew it, I sent you positive healing energy!

Thus you survived your wreck!

OK, I remember you saying you were moving but didn't realize it was so soon. Glad you are OK and "enjoying" Florida, sorry but this Minnesota boy would melt in that climate.

Save me some boiled peanuts though! Those are TEH AWESOME.

[realisticphish]

6. same here, but Ohio

I can stand about 3 months of heat... then winter comes, and I can be happy again.

Plus, I'm a fat guy, and it's a LOT easier to dress nicely as a fat guy when it's cool out.

[Heddi]

10. I forgot about how pasty I was

In seattle I was with "My people" of pasty, doughy folks. Now I'm here in the land of sun and fun and I look like a pasty fat girl in Florida, Iguess.

BUTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT i got my VERY FIRST SUNBURN in about 10 years so I'm fitting in quite well!!! Now I just need to forget to use my blinker when I drive, and I'll totally fit in . Oh I need a mullett. I gotta get one of those.

[realisticphish]

11. be sure to replace your car door

with one painted "primer red" or "primer grey"

[trotsky]

16. ZOMG, you will now have no health problems anymores!!!

Because you have all that SUN to get your Vitamin D! I think you will find that even your butt won't itch anymore thanks to the magick of sunshine!

[salvorhardin]

17. Are you suggesting we need to drop trou and point my behind at big yellow glowy thing?

Won't mooning the sun mess up my astrological profile?

[trotsky]

18. Not if you ask the moon first. n/t

:P

[Heddi]

21. OMG! WTF! LOL

my butt never itches BECAUSE I HAVE VITAMINE D!

[csziggy]

28. The best smoked mullet is from a place out on Treasure Island

Oh wait - did you mean the mullet haircut? Nevermind...

[Heddi]

9. I HEAR YOUR VIBES LOUD AND CLEAR

omg! Perhaps you should have been VIBING ME when I was DRIVING in ATLANTA TRAFFIC omg. those people should be having their LICENSE REMOVED because THEY CANNOT DRIVE.....seriously. Craziest shit I ever done seen, and I done seen some crazy shit. Even when I was doing 65 (in a 55 zone) I was being passed by everyone else who was doing....80...90?? I don't even know.

It made me long for the stretches through Utah and Wyoming and that other state filled with nothing...nebraska? I don't remember. Anyway, I did 86mph the entire drive through Why?oming! and never even saw another person I don't think. Lots of cows and fences.....

We should have a Skeptical Cruise> That would be fun! We can all get together and play bingo and spend $8 on a bottle of budweiser! And get sunburned and wear socks and sandals. IT WOULD BE A BLAST omg.

Oh and we can stay at my place.... Ihave 3 bedrooms ANDDDDD a detached garage that we can stuff some folks in too. Also there are lizards everywhere here. LETS TOTALLY DO IT OMG!WTF! LOL!

[onager]

7. Aw, you saw my relatives!

And people are fugly. I forgot that about the south.

Well, THIS apple didn't fall far from that tree...

(hey I'm from SC so I can make statements like that without being regionalist or whatever).

From SC myself! Stop in and see my kinfolks sometime. Here, I'll give you very simple directions:

1. Take SC Exit #1 off Interstate-85.

2. Drive until you hear "Dueling Banjos."

Take care of your Heddi-selves and remember how SERIOUSLY they take their Jebus down there.

[Heddi]

8. oh yeah

we bought a new JETTA from these really nice folks on Craigslist...it was seriously the only car made after 1994 for sale on Craigslist. No, I don't want a Mark IV with 250k miles for $250, thank you. Anyhoo, very nice people that invited us to their church about 20 times as the car sale transaction was taking place.

I kept finding creative ways of changing the subject. I was afraid if I told them the TROOFH they would have yanked the title out of my hand and I'd be stuck driving that shitty rental Carolla for the rest of my life. What a fuckin' boat that thing was and blind spot from HELL omg. wtf. lol.

The new Jetta is very sporty, and has TripTronic gears. I don't know what that means, but it cost about $2000 more than if it didn't have TripTronic whatever.

I think the fuglyness comes from the heat. THe heat here is different than Charleston heat. And the bugs, too, seem larger. I think the heat and the bugs have done something with the genetics of the folks down here. Again, I'm from Charleston so i can say these things without, you know, being called insensitive or whatever.

And my kin live up the road from yours. They live in the trailer on the road paved with oyster shells...theirs is missing part of the underskirting...perhaps you've seen it....they have the toilet out front with some plants growing in it, and some of those creepy "kids in the corner" dolls scattered around trees, etc..... :shudder:

[uppityperson]

13. You moved away from here?

awwwwwww

[Heddi]

22. yeah....now I'm 3200 miles away

of course had to leave during the nicest part of the year. Everyone's like "Uh, why didn't you move in November, or during shitty weather?" and we had to wonder that ourselves, too.....

[TZ]

14. Hey Heddi!

I caught bits and snatches of your great cross country adventure on FB...sounds like you had a "blast" NOT! I was curious about the car issue. Sorry to hear about that...the first time I visited a friend in Atlanta we nearly got into a wreck from an idiot driver like 10 minutes after she picked me up from the airport.:eyes: as for Florida...I love summer/hot weather.. I think we should have a mid winter skeptical conference..:)

[Warpy]

19. I didn't have to worry about wrecks in Atlanta

because I hit it at 5 PM on an August Friday and cars were barely creeping forward through most of the city. If the 95 degree heat and humidity to match didn't get me, the fumes in those tunnels had a good shot at it. It took me an hour and a half to get through that damn town.

On the way home, I drove the length of Alabama just to avoid Atlanta. Fortunately, my battered pickup truck (with no AC, by the way) provided me adequate cover and I doubt anybody noticed the New Mexico plates on it.

Florida hot weather is very different, by the way. The air is heavy with humidity and my mother described it as trying to live under a suffocating layer of heavy, wet woolen blankets.

I'm glad it's Heddi and not me.

[TZ]

20. that GA trip was in July

That humidity is Baaad...way worse than DC..I figure that's why Southerners talk slower..

[mr blur]

15. My Demon will send you Tanning Energy

from his all-healing Orbe.

[Heddi]

23. OMG ORBES!11!

I WAS IMPREGMATED BY ORBEs@!!!! I AM STILL GESTICULATING THE ORBE BABBYS!!11!!

[bluedawg12]

12. Sending healing light and energy

for your late Jedda, or...is it Jeddi!11!!?

[Heddi]

24. I FEEL YORU VIBES BLUE!

I NEED SOME REIKEY TO UNDO MY SUNBURN!11 I was tyring to INCRASE my VITAMEN D and now I look like a LOBSTER!!!

[onager]

26. Your neighbors can help...

http://www.drbukk.com/gmhom/gmindex.html

[LeftishBrit]

27. Good to see you!

If you can avoid the eeeeeeevil vaccines, you will be fine!