My Pondering

[MichaelHarris]

I ponder alot. So I'm sitting here trying to program my Logitech TV remote that does everything, even make my coffee in the morning. I'm still trying to find the button that massages my feet. While reading the manuals I thought,

"Since Haggart got the Falwell Beta-4 anti-homo vaccine I wonder if those that welcome this miraculous cure would let their kids go camping with him? Would all the church guys pack up the Areostar, make some sandwiches, kiss the wives goodbye and head for the great outdoors with him? Would Falwell have him over for an all night God session?"

Don't get me wrong, I'm all for medical science and religion joining hands in the lab and coming up with these miracle drugs but stuff like cancer seems higher on my list for a cure. Dwelling deeper into the "cure" I began to wonder,

"Is it IV? Maybe by mouth? No, that couldn't it, Haggart would need the higher dose that could only be administered anally. The medicines go to work faster I hear."

Looking into the Falwell Beta-4 anti-homo vaccine I found out it's a variant of the Swaggert Alpha- hydroxy compound that was once used for infidelity. The early tests on that were inconclusive, the subject seems to have disappeared. I'm pretty sure a combination of the Swaggert compound was mixed with the Baker 4-phenol hydroxide to form the Falwell Beta compound. The only tricky part is the incubation. For that they shove it up Pat Robertson's ass for six weeks, the temperature is key here.