>I missed that asshole-free post you made a while back
>but reading it brought tears to my eyes
>'cause it's so fucking true.
Yeah I was crying as I was talking to my shrink about it that day too.
>I wish we could. I really do, more than anything.
Me too,That's why I pour my heart out here.
>I don't know WHAT we can do. Asshole cancer is everywhere. I'm >trying to make my own little sustainable bubble with my tribe of >hearts.
You got the first part down,next you have to PROTECT it with clear boundaries.
People who are battered by this world have to learn how to connect with an INNER locus of control first.To accept necessary anger violence sometimes IS for a valid reason.
People need to learn to recognize abuse as abuse,stop projecting them self as if decent people are capable of doing horrors like raping a child.
To see an asshole as an asshole. Than to learn to destroy the asshole without guilt or regrets.Reinforce boundaries in any way that removes the assholes presence,from your space. Learn to become intolerant as hell of the intolerable and make clear boundaries and healthy expectations that others have to meet to be considered part of the haven,you have to accept a gatekeeper role and to close your heart to assholes ..and than be able to switch back to having a kind open heart to those of your tribe,and be kind to people until they reveal asshole traits and ruthlessly tear them down.Don't confuse your own self/community defense motives with a perpetrator's motive of choosing to be an asshole and abuse. Whenever you act in defense of your right to BE.And live Free from abuse.
You have to embrace not only your goodness but also your wickedness and viciousness and aim it at assholes,and be willing to admit when you miss the mark and apologize.It takes a fierce humility..
>Sometimes I understand the impulse of the Rapture crowd, but from a >totally different angle.
I understand that too.The difference is motives..The rapture crowd is driven by NARCISSISM and Vengeance based on sucking up a metaphysical bully/sugar daddy to vindicate them and give them power and exclude others from power,and prove themselves right and holier than thou.See god said so....
The Gnostic's were driven by a desire to be liberated from assholes,"archons"and the shackles upon the heart body and mind put there by Archons and to ease the sick conditions here that hurt life and find a way to go...home..to live in peace.
>That scares me. We gotta FIX this shit, pronto.
>But asshole cancer is just eating it alive.
Yeah it IS scary..
Sometimes you have to let the world go to save it.T'Maat Sekhmet.
Yep And as long as people keep on identifying and confusing who THEY are with assholes and empathizing with assholes who have no empathy,trying to pretend the world is just or karma exists they will never see what it is that abuses them let alone become the kind of tactical warrior and boundary keeper required to have an asshole free zone exist in this world.Assholes are drawn to asshole free zones like moths to a porch light. So boundaries MUST be clear and guarded,and assholes removed.
Here is an example of one kind of tactical asshole removal.Leaving somewhere I loved to save it..
I used to be a board member of a group called Hearts and Ears for awhile. While I was there I pointed out the ethical boundaries..So it stayed an asshole free zone for awhile.It was great until a new president got in there,he convinced the founder of H&E to relocate to a building he worked at(conflict of interest) and he exploited his power in that conflict,he started targeting board members for elimination that knew what the difference between top down power is VS grass roots power sharing and were boundary keepers.It was all very manipulative..
The founder was a trifle narcissistic and ethically stupid she was totally hoodwinked by this asshole creep she made 'president'.He became a little autocrat,and that sent me in the red flag zone.I warned the founder she ignored it. Soon those two wanted to expel me from the board because I didn't put up with bullshit from them. Especially when they seemed hell bent on turning a board position at H&E into some stupid egotistical power trip.
Soon they had a meeting to decide if I should be expelled from the board.
During the usual meeting part, Inwardly I was chanting Ta'maat Sekhmet.Roughly Truth to power or Truth is power.To keep myself centered.
Since I had gotten volunteer of the year the two years I attended there..I wasn't a slouch.So they had to find another excuse to give me Das Boot..Ironically the mentally ill founder of an organization for GBLT with mental illness ..pulled the mental illness card on me as her excuse.Pot,kettle,black? LAME.
I was asked by the other people on the board,why I still wanted to work with H&E and sure enough as I began to say why, I broke down, I was trying not to cry,but my heart just poured out and the vision of the safe haven from abusers how badly a place like that was needed by people who are GBLT and wounded already.I told them how I really felt.I hid nothing.
I spoke of grassroots power compared to top down bullshit,I said all of it.. The president and founder assholes didn't get enough votes to expel me from the board because it was only their two hands saying yea.It showed the whole board who the problem was really..But as I left I gave a cry of justice to H&E,T'MaatSekhmet Truth to Power & the boundary redrawn to Change or Die.And I walked out the door.I cried all the way home.I didn't go back there for around 9 months.When I did go back I got choked up that the big black glittery banner I had made for pride in '04 was hanging in the window,and ironically the doors of the new location have two big lion door knockers, is it Sekhmet protecting H&E?? I dunno interesting to speculate however.
Without the scapegoat(me)there the truth had to come out about who was corrupting power there.Because I sure as hell wasn't.It was one of the hardest things I have ever done to let go,walk away from the only asshole free zone I have ever seen on this Earth,leaving it to change or die, to save it from itself or let it destroy itself.
Hearts and Ears survived. They got rid of both the corrupt president(he was a thief too) and corrupted founder. Hearts and Ears wants me back on the board but I have no way to get there I miss the place...bad.It is a haven to me.
This is one example of dealing with corruption of power in a group setting. I had to TRUST myself and let go and trust in the vision of Hearts and Ears.
Heres a link to it.
http://www.heartsandears.org/