I wish I could figure what causes periodic episodes of feelings

[yy4me]

of helplessness. Every once and a while it hits me and I cannot to do much of anything in order to snap out of it.

This past year has been terrible for me. I take an antidepressant and am usually OK and can cope but today is one of those 'what the heck is wrong with me' days.

I wondered if I should post this note in the Seniors forum--maybe it's my age, Maybe it's the fact that I am sick of looking for a job but dependent on extended benefits to supplement my SS check. I keep looking but nothing much appears that I can do. Can't volunteer because I have to keep up the job search. I'm tired of if the horrible weather we're having. Rain, rain, rain.

Yesterday we had a nice day so I was able to do some outside work on the house. I've had to learn to do things that my husband used to do. Thats fine, I can learn. Today I wanted to continue but it is pouring and I can't.

I find that my interests differ from those of my friends and don't do much with any of them since my husband died.

Maybe I'm not alone in this. Maybe it is loneliness.

Maybe I'm just feeling sorry for myself.

[Forkboy]

1. I think we all wish we knew what causes them.

Some people can identify certain triggers for depression, but apparently I'm not one of them.

I doubt it's your age, but the other reasons sound likely. And I think that those things would get a lot of people down (well, the rain part doesn't effect me as I love it, but I'm as crazy as a box of frogs). Today sounds like a perfect storm of things that have been bothering you all bubbling up at once. It sucks that you can't get outside to do some work as it not only takes your mind of some these troubles, but it also makes you feel good for getting stuff done.

I can totally relate to you having different interests than most people. A lot of my interests are definitely out of the norm, whether it's my taste in music or movies or just my general outlook on the world. I look normal on the outside, but normalcy is only skin deep in my case. :)

I'm not a social creature and enjoy being alone so it's hard for me to comment on loneliness. I feel it sometimes, but rarely for long (usually just going to the store reminds me of why I like being alone). But it sounds like it may be part of what you're feeling, and it's totally understandable.

As for feeling sorry for yourself, I'm a strong believer that it's ok to do just that some days. Life isn't always this wonderful thing, and it can really pile on at times. There's nothing wrong with taking a day or two every now and then to ask, "Why me?". I never get an answer, but I still ask sometimes.

I hope you feel better soon, and that the sun comes out where you are (and you can keep it!).

:hug:

[yy4me]

2. You too from MA? Thanks Forkboy for your kind words. You

certainly know what I mean by the rain, rain, rain.

This feeling will pass, I've had it before during this past year. I wish I could recognize the trigger so I could avoid it if I can.

[Forkboy]

3. I've never seen a June like the one we just had.

It rained for what...22 days out of the month? And even since then summer hasn't been very summery. As a winter guy I don't really mind, but I know a lot of people who get down over it, and I know it sucks for them.

[mopinko]

4. how are you sleeping?

weird things can affect your sleep, and sure can mess you up. i have been feeling crummy the last couple months after having a good year and a half. i couldn't figure out why. doc messed with the meds. then it hit me- i have been battling acid reflux which is irritating my asthma. i have been waking up short of breath and coughing. big fat doh. getting scoped on thursday and hoping for some answers.
after that i am seeing a sleep doc. i sleep so much, and am tired the rest of the time. hoping that i can get a few more functional hours a day. i know it will make a huge difference.

hope your blues pass quickly.

[yy4me]

5. For years I have had major troubles sleeping. I have Restless

Leg Syndrome and sometimes I have to just give up and walk around for a while, go back and try again. I have medication for it that sometimes helps the sleep. Allergies are a problem for me but there is nothing I can do. That seems strange,I can take medication but I have trouble clearing my head because of internal scar tissue resulting from surgery when I was a kid and had been in a car accident.

The best thing in the world is a good nights sleep and when that happens I am my old self again.

I would be a good candidate for one of those studies but I'm my age and distance to major hospitals is a deterrent.

The blues hit me every so often. Yesterday was a bad one. Much better today.

[fizzgig]

6. you're not alone

it sounds like you've had the perfect storm right now and i'm willing to be the constant rain has something to do with your mood.

i've found that getting out of the house for even a little bit helps my mood, even if it's going to the coffee shop with my book for an hour or so.

i hope you get to feeling better quickly.

[david13]

7. I don't know either.

Getting out, going for something, anything, makes me feel better, too.
Sometimes the self fulfilling prophecy works for me. Helping someone else, taking on a new activity, fixing something, journey and destination. Set a journey to go on and go.
Age for me is a part of it. We all know we are getting older and will be more dependent. We all know our health is on the decline, but acceptance is the key.
Love helps too. I guess I love my cat. No matter how feeble I am becoming, he is dependent on me, and demanding too.
He keeps me from going off the deep end.
dc