Reply #18: Power and Control

[Booberdawg]

FIRST! I don't think the vast majority of the men in DU are misogynist. As a whole I think the community of DU men are considerate and sensitive to the issues of sexism and misogyny.

I have a suspicion that misogyny is rooted in power and control issues. I base that on my own experiences and insights over my many years about people in general. I can't put my finger on a better way to explain myself other than to say that I believe men secure in their own masculinity, and perhaps sexuality, don't seem to be the ones displaying misogynist attitudes. I base that for the most part on my face to face observations over the years and not necessarily just here at DU.

Unfortunately it's the offenders who get the most notice and make the most noise. To me, it's telling in the G-R-E-A-T L-E-N-G-T-H-S some of the worst offenders will go to in order to justify, discount, and minimize misogynist comments when called to task on it.

I'm pretty middle of the road on this issue, as I am on most issues. I think there are extremes and over sensitivity on both sides of ANY issue. But, in no way am I suggesting that this or any other issue deserves to be discounted or minimized, or that it isn't a valid topic deserving of intelligent discussion, just because it results in viewpoints on the extreme ends of the spectrum.

In a message board setting in particular, I think people make comments that they would never make in a face to face setting. I also think some people don't really believe what they are typing but just like to stir shit. But for the most part I think there are people who might say something that they didn't intend to be offensive out of lack of insight, lack of empathy, or ignorance on the particular topic, and these people benefit from being shown another point of view. That's where I think most people, men and women alike, fall in DU.

I don't think misogyny is limited to heterosexual men either.