How do you handle people who try and get you to go to church with them?

[NMDemDist2]

(cross posted from the Lounge)

In this new (to me) small town it seems like if I talk to anyone for more than 10 minutes, they are asking me to come to church with them.

Now don't get me wrong, I have nothing against people who go to church, but it isn't my cup of tea at all.

some of my new neighbors are getting pretty pushy about it and I'd hate to tell em what I really think like "I like your Christ, but haven't seen much of Christians that I'd like to be a part of" or Sorry, religion just gets in the way of my spirituality I've found" or "Do they let Taoist/Pagans in?"

:rofl:

How do you handle pushy Christians?

[beam me up scottie]

1. Just tell them you're not a christian.

When they ask if you're a (insert name of religion here), nod your head and agree with them.

Just think about how much fun they'll have when they compare notes later. :D


Seriously, that's how I handled my well-meaning neighbors when I moved here. They seemed to be content with that and I didn't offend anyone.

[NMDemDist2]

2. GOOD ANSWER!!

:rofl:

[otherlander]

3. "Jewish? She told me she was Hindu!"

"Who told you that? That nice Muslim lady?"
:rofl:

[blueDachi]

5. I have found that

at times simply saying, "No thank-you but thanks for asking," in a sincere but casual way has been enough to end that line of inquisition. If they push it by asking where I attend my responses have been varied, tailored to the situation. I might say that I've done the church thing before and I'm pretty much done with that now (which is true).

Sometimes I've just wrinkled up my nose like from a slight odor and said, "Eh, church is not really my thing - I prefer nature as my cathedral or I can't sit still that long." I've also said that I do my meditations then or that I'm a member of a meditation group. Never mind that what we were doing might not be construed by others strictly as meditation or that we never met on Sundays. Depending on the person I might be more blunt. I have said before that I don't believe in church because it's not healthy for my soul.

Any response can invite more inquiry and I usually try and be prepared for that. I usually try and deflect and be politic in my initial response but, depending on my mood, sometimes I like to take a more active role in "reversing the flow" of the proselytizing. :)

p.s. Sorry, response was meant to go for original post. Oopsy! :)

[stellanoir]

4. One way would be similar to the way I deal with those intrusive people

who ask. . ."Have you accepted Christ as your personal saviour?" I always answer that question with a question and say, "Isn't that kind of personal?"

But more specifically to your quandary, I would probably say "I'm very private about my faith and feel closest to my creator when I walk in the beauty of nature so if ever you may wish to take a walk with me I'd be more than happy to share with you."

Again, I'm reminded of the Simpsons episode where Flanders tells Homer that Maude is away at Bible camp to learn to become more judgemental.

[NMDemDist2]

6. "Have you accepted Christ...." my stock response is

"I agree with Ghandi on that one, I like your Christ fine but I don't like many of the Christians I meet."

:evilgrin:

[NMMNG]

7. I politely decline

I was visiting my family last week and my sister (who knows very well I'm an atheist) asked if I'd like to go to church with her. I paused for a moment wondering what posessed her to ask, then simply said, "no thank you".

[havocmom]

8. From a great distance

Used to try being polite. Even went with some to their church then gave them an honest telling of how unwelcomed the pastor made me feel.

Now I just send them down the road.

[ayeshahaqqiqa]

9. I say

thank you, but I have my own church. Doesn't matter that my church is my home altar, at which I meditate and pray. That really isn't their business. I've found by using the term "church" to mean my spirituality puts things in terms they understand, and they leave me alone.

[TreasonousBastard]

10. Are they really pushy, or just offering a...

friendly invite?

We all have problems with evangelists out there trying to save our souls, but since I'm one of those people who regularly invite others to come to the Quaker meetings and UU churches I attend, I have a slightly different view.

A church is often not a soul-saving factory or money machine, but it is a local community in itself, more like a club. The invitation may not be so much an attempt to convert, but to look into the club and see what it has to offer. Religion itself may be the last thing on their minds-- they're doing what good neighbors do, inviting you to a party.

Now, yeah, if you absolutely don't want to have anything to do with any church, politely declining is the answer, but showing up once to be nice and sociable-like isn't the worst thing in the world. It's not like you're gonna catch anything by walking in there. Just try to avoid the ones who think they snagged a fish and keep following you around. Best time to show up is when they're doing something special, not just the usual, often boring, Sunday service.

[SemperEadem]

11. tell them you're not interested.

it's none of their business why you're not. you don't owe them an explanation.

I have family who are like this. I can't be in their home for two hours without my sister in law asking me if I want to go to church with them. I tell her straight out 'No'. When she asks why, I say "because I dont' believe in your religion".