Questioning one's faith and (possibly) getting it back.

[gatorboy]

Hello everyone. It's my first time in this section of the DU so please be gentle. :)

Lately I've been feeling lost and questioning my faith. I'm not sure if it's because I'm getting older or if it's the environment we live in. Either way it's been depressing. I know there are no magic words to help me out here. It's something I'll have to work out on my own (Unless you have magic words that help then let's hear'em!). But I was curious as to whether there were any similar situations here and was interested in hearing them. Maybe some stories of others who got lost and found their way back. Perhaps this is a normal occurance in most people's lives and I don't realize it? HELP!

Anyway, thanks for listening (er, reading) in advance. :)


Chris

[gatorboy]

1. Did I miss the rapture or something?

[supernova]

2. Yes, that's it

we've all be raptured. :P

Seriously, for any thoughtful person, periods of reflection about one's beliefs are perfectly normal. And frankly I wouldn't want to be in relationship with a Being who didn't want that for me.

What often replaces it is often a rebuilt faith better able to withstand the sturm und drang of life. Perhaps you change your beliefs, perhaps you join a different organization or take up a cause. Either way, it's a journey worth taking simply because it is yours and no one elses.

[ayeshahaqqiqa]

3. I think it is quite common

In my tradition, there is a saying, "Shatter your ideals on the Rock of Truth". The idea behind it is that, at different stages of life, we have certain notions of ourselves and our relationship with God. As we mature and have different experiences, they have an effect on our faith.

I'll give myself as an example:

I was raised in the Methodist Church, and took the teachings of Jesus quite seriously. At that time, I felt that the Resurrection of Christ was most important because that alone assured us eternal life. Then, at age 13, my mother gave me a book called "The Passover Plot", which gave a possible explanation for what happened to Jesus on the cross-that it was a conspiracy where Jesus would be drugged, appear to die, and then be cut down only to "rise again". Reading this shook me to the core of my beliefs. I didn't think it was true, but what if it was? What did that mean to my faith? I took a hard look at my beliefs, and realized that I was seeing religion as a magical way to cheat death and nothing more. I went through a time of introspection, and came back with a new set of beliefs, a new faith, as it were: what mattered wasn't that you would live forever-what mattered was how you lived your life here and now. I looked carefully at what Jesus taught about actions, puzzling over many parables, grasping others immediately. And I started trying my best to live the teachings. It had a transformational effect upon me, and started me on an inner journey that continues to this day.


Since that time, I've had many times of doubt, and many changes of faith. At this point in time, I'm a Sufi initiate, but I also know that this isn't the end for me spiritually; I have many avenues to explore and many more steps to take on my path. As I have just entered menopause, I am finding the melding of physical and spiritual changes very interesting.

[skater314159]

4. Welcome gatorboy!

We're glad to have you here...

And yes you're right... this is something that you will have to work out on your own, as there are no "easy answers". But just a word of comfort, many great leaders have their own experience with what St. John of the Cross called "The Dark Night of the Soul". Recent news has been atwiter over Mother Theresa having just such an experience... I am thankful that Mother Theresa's writings have been made public, as they can speak to the millions of people who are having their own similar experiences.

I think one problem is that in America today, the parties that have the most say in the religious discourse, do not allow for either growth or doubt in the religious experience. For many Americans, faith has become a matter of instantly "being saved" rather than a lifelong journey of growth and introspection. Individuals are told that doubt is the enemy... but in matters of faith, it is certainty that is often the problem (as it is often only enjoyed by fundamentalists.

Anyway, we are here to help you and support you through this desert experience of yours, and we are glad you have joined us!

Some links that might be helpful:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dark_Night_of_the_Soul">About the Dark Night of the Soul at Wikipedia

http://books.google.com/books?id=69CyQCuBiTgC&dq=&pg=PP1&ots=8F9KU6C4Dn&sig=d2SOHSWGkvSxHuN0gWjQoD01_hQ&prev=http://www.google.com/search%3Fq%3Ddark%2Bnight%2Bof%2Bthe%2Bsoul%26rls%3Dcom.microsoft:en-ca:IE-SearchBox%26ie%3DUTF-8%26oe%3DUTF-8%26sourceid%3Die7%26rlz%3D1I7GFRC&sa=X&oi=print&ct=title#PPP1,M1">The Book Online

Peace! :hippie:

[leftyladyfrommo]

5. What is making you question your faith?

Is it some particular issue - like human suffering and all the other awful stuff that goes on unchecked in this world?

Is it a loss of some sort of presence? Or loss of the feeling of a presence? A hollow feeling of emptiness in this universe? Empty rhetoric?

I'm just curious. Not trying to be rude or invasive here.

[CBHagman]

6. gatorboy, you might appreciate this letter write's point of view.

It's possible you have been following the news reports and discussion about Mother Teresa's experience of doubt, depression, dark night of the soul, prolonged inability to sense the presence of God, or call it what you will. Among Catholics there was already discussion of this unexpected revelation, but the press seems to have just begun reacting to it, probably due to the publication of some of her letters.

Anyway, here's how one reader responded to a New York Times article on the subject:

http://www.nytimes.com/2007/09/03/opinion/l03teresa.html?_r=1&oref=slogin

Thanks to James Martin for pointing to the complexity of Mother Teresa’s spiritual quest, which to some may seem a scandal. It is worth considering that faith’s opposite is not doubt. Faith that is genuinely healthy has the courage to doubt and ask questions, especially in the face of the world’s suffering.

Every relationship has its “dark nights” — even one with the divine. Mother Teresa’s life, as Mr. Martin notes, also exemplifies the living aspect of faith, something sorely needed in a society where Christian identity is most often defined in terms of what a person believes rather than how he or she lives. Shouldn’t it be the other way around?

Krista E. Hughes

[TreasonousBastard]

7. Perfectly normal, and I even hear that...

such doubt is quite common in seminaries.

Faith unquestioned is really no faith at all, just rote learning-- like the multiplication tables, but far less useful. Doubt can go either way, and loss of faith is a real possiblity. However, what faith remains is stronger and reasoned-- better able to survive, and even to lead, into the future.

[RevCheesehead]

8. I like this answer.

I think that doubt is an opportunity for growth, and when those times arise, I embrace them. I know I'll come out of it stronger than before. :)

[gatorboy]

9. Thanks one and all for your support.

To answer the question why I feel this way, I couldn't quite tell you. It just suddenly hit me like a rush of chilled water. And ever since, I've thought about it almost daily. But I'm glad to hear this is normal. Thanks again for everyone's thoughts.:)

[democrat2thecore]

10. Faith - in and of itself - has a slice of doubt

But at the end of the day, faith usually wins out. Think of getting on an airplane. You do it on faith alone. You have FAITH that the mechanics were done properly, the pilot is competent, the makers of the plane knew what they were doing. Doubt and worry may enter your mind - but in the end - you get on the plane and, with faith, go on with your journey.