Reply #89: I'm curious as to when the feelings/thoughts begin

[Fleshdancer]

When the pedophile is sexually developing, do the fantasies/desires for children start at the beginning of sexual development when they hit puberty? Or is it a long, gradual process that may not manifest until they're in their 20's or later? It's just all so bizarre. I know one theory is that it is linked to possible abuse in their past, but if this is the case, shouldn't there be far more female pedophiles? I haven't seen many studies on it, but the few I have seen say women account for just 1-5% of all known molestation cases. Am I wrong for assuming that more girls are molested than boys on average? Are abused boys really at a bigger risk of becoming pedophiles later in life? There must be a study of that somewhere.

I guess it could be a simple case of "bad wiring" but this theory seems too simplistic. The act of molestation is too calculating and many molesters lead a life of respect and prestige among their family members, co-workers, etc (double life). Oprah interviewed pedophiles a few times and what struck me was how many of them had elaborate, long-term plans in order to commit the acts of abuse. They would befriend and date a single mother for the purpose of molesting her child. They would wait months or longer gaining the trust of both the mother and child(ren) and they always had an excuse to counter whatever the child might say to his/her mother. They knew it was wrong but they did it anyway but it wasn't impulsive. Some would back off for a while when the mom got too suspicious.

What mental disorders exist that would allow a person to act this methodical without treatment? Don't most mental disorders begin to spiral out of control when not treated or is that just for the most extreme cases? I just don't see this as the case for the pedophiles in the Oprah interviews. Granted, I can't assume all pedophiles are exactly that way, but it's the only glimpse I've seen into that world.