Republican National Convention Schedule
Poiuyt
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Wed Jun-02-04 03:43 PM
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Republican National Convention Schedule
Someone sent this to me: REPUBLICAN NATIONAL COMMITTEE - CONVENTION SCHEDULE - New York, NY In case you are wondering whether to attend the convention, here's the agenda: 6:00 PM Opening Prayer led by the Reverend Jerry Falwell 6:30 PM Pledge of Allegiance 6:35 PM Burning of Bill of Rights (excluding 2nd amendment) 6:45 PM Salute to the Coalition of the Willing 6:46 PM Seminar #1: "Getting your kid a military deferment" 7:30 PM First Presidential Beer Bong 7:35 PM Serve Freedom Fries 7:40 PM EPA Address #1: "Mercury, it's what's for dinner" 8:00 PM Vote on which country to invade next 8:10 PM Call EMTs to revive Rush Limbaugh 8:15 PM John Ashcroft Lecture: "The homos are after your children" 8:30 PM Round table discussion on reproductive rights (MEN only) 8:50 PM Seminar #2: "Corporations - The government of the future" 9:00 PM Condi Rice sings "Can't Help Lovin' That Man" 9:05 PM Second Presidential Beer Bong 9:10 PM EPA Address #2: "Trees - The real cause of forest fires" 9:30 PM Break for secret meetings 10:00 PM Second prayer led by Cal Thomas 10:15 PM Lecture by Carl Rove: "Doublespeak made easy" 10:30 PM Rumsfeld demonstration of how to squint and talk macho 10:35 PM Bush demonstration of trademark "deer in headlights" stare. 10:40 PM John Ashcroft demonstrates new mandatory kevlar chastity belt 10:45 PM Clarence Thomas reads list of black republicans 10:46 PM Third Presidential Beer Bong 10:50 PM Seminar #3: "Education - A drain on our nation's economy" 11:10 PM Hilary Clinton Piñata 11:20 PM Second Lecture by John Ashcroft: "Evolutionists - The dangerous new cult" 11:30 PM Call EMTs to revive Rush Limbaugh again. 11:35 PM Blame Clinton 11:40 PM Laura serves milk and cookies 11:50 PM Closing Prayer led by Jesus Himself 12:00 AM Nomination of George W. Bush as Holy Supreme Planetary Overlord
rebel_liberal
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Wed Jun-02-04 04:07 PM
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The scary thing is that it is probably not that far off the mark :-( Buncha rightwingnuts!
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