A letter to the Bush Campaign about Ronald Reagan

[ShaneGR]

To: Karl Rove
From: sgr2

Karl! Congratulations on a successful Reagan memorial week. You managed to shield your candidate from criticism for an entire week. With the exception of concealed shot across your bow by Ron Reagan jr., your man stayed above the fray and even appeared dignified during his eulogy of President Reagan.

Back to reality. Your campaign has spent 125 million dollars and your candidate still trails a frightfully quiet John Kerry by 3-7 points in all of the national polls. President Bush also trails in statewide polls conducted in Ohio, Florida, Pennsylvania, Nevada.... well, you get the picture. Your campaign has attempted to recreate the triangulation strategy Clinton used on Dole in 1996 but, unfortunately, events completely out of your control have capsized your campaign like a bad recreation of the Titanic Disaster. You must be frightened by more killing every day in Iraq, a luming grand jury investigation of the Plame affair, and the prospect of a Kerry campaign with 150 million to spend. They outraised you in both April and May and spent less than half as much.

You must be desperate.

So here's my advice to you Karl. Use Reagan's image as much as possible. In fact, remove all images of George W Bush from all of your campaign communication. Ronald Reagan is not dead. We had the technology. We rebuilt him. Ol' George donated his body for the reincarnation. How much could the plastic surgery cost? The voice is a problem, but we have enough audio of Reagan to mix and match enough catch-phrases. I hope he's capable of lip-synch.

Reagan/Cheney 2004!

[checks-n-balances]

1. Great letter, but hope nobody's serious about ually sending it to him!

Why give him tips that he'll actually use, or open yourself to his ire? If your roles were reversed, he'd be sending you a letter with bogus suggest that would doom you to failure.

Let this be one of those letters you wrote for catharsis but never intended to send it. Besides, that shyster doesn't deserve your effort.