The only two items you'll ever need are WD-40 and duct tape.

[Cyrano]

I received that "sage" advice in one of those dumb chain email things that get passed around. But after reflecting on it for a while, I realized there was actually some wisdom hidden there.

Take the duct tape for example. If Cheney had been wrapped up in it, his hunting pal may have had half a chance to escape.

And the WD-40? Short of a nuclear blast, what else would you use to dislodge King George from the White House?

Once you view these two items in that light, their possible uses are endless.