Wow, I had no idea you were here this whole time.

[gardenista]

I am being pulled back to the Catholic church after being away for many years.

Have any of you returned to the church after a long absence (I don't want to call it a lapse), and if so, how did you go back?

Did you just start attending church again, or did you speak with the priest and talk about why you left, and why you are coming back?

I don't know what to do about my conflicted feelings over gay rights, abortion, stem cell research, and the role the church has played in the destruction of indigenous populations.

Despite all that, the pull is there and it's strong.

[AngryOldDem]

1. Hello!

You might want to check with your archdiocese -- mine sponsors a program called Come Home, which is a series of listening sessions where those who have been away from the Church can come and express their views, get questions/concerns/issues addressed, and hopefully confirm their desire to return to the Church. It's conducted with clergy and laypeople (I know someone who facilitates), and it is a very safe and neutral environment -- no arguments, no judgments, etc. The questions you have would make this program ideal for you, I think, provided that your archdiocese has something similar in place.

Barring that, I'm sure a priest would be glad to sit down and talk with you -- if you don't feel comfortable with that, try a pastoral associate.

Welcome to the forum, and good luck and godspeed on your journey!

ON EDIT: Wording.

[gardenista]

3. Thank you for the information on the Come Home program.

I had heard about the program, and I believe there is one in my diocese. I'm glad to hear that it is a non-judgemental environment. I also want to talk to other Catholics who share my views on abortion, birth control and gay rights.

Thanks again for your good wishes and encouragement.

[Hans Delbrook]

7. I don't know exactly what your beliefs are but ...

I certainly find the Church's stance on "artificial" birth control perplexing. (All those years they told us your intent was more important than your actions yet it's OK to use a calendar to prevent conception but not a condom? I just don't get it. And I've talked to an "expert" at length about it.)

And I really wish the Church was more accepting of homosexuality. Hate the sin and love the sinner just doesn't cut it for me.

As for abortion - I'm not really for making it illegal in the first trimester but I do think it's stopping a human life - a step that should be taken only as a last resort. After the first trimester I don't think it should be done at all - unless the life of the mother is at stake.

But I'm still a practicing Catholic and despite several crises of Faith I believe I always will be. Welcome back if you decide that's what you want to do!

[gardenista]

8. Thanks. Our views sound pretty similar.

Maybe I'm a little further away from the Church on birth control and abortion. I am actually fervently *for* legal abortion in the first trimester, but believe, also that after the firt trimester, there must be a very good reason for abortion, and I want that broadly defined.

I have my doubts as to whether I can be accepted in the Church. I will continue to explore it. I'm glad to hear that it continues to work for you, despite some crises of faith.

[AngryOldDem]

10. Many of us share your doubts.

You ain't alone there. That's why faith is always a journey.

[ElectroPrincess]

11. Exactly. It's very challenging for us who came to the faith through

RCIA. I was raised agnostic and Baptized in the Catholic Church in 96'. I feel that I'm learning more through my 10 year old about our faith because many of my teachers assumed that "all of us" were raised Christian. My daughter's religious education is also mine ... we pray and study for her weekly quizzes and tests together.

My crisis of faith lasted from 2000 to 2003 during which time I returned to my Agnostic "comfort zone." I wish the RCIA program would screen new members in order to provide those of us without Christian Roots more knowledge of "the basics."

[gardenista]

13. Thank you. It's been an eye-opening experience hearing from everyone

on this thread. It feels "safer" to talk this out here before I take the next step.

[Beer Snob-50]

2. hello!!

i left the church for a while in the 80's and then i met a priest who talked to the congregation in a way that we could understand. some friends of mine (good irish catholics) talked me into going to hear him give mass and i started up after that. i went to confession and he strongly suggested i start to wear condoms. not many priests ever do that. but i have stayed with the church ever since.

[gardenista]

4. Now that's the kind of priest I want! Problem is, that may be hard to

find.

Glad to hear of your experience. Gives me hope. Thanks!

So that was three Hail Marys and a pack of Trojans? LOL

[Beer Snob-50]

5. yes that was my penance!!!

[Cuban_Liberal]

6. I think you may find the American church to be welcoming.

Although I never left, many of my gay/bi- friends did; many have since returned and been pleasantly surprised to find in the Church a loving, welcoming and essentially non-judgmental 'home'. As our rector has often said, "It is my duty as a priest to teach and to preach, but there is no duty to judge."

:)

[gardenista]

9. Thanks. That gives me hope. But how do you feel about the fact that

you could not marry in the Church?

Do you ever think it will change?

[demosincebirth]

12. Many of us have doubts and crisises' of faith..

even the great saints had 'em. Believe me, I'm no saint and I love my Church, even with all it's fallabilities.

[gardenista]

14. Oh yeah, I don't have to be a saint. I forgot about that.

I really mean it. And that's a good thing, because that would be very hard for me!

Makes me think about Thomas, the doubter.