Shame and Joy

[troublemaker]

As Chris Rock would say, "I'm not saying it's right to be joyful Reagan has passed on... but I understand."

The most profound emotional reaction I've ever had about people on TV was a few hours after George Wallace was shot in 1972. It occurred near where I lived so the news was full blast all day and I felt some positive anticipation of his death from his wounds... I wasn't buoyant but I must confess a grim sense of satisfaction.

That evening his traumatized wife came on TV and seeing her simple human pain I was filled with shame for my callous un-Christian thoughts. (The fact that he was paralyzed rather than simply vanishing into the afterlife probably had something to do with it--our cultural comfort with low-consequences 'bang bang, you're dead' gun-play as entertainment should shame us all.)

When Reagan was shot it was nine years later. I was working behind a cash register when I heard the news. A customer ran up to the counter all a flutter saying, "Reagan has been shot." I responded, "Good. I hope he dies." Many customers in line were horrified, of course.

I have never regretted my thoughts or words that day for one second. Sure, Reagan was human. Yes, he was probably a decent man in some ways. But people who have grown up during or post Reagan cannot really grasp the enormity of what happened to America in the 1979-1981 period. It was like 9/11 but with no 9/11 event to even pretend to justify it. We had never before had a President who was so comfortable with the language, trappings and national philosophy of fascism.

To those born after 1970 their personal American history is a story of progress, from Reagan to GHW Bush to Clinton. The walking talking setback that is Bush II is a disappointing regression. To those of us a little older American history pre-Reagan was an arrow of human improvement... an almost unbroken line of progress that defied every McCarthy and Nixon and George Wallace who arose in opposition. And the rise of Ronald Reagan changed all of that.

Reagan's policies really weren't so bad. Hampered by a Democratic congress that would seem almost communist compared to our current Democrats, Reagan's *actual* policies were often to the left of Clinton. The problem was his dreams. His famous optimism was really just a fixed hope that someday western civilization would be defeated by comic books.

And worst of all, Reagan was all about that thing every educated American had feared most since about 1954; television.

During the 1970s America entered the decline phase that all hyper-powers eventually face. There's no shame in it. America was a great but struggling nation in 1979. By 1981 America was a pathetic formerly great country living on credit and high on nostalgia, lies and a desire to kill as an expression of our ongoing superiority. Only our relative position in the world has obscured our rapid decline as a great nation since 1980. (We are falling from an incredible height and as long as we can get others to fall even faster it looks like we're moving up.) Our decline wasn't a result of Reagan's policies. Perhaps it was inevitable. But by opting for Reagan in 1980 America chose a drugged delusion over a painful reality and you can't really turn back from that sort of thing once begun.

George Wallace was just a bad guy. Reagan was a national disease. GWBush is the metastasis of that initial infection. (In absolute terms Bush is worse than Reagan was but in absolute terms Scary Movie 2 probably took in more dollars than Gone With the Wind.)

Yes, a lot of callous things were said yesterday, but for people who had strong political ideas about America before 1980, our world was upended by that man. Our every existing conception of what America was capable of was thrown in the toilet. So there are reasons for some of the bad blood. I take no glee in the thing, but I will not feign sadness.

[The Blue Flower]

1. Amen

Before Reagan, we did not see entire families living in cars, the mentally ill wandering the streets, our elders eating cat food, enrichment programs in the public schools slashed. He made all of those things morally acceptable in America. When I complain about the state of the nation, my children, born in '72 and '73 both say, "But it was always like this, Mom." The way things are is their only frame of reference, and they think I'm exaggerating when I deny that it used to be different.

As you've said so well, we were present when the disease took root. We are witnesses to its ultimate end--unbridled greed run amok and ruining lives by the thousands, ruining America's standing in the world. Maybe now, at this extreme end of the pendulum swing, we can begin to set things right in an America that is learning humility. Perhaps Reagan's death is symbolic of the end of that pendulum swing, and the beginning of us taking our country back.

[troublemaker]

3. I hope for that also

When I was in the art business I would see people speculate on the theory that artist's works always go up when they die. In reality, the works of most artists decline when they die... you get to take a clear look at their work with no hope that they will improve the oeuvre. There it is... plop.

And it's usually not all that.

[NewYorkerfromMass]

2. Excellent post

I myself forgot how I reacted to the news of Reagan's shooting.
It was not much different than your own.

[rumguy]

4. good posts

if a little on the bleak side...

here's the line that gets me: "His famous optimism was really just a fixed hope that someday western civilization would be defeated by comic books."

Are you a writer?

[salin]

5. Well done.

and very to the point.