1:37AM... somewhere, Peggy Noonan is sobbing...

[thebigidea]

... but I'm not...



Well, I was out filming some new sketches with friends when I heard the news... I have to admit it gave us all a blast of energy & spleen... so thanks for the hate, Ron!

[still_one]

1. Peggy Noonan and her TV lover Chris(tweety) Mathews

[thebigidea]

2. Did Tweety compare Reagan to "that fella in the New Testament"?

I coulda sworn I heard him say that, and was sputtering bile for about 10 minutes after.

[Forkboy]

3. heh..I knew I could count on you

:)

[thebigidea]

4. "My goodness!" to quote Rummy - you aint seen nothing yet

sunday we're gonna shoot a skit with Cheney and Rumsfeld smothering Reagan with a pillow for a quick boost in the polls... as Dubya prances around and cheers them on.

Best pour salt in the open wound, after all.

[thebigidea]

19. Reagan mask located... script hastily scribbled... time to pay tribute

[MikeG]

5. Cause she just ran out of whiskey.

[thebigidea]

6. ... or can't quite deal with the childproof cap on her valium...

[thebigidea]

7. Reagan: Remembering a Relic

Ronald Reagan was the first political figure I became aware of.... I was a couple of years old when he came into office, and recall staring quite often at a frightening official portrait of him in the office of my grandfather, who worked for some government agency of indeterminate type...

"Why is this frightening prunefaced man in every room here? Why is he smiling? Why?"

[Zinfandel]

8. Let me send her some more onions...

[thebigidea]

9. "Send scotch - stat!" squeals Peggy.

[MoonRiver]

20. You mean 'Piggy'. eom

[VolcanoJen]

10. Did they even air "Capital Gang" tonight? Or was Pegs too traumatized?

Oh, her pained sighs, her squints, her deep sense of moral superiority.

I don't think I could bear her eulogy.

[thebigidea]

11. well, she'll be eulogizing well into November... brace yourself

[JamesA1102]

12. Impossible Soulless people like Peggy can't cry.

[thebigidea]

13. I can see her pouring a glass of water on her face before Hardball

[thebigidea]

14. and who could forget this proud moment of Teutonic Outreach?

Figure 433463. Relic at Bitburg. Senile Seig Heils from a Holiday in Hell.

[thebigidea]

17. I should add an inset to that, showing a closeup of the SS insignia

[Catshrink]

15. She's on MSGOP....

I forgot about her.... having her shoved down our throats will make this whole thing over the top unbearable. Switch to Animal Planet and watch goofy animal videos. Or SpongeBob.

[thebigidea]

16. "It took courage for this guy to reach adulthood..."

"It took a lot of guts to follow his natural thoughts and beliefs... then it was heroic for him to yank the country..."

they cut away from her, she was a shameful spectacle.

"I was just thinking about peggy noonan and her great relationship." adds Tom Brokaw, slurring extra-hard after twelve bourbon milkshakes.

Don't ever get me to talk in a Tom Brokaw voice, I'll go on and on - though it tends to drift into my poor impersonation of Barry McAffrey, MSNBC General-in-Residence.

This could progress to a tour-de-schizophrenia performance of both at once:

McAffrey: "Trrully greaaat cappaabilities... shuper cabapibilities... unbelievable ssssshock and awe..."

BROKAW: "Barry, its trullly wonnnderfulll to beee withhh a man who schluuurs his wordssss to sssuch a shhhhplendid degree."

MCAFFREY: "Where did the internschsss hiddeee my flaschkkk? Brokaw, did you take it?"

BROKAW: "Quick, cut away to some shhhhtock footage about the greeateschhtttt generashhhhhun."

[VolcanoJen]

22. BAH!!! She drives me nuts! Check out this "eulogy."

And I thought I hated Candy Crowley more... I do not.

Did you read her pukey pre-eulogy, written in 1989, about how she couldn't wait to march behind Reagan's caisson? I mean, it's just so over-the-top. So that you don't have to click on the evil site now hosting, I'll post it for you here. You might want to eat your dinner before reading this. :D

WHAT I SAW AT THE REVOLUTION - Peggy Noonan
1989

"Every now and then when I worked in the Reagan White House, I would look up from my notes at a meeting and look at the faces around the table...or go for a walk in the halls and look into the offices of young men and women with their heads bent over a report or a memo...and I would think: "We are the ones who will walk behind the caisson. Some day when we are older he will die, and there will be a great funeral with a flag-draped coffin and a riderless horse with the boots turned backward, and behind that will be the family and friends, and behind them, us." The television cameras high up near the plywood anchor booths hastily assembled on Pennsylvania Avenue will go to a wide shot, and Dan Rather will say, "And here, the men and women who were the special assistants and the undersecretaries... When you say 'Reagan Administration,' you're talking about them."

"It wouldn't be sad. I could even imagine it as jolly. He would die with his boots on, "having known not...bitterness nor defeat." He would just have turned one hundred... He would have lived to see the Communist world break up, and seen us build the manned space station. An old man exhausted in a great struggle, one of the leaders of the Eighties we now, in the year 2011, acknowledge to have been great. Reagan, Thatcher, John Paul II, perhaps Gorbachev...dead now, and here we are gathered once again, like the end of 'Chariots of Fire', where one of the old running stars, bent and gray, turns to a friend at Harold Abraham's funeral and says, 'We did it, didn't we?' as the stern chords of 'Jerusalem' boom from the Cathedral."

[OneTwentyoNine]

27. Can't watch...I'm having my fingernails pulled out one by one....

I figure thats much less painfull than the 24/7 Ronnie fest starring Peggy "Nooner" Noonan.

David

[thebigidea]

29. the fiend is everywhere! aghhhh...

infomercials and Ronald Reagan are the only thing on at 1am...

[thebigidea]

18. a kick for the man Tweety compared to...

"that fella in the New Testament"

[comsymp]

21. My first thought on hearing Raygun croaked was for Peggy

Never did care enough to start the Nooner Suicide Watch thread, tho...

[thebigidea]

25. paging Joe Scarborough... Joe Scarborough to the main office...

[robbedvoter]

23. Sobbing? She's ready for her close-up!

I am sure she has ordered a whole new wardrobe for the orgies...

[thebigidea]

24. and a matching facelift...

probably sitting in a room full of Reagan portraits and life size cardboard cutouts, stroking her hair (which is falling out in big handfuls) whilst insanely singing "I feeeel pretty, ohhhh so prettttty..."

[comsymp]

26. Miss Haversham meets Norma Desmond

With Flush in the Von Stroheim roll. Now, who should play the monkey...

[thebigidea]

28. muahahahhah... Tweety in the William Holden role

[Kool Kitty]

30. At one point today,

she was on three different channels-AT THE SAME TIME!!! It was all-Peg TV at its finest. I looked, I barfed, I watched movies. I went grocery shopping. I came home-AND SHE WAS ON AGAIN!!!!! AARRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

[thebigidea]

31. I'm looking forward to her 50 state tour accompanying Reagan's Death Car

as well as the eventual promotional tie-ins: totebags, inaction figures, Bitburg memorabilia.

[Kool Kitty]

34. Christ almighty.

Peg has become our new "National Nightmare". She's everywhere. I half expected to run into her on the frozen food aisle in Stop 'N Shop today.

[thebigidea]

36. squinting thoughtfully at the Haaaaageeeen Daaazzz no doubt...

... and planning for projectile vomiting.

[TahitiNut]

32. I was looking forward to seeing her throw herslf on the funeral pyre.

Sadly, that's one of the few extravaganzas the Reichbots omitted from their Nuremburg Roadshow Rallies for Ronnie.

[thebigidea]

33. in a strange bit of coincidence, I shot a funeral pyre scene tonight

featuring a howling monkey-Bush dancing around, Poppy Bush gloating, and Colin Powell playing taps on a trumpet.

Of course, Cheney ends up suffocating Reagan for a press distraction.

I look forward to the hatemail.

[Kool Kitty]

35. Well, I look forward to that film.

On edit: Now I really am gagging. I'm listening to the radio, and the newsyapper just said that plans were underway to see if it is feasible to add Reagan to Mount Rushmore. And that Friday is the national day of mourning. I think I'll just bang my head against the wall for a while...

[thebigidea]

37. I'll cut it tomorrow, its quite sick. Was just fiddling with the music now

Skull & Bones imagery overload!

We're considering a little jaunt to DC on thursday for a bit of faux telejournalism... I told some of my friends that they should tell their Republican bosses that they needed thursday off to pay respects to the passing of a Great American.

Insert laughter.

[thebigidea]

38. Figure 4353455. "Reagan Reminds His Corpse Which Country He's In"