OMG everyone NEEDS to watch this!! Zombie GIs, stolen election...

[nodehopper]

Does anyone watch that series "Masters of Horror" on Showtime? I don't normally like horror movies, but last night my boyfriend said "I saved a horror movie for us to watch." Naturally, I scowled at him, because I figured he was just being sadistic because I hate horror movies, but he said that he was going to watch it by himself until he saw it being flamed on conservative websites, where people were saying "fucking liberals" and "George Bush isn't really like that."

OOOOOOOOOOHHHHH.

So I watched this one-hour segment called "The Homecoming" by Joe Dante.

What can I say? Except that it was the best thing ever. Few things are as satisfying as seeing your own deepest beliefs adapted for a pop culture medium.

So, the story is about a Republican presidential speech writer, whose mentor is "Karl Rove" (the character's initials are KR, I can't remember what his name is in the script), and his lover is Ann Coulter ("Jane Cleaver"). He goes on some weasel-pundit type show and faces off with "Cindy Sheehan," who was arrested for asking the President why her son had died. They talk about how no WMDs have been found, and the host "Marty" asks if the GIs are dying for nothing, and the speechwriter says "no, it's not like that...my own brother died in vietnam...if I could have one wish, I wish that woman's son could come back..." At this point he sort of spazzes and blanks out, then catches himself and blah blahs about how if the GIs came back, they would tell everyone how important it is to serve their country and how proud they were to make the sacrifice.

Less than 48 hours later, on an air base where flag-draped coffins have been delivered, a soldier patrols, hears noises that he things are photographers, yells that no photographs of dead soldiers are allowed, US Army policy, but instead is confronted by the sight of zombie GIs rising out of the coffins.

What do they want?

They want to vote. After they vote, they really die, for good.

At first "Ann Coulter" and "Karl Rove" are all over that, "Ann Coulter" goes on the talk show with some religious troglodyte and they are all, like, this is a miracle, and as per legality schmegality, who is going to tell these brave formerly deceased veterans that they can't vote?

Until, of course, it turns out they are not voting for "Bush." They are voting "for anyone who will end this evil war."

Then they get quarantined in orange jumpsuits and declared a public hazard and the same troglodyte and "Ann Coulter" are all, blah, gates of hell spewed them out, etc. etc.

Then there are some really touching moments (like "Karl Rove" emotionally blackmailing "Cindy Sheehan" using her resurrected son as bait or a couple whose son is in Iraq giving shelter to a zombie GI in their diner), some WHOA plot twists and at the end when the election is STOLEN (which is explicitly copped to), the zombie soldiers realize that their votes were not counted and "call for reinforcement." "Ann Coulter" gets her brains blown out while she is screaming "bring it on." By the end the zombies (who never harm anyone in the movie until they eat "Karl Rove" after they realize the election was fixed and their voices were not heard) take over DC to ensure that never again are soldiers set to die for "horseshit and elbow grease."

Seriously. I have not seen anything I enjoyed so much, well...ever.

If you at all have access to this, WATCH IT!