Andy Rooney Takes Stand at Fraud Trial, Gets Lecture From Judge

[NNN0LHI]

http://ap.tbo.com/ap/breaking/MGB2BUW6F7E.html

WHITE PLAINS, N.Y. (AP) - Leading a parade of celebrity witnesses who claimed they were stiffed by a speakers bureau, Andy Rooney began his testimony Monday by questioning the wording of the oath to tell the truth. The CBS newsman later got a lecture from the judge for trying to interrogate a lawyer while on the witness stand.

"No, no, no, Mr. Rooney," said federal Judge Colleen McMahon, her head in her hands. "The first rule is the witness never gets to ask any questions ... even if he's a journalist." snip

Rooney, 86, entered the courtroom muttering, and he balked when asked to swear to tell "nothing but the truth, so help you God."

"I don't know about God," he said, taking the witness chair.

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[Azathoth]

1. At least we know it's not just an act he does on 60 Minutes n/t

[TwentyFive]

2. Andy Rooney is one of a kind.

"I don't know about God"

heheheheheh....I love it!

[PurityOfEssence]

21. Long time public agnostic

He's got faults aplenty, but this conviction has been held in public for a very long time, and in this society, that's quite a stance.

[xmas74]

3. I would have loved to have heard it in person.

[cornermouse]

4. Hey, he's 86. He can do anything he wants.

:bounce:

[Gman]

16. And he knows it!

[SammyBlue]

5. Cynical curmudgeons are the best

you know what's bothering me? The fact that he's 86 and going to be dead soon.

What are we going to do about Andy's death? Are you going to sit here and accept the fact that when he dies, he's dead, or will we stand up and say "screw you Grim Reaper!"

All of this, plus an Andy Rooney rant tonight on 60 Minutes.

I love Andy.

And that quote "As an old reporter, we have some secrets. The first is to use the phone book." CLASSIC!!!!

[RPM]

10. i am a cynical curmudgeon - I'll take the job...

and since i am only 28 - i'll be around for a while (hopefully)

[knitter4democracy]

6. I have always loved Andy.

My dad watched 60 Minutes for decades, faithfully. Everything in the house ground to a halt while we all sat and watched it.

I even did a Rooney piece for a Forensics Pentathalon in high school.

He's one of the best! Long live Andy!

[frankly_fedup2]

7. A typical, looking-down-ones' nose at anything or anyone he feels

is beneath his intelligence. Basically, arrogance from a man who has had some success, wealth, and fame that has made him feel superior to anyone that is not his peer.

He appears to me as someone that does not feel he should be bothered with the law . . .he is above it.

[neuvocat]

8. Rooney is a no-talent hack.

I still can't believe the way he smeared J.D. Salinger when he (Salinger) started to bring light to the TWA 800 crash (particularly when Salinger had revelations that the U.S. Navy hit it by accident with a missile).

[donheld]

9. "no-talent hack" my ass

Andy's great.

[Mr.Green93]

11. Pierre Salinger ?

[Journeyman]

12. I believe you mean Pierre Salinger. . .

J.D. Salinger is a recluse who hasn't been seen much since he wrote Catcher in the Rye.

Pierre Salinger was John Kennedy's press secretary (among other jobs over the years).

[Stainless]

13. J.D. Salinger?

That's a good one! He's the guy who wrote "Catcher in the Rye". Pierre Salinger (who recently passed away) was the one Rooney came down on. By the way Rooney has more talent in his Bushy Eyebrows than all the Hacks on Faux News.

[Medium Baby Jesus]

15. Andy was correct about Pierre Salinger

Salinger got snookered big time and never regained credibility.

[DS1]

18. Seconded. They need to put him out to pasture.

Idiot.

[annabanana]

20. didn't you see him land on the RW

and call them all "nutcases" before the election......

I thought he was pretty damn funny

[Catchawave]

14. LOL....this is so Andy!

I've read all his books...he could be Lewis Black's "Dad".

Glad he didn't get held in contempt :)

[mrdmk]

17. What was the judge going to do with him?

Put him into an old folks Home!

[BOHICA06]

26. Hey Judge ....

I've slogged my way across Europe with a rifle, been shot at, been shot, and had to listen to that pompous ass Rather for 30 years ... sorry Judge you ain't got nothing to scare me!

Andy

[meti57b]

19. There's no legal requirement to swear to G-d. He has the right to "affirm"

that he will tell the truth. That's what I always do. (Part of my job is acting as expert witness for my employer.)

[GarySeven]

22. I have seen witnesses sworn by saying "affirm"

first the judge asked, though, if it was ok with the government and defense attorneys. The witness did not want to swear an oath to God. Incidentaly, I have never seen a Bible used to swear in a witness. All that is necessary is for a witness to swear he is saying the truth, by whatever. If someone does not tell the truth, they are, of course, subject to perjury and not to the wrath of any divine being.

[Endangered Specie]

23. Reason #343 why I like Andy Rooney

:) :)

edit: reason #344
{
When defense lawyer Kerry Lawrence asked Rooney how he found Walker's address, Rooney said he didn't remember, but, "As an old reporter, we have a few secrets, and the first thing is we try the phone book."
}

[mitchtv]

24. I met him once with his wife

the Democratic National Convention in San Francisco. We were all watching the SFPD bomb squad in action. He was a gentleman.

[Voltaire99]

25. Love it--so help me Cthulhu!

Oaths to God in secular court are silly mumbo jumbo; if we weren't an infantile nation, we'd drop the custom.