Reply #16: Wow, DemExpat---

[CoffeeCat]

Thanks for sharing that.

I think you are incredibly brave for daring to have that conversation with your mother. When you are
raised by a person like that, it is so easy to feel "small". What you did was very adult-like. Really,
you were almost parenting your mother--by being so selfless, intelligent, honest and centered.

That really is amazing.

I'm glad you were able to have that with your mother. It sounds like your conversation with her has
brought you peace, especially after she died.

I completely cut off contact with my mother 4 years ago, after she sided with my father, when I confronted
him about sexually abusing me when I was a child. After I cut off contact, I began healing. I felt as if I
escaped from a toxic dump. Also, I was adopted at birth, also--which has helped me to break ties. I have
no genetic/blood link to her or my father. After I healed a great deal, the "trauma bond" was broke--and
really, there was little left. It's so sad. When the hate and the disgust were processed--there just
wasn't a whole lot there. I often wonder why I didn't end up like her.

Light and peace to all who deal with these issues... :hug: