Who would like to join my wife & I in a wild S&M swinging cage party?

[mopaul]

I go to church every sunday morning, i swear. i support george bush and the conservatives because they impeached that disgusting bill clinton. i'm a powerful republican senator, and i enjoy having a dominatrix put me in my place like a puppy. although i support family values and i like to keep a respectable image, i do occasionally enjoy seeing my wife serviced by several strange men in latex masks, like most husbands.

like you, and all decent americans, i was shocked and appalled by the sight of janet jackson's firm, yet supple breast during a football game on t.v. that sort of filthy exhibition should be kept in the sleazy after hours swingers clubs, located on the liberal side of town. i don't want my children exposed to such degenerate perversion on t.v., while their mother and i are at the weekly orgy.

while i will not support gay marriage, or funding for obscene art, or filthy documentaries by michael imMOOREal, i do support watching my wife forced to have unprotected sex in public with people we've never even met.

sadly, now i and many other Republicans are being FORCED to admit to certain youthful indiscretions. it's like they were trying to use my sexuality as a political weapon against me. it's as if they were suggesting that i can't do my job just because i like my wife to give strangers blowjobs.

the liberal media is out of control in this country. they make a big deal about certain republican's wanderings from the marital path of virtue, but look at that sexual predator bill clinton, out selling a book about cheating on his wife. the gall of that man, who left the white house unclean and disgraced. i have NEVER cheated on MY wife. i just forced her to copulate with a few sadists and normal americans practicing their pursuits of happiness.

so, while i am no longer serving the people, my wife will soon be servicing the people, while i watch. we're in the book, so give us a call if you are a cum-passionate conservative looking for some honest to god good clean fun with a sado-masochist twist, no smokers, no fatties, and no liberals. otherwise, anything goes.

j.r.

[pagerbear]

1. Please!

"my wife & me"
Must refer to your debauchery with proper grammar!

[mopaul]

4. i wish DU had 'grammar check'

is it REALLY 'my wife and me'?...cause if it really is, i have time to change it. i got a B+ in english class, but that was in the 20th century. here i thought i was sounding so intellectuable.

[Junkdrawer]

7. in this context, I believe the correct grammar is "me and the wife"...

The use of the article "the" helps to objectify her. :evilgrin:

[Kukesa]

11. That's correct, JunkDrawer. n/t

[Mayberry Machiavelli]

2. LOL. Afterwards, at Church and the shrub rally, we will speak nothing of

this, or ever again.

[lil-petunia]

3. You forgot to blame the media strongly enough

:toast:

[mopaul]

5. the media is on a fishing expedition to destroy me politically

it's like a vast left wing conspiracy or something. these liberals will sink to any level to make us republican swingers look bad.
look what they did to that nice man robert livingston

[BlueEyedSon]

6. "janet jackson's firm, yet supple breast"

You need to get your TV adjusted!

[Jeff in Cincinnati]

8. Best joke I heard yesterday...

Jack Ryan is pulling out. He would have done it yesterday, but he wanted to make sure people were watching.

ba-da-bing!

[anarchy1999]

9. You never cease to amaze me. Why don't you tell us all how you

really feel. No stop, don't, none of us want to see you be banned.

Love you lots, MoPaul and missed you too, while you were gone. So very glad you are back.

[mopaul]

10. that's funny cause i ALWAYS cease to amaze me

and on the day i get banned, i'm sure i will have deserved it.