Dear friends, I need your input.

[tango-tee]

Am I only feeling sorry for myself?

I returned to Europe from the U.S. sixteen years ago to take care of my elderly parents. My mom has been paralyzed from a stroke for 27 years and is completely bedridden now; my dad died from colon cancer five years ago; my husband's leg was amputated last year, and my younger sister, whose partner also died of cancer, is permanently unemployed (art historian... not much of a chance in that field right now).

My family looks to me for help, they need me to "be there" for them in one way or another. At the same time, I have a full-time job in a demanding field (aircraft maintenance) but oftentimes feel that my batteries are running low. I have obligations, I need to keep going.

While I function well enough in everyday life, I have lost much of the joy in life I once had. There are few carefree moments, because I have developed the habit of being on the lookout for trouble lurking around the corner. I am now anticipating one problem coming after the other with no end in sight. Once my mom is no longer with us, it will by my baby sister who needs help. I feel so drained at only 58 years of age. Dawg, I hate that feeling of feeling sorry for myself.

Any advice you have to give will be very much appreciated. Even if it is the proverbial kick in the ass.


:nopity: