Is it possible for gentiles to attend synagogue these days?

[HamdenRice]

Hello, I would like to ask a question and I see other non-Jews have used this forum to do so.

My family -- my fiance, our son/step son and I are nominally Christian. I was raised Baptist and she was raised Catholic. We go to Baptist or Catholic church only occasionally. Our son (15) is at a questioning age and is interested in our attending services more regularly. He sometimes goes to a fundamentalist church that one of his former teachers invited him to, or to a fundie church his girlfriend attends (which by the way I'm not thrilled about).

When I was his age, I grew up in Queens, which was very diverse. I attended lots of Bar Mitzvahs and sometimes other synagogue services at the invitation of friends, as well as German Lutheran and Catholic services.

Even though we now live in Queens again and it is still diverse and he has diverse friends, it seems people don't invite each other across religious lines as they did in the 1960s when I was growing up. I would like for him to be exposed to other religions, so that he has no prejudices and gets an idea of how other communities worship.

In fact, I'm not even sure that other denominations and religions permit it these days. I have read stories of people curious about Islam being turned away from mosques, etc.

So my question is, is it possible to just attend the local reformed synagogue? Do you have to be invited? I understand that some kind of attendance fee is now mandatory -- is it collected in advance or is a plate passed? Do we have to buy yarmulkes? (As a kid, I remember the local reformed temple had a box of yarmulkes in the lobby for ecumenical visitor that you just popped on your head going in and left in the box going out.)

Thanks in advance for any comments on these questions or any other advice you might have.

[Debbi801]

1. Hi. Not sure about in NY, but where I am, you'd be welcomed...

I belong to a large Reform congregation and visitors are always welcomed to Shabbat services, no matter what their religion.

As far as yarmulkes go, no you do not have to buy one. There are generally yarmulkes out next to the prayer books. But, yarmulkes are not generally required at a Reform congregation--at least not any I've been to.

As far as the attendance fee, I have never seen that at any synogogue I've been to, Reform or otherwise. Generally members pay annual dues and make contributions in honor/memory of different people/events. I've never seen a plate, pot, etc.

Hope this helps.
Debbi

[ikojo]

4. Passing the collection plate, as is done several times during

an average Christian service, is not done during a Jewish service because one is not supposed to carry money on Shabbat.

To the original poster who asked about visitors to shul...by all means non Jews are welcome to a Jewish service. If you have questions you may want to call the synagogue office and tell the rabbi you are visiting that way he or she (if it's a Reform congregation) will set aside their time or have a knowledgeable congregant chat with you following the service.

At one of the large Reform congregations here in St Louis the rabbi will often ask if there are any visitors.

[leftynyc]

2. Fellow New Yorker here

Although not in Queens (Westchester - we're practically neighbors!) - the only time I've ever known there to be a fee is for services during the high holy days (Rosh Hoshashona and Yom Kippur) because the temples are packed for those. For a shabbat service (Friday night or Saturday morning), you can just walk in. Yarmulkes are usually right outside the door and many reform temples don't require them. I'm sure any rabbi would answer any questions you have and you will be welcome.

And may I wish you a Shabbat Shalom.

[HamdenRice]

3. Thanks -- and lefty it was the NYT that threw me off ..

thank you for the advice. I think it was a NY Times article about having to pay for high holiday services that gave me the mistaken impression about fees.